


Maybe

by GabbysLost113



Category: The 100 (TV), clexa - Fandom
Genre: Clexa, F/F, Minor Octavia Blake/Lincoln
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-05-26 20:53:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 87,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6255421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GabbysLost113/pseuds/GabbysLost113
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is with Finn. Lexa with Costia. One party and one class can change everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have never written anything before. Let me know if I should keep going... or if I suck horribly.

Art or Human Biology. That was the question that had been plaguing Clarke Griffin since she began University last Fall. Now an entire year later and it was time to make a decision. She went over the pro-con list in her head for millionth time. The applications for both Human Bio and Art sitting on the desk in front of her. She closed her eyes hoping for some kind of sign that told her what to do with the rest of her life, instead her phone began to ring.  
Finn: Babe! Where are you?

Right that’s not how the universe works Clarke thought grumpily. She pushed her phone into her bag without replying, and began packing her stuff to leave the library and head back to her dorm. Finn could wait, he didn’t understand how serious of a life decision this was for her. He was just too willing to always live in the moment which was fun when they started dating three months ago, but it was losing its appeal. Clarke wanted more than to just survive she wanted to live, and not the live in the moment kind of live, but waking up happy, satisfied, content in where her life was going kind of live. She wanted more, she just had figure out how to get it.

Stepping out of the library it was freezing cold, she felt the goosebumps rise on her arms right away. To trek back to her dorm felt like a journey, one she wished she didn’t have to go on. Bracing the cold she walked the half mile to her room, only to find her roommate Octavia throwing her entire wardrobe everywhere including Clarkes very own bed. She felt her stomach filling with heat, she was just so tired and wanted to go to sleep, but knowing Octavia the past year she knew, sleep would be very far away.

Octavia was so engrossed in her mess making she didn’t even notice when Clarke walked into the room.

“O! What are you doing now!?”

Octavia jumped what seemed to be three feet in the air. “OH MY GOD Clarke! Don’t just go sneaking up on me like that!

She received a very convincing eye roll from Clarke, and a hand gesture to the room, as in what the hell?!

“So do you remember that hot guy we saw on campus the other day, tall tan, the sexiest and most intense face you have ever seen?”

Clarke pushed the clothes over on her bed and sat down trying to avoid tripping on shoes that were strewn everywhere. “You mean the guy you drooled over for five minutes and then wouldn’t shut the hell up about even though it’s been a week since you saw him and you have never once spoken to him or seen him again? How could I forget?” That response got her a shirt to the face and a triumphant looking roommate. She just stuck her tongue out in response.

“Anyway Griffin! Turns out my teammate Anya from Lacrosse is his cousin! I saw them talking this morning before practice. I thought they were dating at first which was such a blow. But when he left she walked by and told me to stop drooling over her family!” Octavia wiped her hand across her head dramatically, “that was a close one.”

Clarke rolled her eyes, “That still doesn’t explain how an apparent tornado has hit ur room and not the rest of the dorms.”

“I’m getting there!!! Anyway…. She mentioned there’s a party tonight and invited me to go, I was too embarrassed at first with all the drool on my face but then she said she would introduce me to her cousin. His name is Lincoln by the way. And I am inviting you Princess so let’s get it moving and get dressed.”

“Octavia Blake, do I have to? I just want to go to bed!”

“Oh no you need to make sure I don’t make a fool of myself, besides I want you to meet some of my teammates, you’ll like them trust me. You can even bring Finn if you want.”

Crap thought Clarke I never texted him back… She picked up her phone to see she had another text from him

Finn: Hey Princess, you forget about me?

Clarke: Hey Finn sorry, got distracted. Octavia is dragging me to a party :( Wanna come with?

Finn: Meet you in your room in 30.

Clarke looked up to see an expectant Octavia hovering above her. “Fine I will go but don’t expect me to enjoy it.”

“Yes! You will have fun everyone on the team is super nice and chill. Well Lexa is a bit uptight but I’m sure we can fix that with some alcohol, we will get some for you too or else you two might end up killing the mood together.” That earned her another eye roll from Clarke.

“Shut up Blake, I am being an amazing friend just by going,” she said while running her hand over her pillow longingly.

“The bestest friend!” Octavia agreed as she threw another shirt onto the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is almost double the length of the last one.... Things are slowly moving along. Hope you enjoy.

Octavia finally chose something to wear (only took another twenty minutes)

She wore simple Blue Jeans with shirt that showed off all the right places. Clarke on the other hand was still sitting in bed begging for sleep, when jeans and a shirt got thrown at her.

“Hey!”

“What?! You can’t go looking like that, and for Christ sake do your hair woman!” Clarke looked at herself in the mirror, Octavia had a point. She began changing into the black jeans and white shirt throwing on the blue jacket on top to complete the look. But her hair on the other hand would need a lot more work. She went to the bathroom and got to work, but did not have the strength to really try. She ended up just combing it through and twisting back her hairs in the front so she wouldn’t have to push her back all day long. Her blue eyes looked swollen from lack of sleep, so she threw on some eyeliner and mascara before Octavia could yell at her again.

She looked herself over, not too bad if she said so herself looking up when she heard a knock on the door and it being opened.

“Clarke, lover boy is here!” She rolled her eyes at the name but made her way back into the shared room where she saw Finn sitting on her bed looking amused as Octavia running around making sure she looked good before leaving.

Finn looked handsome in his Jeans and button down, his long hair repeatedly getting in his eyes. He got up when he saw her and made his way to where she stood.

“You look beautiful princess.” She saw him going to kiss her lips and she turned her head slightly last second making his lips brush her cheek instead. He pulled back with question in his eyes and she just smiled and kissed his cheek in return stepping around him.

“Thanks. O, are you ready yet, the earlier we get there the earlier we can leave.”

“Clarke!!! Please don’t be a kill joy tonight, just relax and help a girl out!”

Clarke sighed, “Sorry, I will do my best to have a good time, but really are you ready yet? Lincoln is waiting for you Cinderella.”

“He is not,” she said quietly blushing slightly.

“Alright girls let’s get this party started!” Finn yelled while walking to the door.

It was a fifteen minute walk to Anyas on the other side of campus. She lived in one of the fancier places on campus, Grounder Quad. Instead of the tall Ark tower like Octavia and Clarkes room, Grounder quad was made up of houses that were separated into suites. Each suite had four bedrooms, two bathrooms, kitchen, and living area. Only seniors really lived there.  
Once in the hall of the house you could hear the party, and it actually woke Clarke up. She was ready to have some fun. She was so focused on the music that she ran right into Octavias back.

“What the hell?”

Octavia had her eyes closed and was trying to regulate her breathing. “Sorry I’m nervous, give me a second.” Clarke nodded in response even though Octavia still had her eyes closed. All of of sudden her eyes popped open, she stood taller and plastered a smile across her face and walked right into the dorm.

“WHATS UP BITCHES!?”

Clarke couldn’t help but grin widely at the outburst. Octavia started going around talking to everyone, cheering on the drinkers, grinding along with the dancers, all while looking to spot Lincoln.  
Clarke slowly walked around the room with Finn trailing her trying to spot somewhere to claim as her spot for the night. She saw a space on the couch and made a bee line for it until she saw who occupied it.

Lincoln was talking to someone in what seemed to be a very animated conversation. He was talking with his hands flying everywhere and a concentrated expression on his face. From this angle she could not see who he was talking to, except that it was a girl. The girl was sitting very stiff, her back looking uncomfortably straight and tense from what Clarke could see. The girls hair went more than halfway down her back and had small braids throughout it. It was beautiful.

Clarke was pulled from her nosy staring when she felt a tug on her hand and she looked up to see Finn smiling at her. Right Finns here too she thought and then chastised herself for having that kind of reaction towards her boyfriend. He pointed to where people were dancing and tugged her hand in that direction. She smiled and nodded walking with him.

Clarke loved music and dancing. It was another form of art, and she knew how to appreciate art. So when they got to the dance floor she closed her eyes, let the music tell her body what to do and went with it. Finn placed his hands on her hips and tried to move to the music with her. He wasn’t very good, after three songs he started pulling her away from dancing. She shook her head and moved in closer to his ear, “You go ahead, I’m going to dance a little longer.” He frowned but nodded and walked towards where the drinks were. Clarke looked to see what had happened with Lincoln and the girl, but in place of the girl was a very happy Octavia and a now laughing Lincoln. Clarke smiled to herself before closing her eyes and going with the music.

Almost five songs later Clarke realized Finn should have been back by then but she could not see him. She walked around for a bit seeing if she could see him anywhere. She went to the door to check if he went into the hall, she opened the door and heard yelling. Finn was yelling.

“Will you wait a second Raven! Let me explain.”

“Explain what?! How you broke up with me a month ago without any explanation and then next time I see you, you're all puppy eyed with some new girl!? Finn we were together for almost two years!!

Clark froze not wanting to be seen, trying to catch the rest of the conversation while processing what had already been said. He broke up with that girl, Raven, a month ago? But they started dating three months ago. Was Clarke the other woman? All she knew was she was confused as hell.

“I love you, Rae, you known that, but it wasn’t the same anymore, it got too hard I couldn’t do it.”

“Yeah conveniently it got too hard for you after I got hurt, having a crippled girlfriend, I can see how that’s a downer. Go float yourself Finn.” 

Clarke closed the door after that. She felt the shock in her entire body. Who was this Raven girl, and what happened between her and Finn, did he cheat on Raven with her? What was she supposed to do? Shouldn’t she feel more than just shock? Clarke just walked towards the bedrooms and leaned against one of the doors, trying to figure out what her next move was going to be. When all of sudden she was falling backwards into somebody. More accurately onto somebody.

“WHAT THE FUCK!?”

Clarke somehow managed to twist around while falling on top of someone and slamming her head into the other persons hard enough to see stars. In the fall the other person, by the sounds of yelling, a girl had wrapped her arms around Clarkes waist in an attempt to probably catch her. 

When Clarke stopped seeing stars she opened her eyes and saw Green, the most amazing green she had ever seen and she couldn’t breathe because of it, well that or she hurt herself a lot more then she thought in the fall. Then she realized that green she was seeing was a girls eyes, who was definitely not happy to see her, more like if looks could kill Clarke would be dead.  
“Can you get off of me!?” Clarke felt the girl pushing Clarke off of her, so she just rolled over onto the floor next to the girl and started rubbing her head, which seriously hurt like hell. She looked over and saw the girl getting up, with the same hair as the girl Lincoln was talking to earlier.

“Hey, sorry about that, I didn’t realize you were opening the door and I have horrible reflexes, are you okay?” Clarke started to stand but realized she was too close to the girl who spun around very fast catching her off guard.

Clarke jumped back, thrown off by the rage she saw looking back at her. “Can you just get out of my room!?”

“Jeeze sorry.” She started walking back to the main room chancing to look back and seeing the very angry, very bitchy girl, rub her own head in pain while closing the door again.  
She sees Octavia talking to Lincoln still and walks over. Octavia looking up and eyes bulging.

“What the hell happened to your head!?”

“I fell onto some girl and banged heads with her, she by the way is a bitch. It is not like I did it on purpose! She then proceeded to yell at me and throw me out of her room.”

“Wait her room? What did she look like?” Lincoln asked trying not to smile.

“Green eyes, long brown hair, crazy scary. You were talking to her earlier” Lincoln started laughing so hard it caught Octavia and Clarke by surprise.

“You met my sister, Lexa Woods. You pissed her off and are alive to tell the tale? I’m impressed.”

“Lexa is your sister!? But she’s so…. And you’re so….. HOW?” Octavia was practically yelling.

“She’s adopted, and hey she may be a little uptight but she’s really not bad, I swear I would know, she just takes a little getting used to.” Octavia rolled her eyes at Clarke when Lincoln said this.  
Just then Clarke felt arms grab around her waist and she spun around to a very happy, very much smiling Finn.

“Hey babe where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how was that? Did you like their sort of introduction to each other? I like thinking Lincoln and Lexa are related. Plus we all know Finn..... sorry buddy this is a Clexa story you gotta go.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke likes to avoid things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay these are seriously getting longer and longer.  
> Hope you guy are enjoying. Im gonna try really hard to update regularly, and so far have been doing very good with it, considering three chapters up in less than a week. Im gonna start working on the next one now. ENJOY!

Clarke pulled away as fast as she could from Finns arms, looking at him, wondering if this could really be the same boy she heard yelling the hallway minutes before. He looked so care free, like nothing had happened.

“Hey, you okay?” He grabbed her hand and started playing with her fingers, she looked behind him and saw a girl shaking her head with tears in her eyes making her way to the bedrooms. She had a limp and Clarke realized she was wearing a brace on one of her legs.

“Where have you been?” Her eyes were still following the girl, she had her hair dark hair in a ponytail and red jacket on. She went straight to the room Clarke had been in, knocking first before, Clarke saw the girl, Lexa, she remembered open the door to let the girl Raven in.

“Oh, all the dancing got me tired, I just needed some fresh air so I went on a little walk.”

How was he doing this? How many times had he lied to her before? Clarke thought she knew Finn, then again it had only been three months, and according to what she had just heard, the first two he had another girlfriend.

“I need to go to the bathroom, be right back.” She started walking towards the bathroom near Lexas room, but thought better of it and went to the other side of the house.

She locked herself in and just sat on the floor. What was she supposed to do? She felt wrong, but not like, how she knew should feel. It should hurt like physically? Or was that just things people made up in stories? She liked Finn, she know she did, but maybe not as much as she was supposed to. She stood up and looked at herself in the mirror, concentrating. Blue eyes, Blonde hair, pink lips. She stared into her eyes waiting for something, but nothing happened, so she walked out of the bathroom like nothing ever happened.

The party lasted awhile longer, but Clarke just couldn’t get into it. She pulled Octavia over to the side.

“Hey, I’m not feeling too well, you mind If I head back to the room, I mean I know you wanted me so you would feel better around Lincoln, but you’re doing fine honestly. He looks half in love with already.”

Octavia looked back at Lincoln who was watching her and waiting for her return. She threw her arms around Clarkes shoulders, “Thank you Clarke,” she whispered.

Clarke took that as an okay and started heading to the door without telling Finn, who jumped up from his seat next to Lincoln and started to follow her out.

“Trying to run out on me babe?”

Clarke grimaced at the sentimental word. “No I’m just exhausted, I’m going to head back to my room and call it a night.”

“Want some company,” Finn said in a flirty tone, while they walked towards Clarkes room.

Clarke felt her stomach churn at the thought of Finn touching her sexually ever again. Which is weird considering that is how they met, one drunk party with Octavia, which ended with random sex in someone’s bathroom. That was the one thing Finn had going for him, Clarke loved sex and he was pretty good at it.

But now that she knew, their first time and probably a couple more times after that, she had been unknowingly hurting that girl did not sit well with her. And still she noticed she felt worse for Raven than she did for herself.

“I’m just really tired Finn. Go home I will speak to you tomorrow.”

She could see the hurt in his eyes, she let him quickly press his lips to hers, but pulled away just as fast.

“Ok…. Goodnight, text me when you wake up so we can meet up.”

Clarke nodded and opened her door, closing it quickly behind herself. She could see Finns shadow standing on the other side of the door. She waited until she heard his footsteps walk away before she stepped away from the door.

Lexa POV

She slammed her door shut rubbing her head.

Stupid fucking party, she didn’t know why she agreed to let Anya have it at their place anymore, all she got out of it was a fight with her brother, and what seemed to be a growing knot on her head.  
She was so tired of college, of this in between stage in her life, she wasn’t a kid anymore, even though she honestly never felt like one anyway, but she was also not where she wanted to be in her life, stable, and left alone.

You’ll love being twenty one everyone said, it will be a great time they told her, yeah no. Everyone was wrong, only thing new was that she could buy her own alcohol without Anyas help.

She laid down on her bed, looking over at the picture frame she kept close to her. Costia looked beautiful with her caramel skin and curls going everywhere, her hazel eyes shining. Lexa picked up the picture and put it face down. She hadn’t spoken to Costia for almost a week now. Sadly that wasn’t anything new, this long distance relationship wasn’t easy. Hell Lexa didn’t even feel like she was in a relationship anymore.

She picked up her phone, nope still nothing, not a text, a phone call, or even one those stupid emojis anymore. 

A knock on her door brought her out of her thoughts. She stood up and opened the door ready to yell at whatever drunk person was bothering her, instead she opened it to a very upset looking Raven. She stepped back allowing the girl room to enter in.

Lexa sat on her bed while Raven took the floor, neither of them saying anything, knowing each other enough to wait until the other was ready. Raven sniffled and wiped her face, Lexa ignored it knowing Raven wouldn’t want to bring attention to her tears.

About ten minutes of silence and then Raven climbed up onto the bed and laid down next to Lexa. Lexa turned her head to look at her friend really for the first time since entered her room. Raven eyes widened in surprise.

“What the hell is growing on your forehead?”

Lexa just stared back, glaring at her friend, while she slowly brought her hand to touch where she felt the pain. Yup there was definitely a bump. Stupid drunk people she thought.

“Some drunk girl fell onto me and banged her head into mine during the fall.”

“Wow that’s the most action you have had in months.” She said with a light smile filled with sadness.

Lexa smacked the girls shoulder. “Shut up it hasn’t been that long since Costia visited.” Thinking about it, it has actually been that long, about three months, not since last term. Lexa sighed, and then tried to act like she didn’t.

She just looked at Raven expectantly waiting for the girl to talk, she knows Raven felt her watching because the girl reddened, sat up starting mess with her leg brace.

“So I saw Finn a couple of minutes ago.” Lexas eyes widened waiting for her to go on. 

“He is with a new girl, apparently they have been together for a couple of months, as in more than the amount that we have officially been broken up. I didn't get a good look at her though, just saw him grinding on a girl while dancing.”

Lexa felt the rage deep inside of her. “Where did you see him,” she growled. 

“Here, actually.” At that Lexa jumped up and started stomping towards her door, Raven grabbed her arm before she could reach the door.

“Let go of me Raven, he will not get away with this. Not in my home will he hurt my best friend and get away with it. Jus drein jus daun.” Raven rolled her eyes at that.

“Okay first off, you need to stop watching that show, it isn’t real Lexa. Second no, I don’t want to cause a scene he isn’t worth it. He can have his whore.” Lexa shrugged at the first comment, and then stood taller to make her point come across.

“He is worth nothing, he is lower than dirt, the scum of this earth, if he was on fire in front of me I’d take my water and give it to a dead plant before I tried to help him. But he needs to pay, he can’t just leave you the way he did and get off with no consequences. You deserve better.” She said the last part softly seeing the hurt in Ravens eyes. 

She sighed and laid back down pulling Raven down with her. Raven who was so strong both physically, and mentally. She did deserve better than this, and Lexa knew one day Raven would find what she deserved. 

“Can I stay here tonight?” Raven practically whispered.

Lexa grabbed the extra pillow and passed to Raven, “if you tell anyone about me being nice I will deny it till the end.”

“We have known each other since seventh grade it’s about time you start being nice to me. I’m awesome.”

Lexa rolled her eyes at that. “If you kick me in your sleep, just know you will never wake up.” 

Clarkes POV

She woke up the next morning with the worst possible headache, which made no sense since she didn’t touch a drop of alcohol last night. She kept her eyes closed and touched her where she felt a lump. Well that explained the headache. 

She looked over and saw that Octavia never seemed to make it home last night. She picked up her phone and saw it was already eleven-thirty. She had a text from Finn she ignored while she looked for Octavia’s number and pressed call.

It rang three times. Then a very grumpy Octavia picked up the phone “Omg please stop yelling at me.” Clarke giggled in response.

“Where did you sleep last night missy?”

“I’m grabbing breakfast with Lincoln right now. Talk to you when I get home later.”

“I see how it is Blake, had a little too much fun last night, maybe it went on until morning even. You just can’t wait, can you?”

“Goodbye now Clarke.” And the phone went dead. Clarke smiled to herself, at least someone had a good night.

Clarke went to her messages to see what Finn wanted.

Finn: Good morning beautiful, hope you slept well, want to grab breakfast?

Clarke didn’t understand how Finn was so good at pretending. Pretending to be someone he wasn’t. Pretending that he cared. She couldn’t do that.

Clarke: I’m not feeling good today, might be coming down with something. Gonna stay in.

Finn: Want me to come over and keep you company? I could bring soup :)

Clarke: No thanks, I will talk to you 2mm.

Clarke turned her phone off, not wanting to have to read another text from Finn, or have to explain why she was really avoiding him. She just wanted a day to herself and that’s what she was going to do.

She grabbed her laptop and snuggled under covers, going straight to Netflix, needing to binge watch something. That’s how she spent the rest of her day.

******* Next Day*******  
Clarke woke to her alarm going crazy, and then Octavia throwing a pillow at her when she didn’t turn it off fast enough. Today started her eight week course, which sucked because it was at eight on a Monday morning. Clarke was not a morning person.

She tried to get ready as fast as she could, she really did, at least that’s what she told herself when she was standing outside of the classroom ten minutes late. It was a big class though, a lecture with about a hundred other students.

The problem was that Clarke seemed to be the last to arrive, she looked through the window trying to find an empty seat before she entered. She spotted one around the middle row, and made a straight beeline for it.

Except.. Crap, she looked all around and couldn’t find not one single seat. She was tempted to sit on the floor between the aisles when she looked up and noticed that the Professor had stopped talking and was pointing her in the direction of the one empty seat.

The one empty seat that happened to be right next to Lexa, the girl Clarke fell on at the party, she had the bruised head to prove it.

With her head down, hoping Lexa wouldn’t recognize her Clarke headed in her direction. When she glanced to the side, once seated, she was getting that same death glare from the night of the party, except it was much scarier now, with Lexa sporting an identical bruise to Clarkes.

Clarke just prayed in her head to God that Lexa wouldn’t kill her before she had a chance to run, when class was over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear Lexa and Clarke will have more interactions, dont kill me! Sit back enjoy the ride and trust me!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa get new assignments. They begin to try and figure out the current relationships they are in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy!

Lexas POV  
She was focused taking notes that is until the professor just stopped talking. When she looked up she saw him gesturing to someone, looking over Lexa saw a blonde coming towards her. The girl looked familiar. She was studying the girl who sat next to her, when she noticed the bruise on the blondes head.

She sneered at the memory, the girl from the party. The girl looked up at that moment catching lexas expression and quickly looked down. 

Of course she would get stuck sitting next to her. Because Lexa Woods had the greatest luck.

She tried to focus back in on what the professor was saying, but it was literally impossible. Blondie couldn’t stay still, she kept bopping her leg up and down causing Lexas desk to shake. Lexa was trying so hard to stay calm, she kept counting in her head, but it wasn’t working. She kept glaring at the girl hoping she could feel it the whole time.

She couldn’t take it anymore. She threw her hand out grabbing the blondes leg who yelped as if she had been burned. “Will you stop moving?!”She looked at Lexa with pure terror, which Lexa couldn’t understand, she had never done anything to the girl before.

“Ladies?” Lexa looked away from the Blonde and to the front of the room at the professor, “I would like to see you both after class.” Crap she thought, this is not how you want the first day of class to go.

“Yes ser.” You both said at the same time. Lexa looked at the Blonde who was now looking down at her paper playing with her pencil. She started shaking her leg again, but then looked up and saw Lexa watching her and stopped right away. Lexa just shook her head, hoping one of them would find a new seat before next class. 

When class was over Lexa began to make her way towards the front of classroom, Blondie following behind her at a distance. The professor was talking to another student so they waited for him to finish.

“Come here girls. What are your names?”

“Lexa Woods.”

“Clarke Griffin. I just want apologize ser for my outburst earlier, I did not mean to disrupt class.”

“Of course Ms.Griffin. But if you both are going to do well, you need to not focus on each other and focus on me. You can be friends somewhere else outside of this classroom.” He kept gesturing between the two of them.

“We aren’t friends.” Lexa scolded herself for feeling the need to point that out to her Professor and to… Clarke. She felt the heat rush to her ears with embarrassment. She looked over and saw Clarke glaring at her. She just shrugged in response.

“I can see that now.” He stood there in silence a moment thinking. “Which is why I’m going to assign you new seats.”

Lexas eyes narrowed in question. There were so assigned seats in college, what was he getting at?

“I want you two to sit next to each other it can be anywhere in the room, just make sure you sit beside each other . This class is Sociology of Relationships. I want to use you two as a study for myself, to see if having to be together will change the way you see each other. Along with sitting together you are both assigned to each other for any partner work.”

Lexa and Clarke began to try and protest but the Professor just raised his hand to silence them, which pissed Lexa off even more.

“I look forward to seeing you two next class. Enjoy the rest of your day.” And with that he walked out of the room.

Lexa was dumbfounded, speechless, just staring at Clarke who stared back. Lexa didn’t know the first thing about Clarke and she was going to keep it that way, she felt no desire to know the other girl and was sure Clarke felt the same way.

“This is going to be the longest eight weeks of my life.” And with that Lexa began walking away from Clarke who looked offended at her words.

“It isn’t going to be a walk in the park for me either!”

Lexa turned, surprised Clarke had the courage to respond to her, she studied Clarke for a moment, noting the girls very blue eyes, but she had nothing to say so she just nodded and left the Blonde standing there.

Calrkes POV

She watched Lexa walk out of the room and sighed. This was going to suck. The girl obviously hated Clarke all because of that one night. It was a stupid accident, and now they were stuck together for the rest of semester.

Lexa couldn’t even sit calmly next to Clarke during that one class, which was only an hour long. She had been glaring at Clarke the entire time, Clarke tried not to pay her no mind. But knowing the other girl was watching her made her nervous, and when she’s nervous she needs to move. So it really was Lexas fault that she kept moving, and she didn’t expect the other girl to grab her so that yelp was pure instinct.

Clarke realized she needed to go when the next class started walking in and sitting down. She ran to her desk and grabbed her stuff, noticing a pair of black gloves on Lexas desk. Of course the she left something, Clarke didn’t know if she should grab it and give it to the girl when she saw her next class on Wednesday, or leave it just to be spiteful. She grabbed them and shoved them in her bag.

She walked out of the room and saw Finn standing there waiting for her. He walked up to her and kissed her, he went to make it deeper but she pulled away and gave him a slight smile.

“How are you feeling beautiful? I missed you yesterday.”

“I feel better thanks, just needed some rest I guess.” What she really needed was time away from him so she could think. Did she want to confront him? He obviously cheated on Raven with Clarke but she knew that she wasn’t the one who had been betrayed, not really. They started sleeping together three months ago, but had become explicit around the time that he supposedly left Raven. Could she be mad, probably, if she wanted to it was probably reason enough to break up with him.

Clarke wanted to know more though, she was curious more than anything now, what happened to Raven. How had they met, did he leave her only for Clarke or because of Ravens disability? Two years seemed like such a long time to walk away from just for a good lay.

Clarke liked knowing that if she wanted Finn she could have him, he treated her very well, willing to do anything to make her happy, any other girl would be over the moon in love with him. Maybe she would get there one day, and she could wait for that, wait for the possibility of happiness.

He grabbed her hand and they began walking to get some breakfast, she was starving and hated eating alone. Finn knew this and it is why he woke up early, just to make sure she didn’t have to. Clarke wanted that kind of stability, it was comfortable.

But she wanted to test him, to see if she could catch him slip up about Raven. Apparently Raven knew Lexa so maybe Finn knew Lexa too.

“So back at the party I fell onto some girl which is where I got this,” she said pointing at her head. “The girl was such a bitch and just started yelling at me, she lived in the house we went to. Well I saw her again this morning, she is in my class. Her name is Lexa and she is on the team with Octavia.”

Clarke stopped talking trying to study Finns reaction to the name, to see if he showed that recognized who Lexa was. His face was blank, he just nodded for her to continue.

“Well I had to sit next to her because it was the only empty seat, and she glared at me through all of class like a psycho, then out of nowhere she grabbed me and told me to stop moving, I may have yelled, but she surprised me. We got in trouble with the professor. Guess what he told us after class?”

“To stop interrupting his class?” Finn said with a shrug.

“Well yeah, but he also assigned me to her as a partner for the rest of the class, and he said we have to sit next to each other every single class. Like what is that? When two people don’t like each other you don’t force them to work together, that always ends bad. He said it was some kind of experiment.”

“That’s weird, you can probably go complain to someone, so you don’t have to spend so much time with Lexa, she is not someone you want to have to spend time with.”

Clarke stopped walking at that comment, thinking that she got him to slip up. He looked at her and shrugged his shoulders and added, “at least from what you told me about her.”

Clarke shook her head, “I wont complain about it, especially if I go to someone and they can’t do anything and it gets back to Professor Kane that I am going behind his back, it won’t end well for me.”  
They stood online and Finn pulled her in close, kissing her on the forehead, “Sorry babe, this is going to suck for you, but you know I’m here for you.”

Clarke let herself relax into him for a moment taking comfort in his words. This is how she should feel when she is with someone right? It felt good, so she just decided to go with it for now, she could figure it out as they went.

***Later that Night***

Clarke had explained what happened in class earlier to Octavia whose response was to burst out laughing. 

“O! This isn’t funny! You make her sound like a nightmare, and now she’s going to be in my life for the next eight weeks, and she hates me!”

“Look Lexa is just very intense, she’s a great Lacrosse player though, the best on the team actually. I have only ever see her be somewhat friendly to Anya and some girl she hangs out with, Lincoln says she isn’t bad and that she is a good sister though, but I haven’t seen the side of her that they see so I don’t know.”

Clarke groaned and put her pillow on her face. 

“But I hear she has gets all A’s so atleast with her as a partner your grade at the end will be great.”

“I don’t need her for grades Octavia, I do just fine on my own thanks. By the way she left her gloves in class and I’m too nice of a person so I grabbed them.” She was going through her bag trying to find them.

“Can you give them to her for me?” She was holding the gloves out to Octavia who was just smiling and shaking her head no.  
Clarke exhaled loudly, “why not!?”

“I’m not getting in between you two, I have to deal with her for another year, while you have the rest of the semester. I’m not getting on her bad side along with you.”

“Your'e annoying Octavia.”

“Its why you love me Griffin,” she said while winking and blowing a kiss to her. Clarke rolled her eyes and shoved the gloves back in her bag.  
Maybe the gloves could be a peace offering, and Lexa would stop glaring at her with those green eyes of hers. 

Wednesday 7:58 Am

Clarke walked into the classroom, seeing how packed it was again. She began looking around to see if she saw Lexa anywhere. She couldn’t find the brown braids anywhere. She started walking up and down the aisles when she saw a waving hand. Lexas hair was up in a messy bun and she was wearing glasses. Not her usual look Clarke thought.

Lexas bag was on the seat, she had been making sure to save a seat for Clarke.

“Thanks for saving me a seat.” Lexa grabbed her bag.

“Not like I had a choice Clarke.” Clarke shrugged her shoulders in response and sat down. She automatically began to shake her leg. Lexa just made her nervous. 

“Seriously, I cant handle that shaking, please stop or I might lose my mind.” Clarke looked over at Lexa who was staring at her very intently. She stopped shaking her leg but kept looking at the girl. Those eyes she remembered, still so very beautiful and green.

“Sorry, nervous habit. I will try to stop. Umm just tap my desk during class if I start again.”

Lexa just kept staring until the professor started talking and then she just nodded her head and began taking notes.

Clarke could not concentrate on what was being said, so she began to draw on her notebook hoping that class would go by faster if she kept her mind busy. 

She was so concentrated that she jumped and dropped her book when Lexa tapped her desk. She looked up and saw the professor watching her. She mouthed the word sorry to him as Lexa went to pick up her book.

“Thanks and sorry about that.” She went to take her book from Lexa who was looking at her drawings, she just looked from the book to Clarke and handed it over after a couple of seconds of this.  
Lexa nodded and went back to taking notes. Clarke studied the girl next to her, she was surprised she hadn’t gotten yelled at again. 

 

Lexas Pov  
The class had been filling up fast so she put her bag in the seat next to her, not wanting to chance that the seat would be taken by anyone other than Clarke. She had to keep her grades up and knew that her grade was now very connected to Clarkes.

When the girl came Lexa moved her bag and just tried to focus on the professor, But there Clarke went again with the shaking, Lexa waited a bit hoping the girl would recognize what she was doing so Lexa wouldn’t have to alert her to it. How was she supposed to concentrate with the shaking? So she tapped Clarkes desk as the blonde had told her to do causing the girl to drop her book. Lexa sighed reaching for the book that was close to her.

She went to hand it to Clarke when she saw all of the drawings, there was a tree, and the stars. These weren’t just normal doodles, they were beautiful. She looked back at the blonde who had her hand out, and she couldn’t believe that these came from her hands.

She handed the book over and began taking her notes again. When Professor Kane announced that class was over she packed her things and made her way to the door without acknowledging Clarke. But then she felt an arm grab her shoulder.

She spun around ready to yell at whoever touched her and saw Clarke holding out her arm towards Lexa. That’s when she realized the girl was talking to her.

“Hey sorry, you left your gloves last class, and I forgot until right now that I had them.”

Lexa studied Clarke noting her eyes again which showed everything Clarke felt, which seemed to be nervous once again.

“Thank you Clarke.” And with that she took the gloves and walked away from the other girl.

**** Later that Day*****  
Lexa was in bed, thinking about her girlfriend. She missed her so much, she hadn’t spoken to Costia in so long. 

She decided to try and change that so she called her, but there was no answer. That seemed to be the usual these days. She decided to text her to see if that would make a difference.

Lexa: Hey, I miss you. Call me <3 

She almost didn’t press send, it wasn’t like her to be emotional, but it was Costia so she pressed send anyway.

Lexa went through her bag picking up the gloves that Clarke had given to her, she should try to be nicer to the girl who apparently was constantly nervous according to her leg shaking. Lexa didn’t want to be forced to work with her the rest of the semester but she had no choice, she only hoped the girl took it seriously. Lexa didn’t think she would though because the blonde hadn’t even taken any notes during class, but had chosen to draw the whole time.

Lexa took out her syllabus, there was paper coming up, they were supposed to choose a relationship to study, each partner was to choose one person from the relationship and study their point of view. Lexa sighed, they would need to discuss that next class in order to begin.

Her phone rang once signaling a message. Lexa frowned at what she saw appear in her screen.

Costia: Me too.

That’s it that’s the response she got, no phone call or anything that would begin a conversation or show that Costia was open to having one.  
Lexa didn’t know what to say so she just began to wonder how they had gotten to this place in their relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you guys think in the comments. Hope you enjoyed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this chapter... Italicized is flashbacks!

Lexa and Costia had known each other since they were fifteen. They had been best friends for three before they decided to take it the next level.

_Lexa was sitting on her couch watching old reruns of Charmed with her best friend. They were cuddling as they always did, Lexa mindlessly curling Costias hair around her finger. She looked over at her best friend, her heart began to beat faster the more she watched her._

_“Lexa, the show is on the television, not my face.” She said smiling while bumping her shoulder into Lexas._

_Lexas face turned very red from embarrassment, she tried to cover her ears so Costia wouldn’t see. She got up to go get a drink, and when she returned she made sure to put more space between herself and the other girl. That did not last long._

_Costia just moved closer to Lexa once again grabbing Lexas arm and putting it around her shoulders. Lexa sighed, she was trying to give herself space from her best friend. Their other friends had begun to make comments on how close they always were. Lexa had not yet told anyone that she was gay, not even Costia._

_When she told Costia she didn’t want the girl to think about all the times like this where they were just relaxed, and see it as if Lexa had been taking advantage of her. So Lexa once again removed her arm from around Costia and brought her legs up onto the couch wrapping her arms around them._

_Costia looked over confused, Lexa saw and just shrugged in response, turning her attention back to the show._

_“Lexa?” Lexa looked up and saw Costia was watching her, she slightly nodded her head so that Costia could keep talking._

_“Are you upset with me? Did I do something wrong?”_

_“No, why would you think that?” Lexa knew she had been physically pulling herself away from her friend but nothing else had changed and she didn’t think Costia had really noticed it anyway._

_“You have been acting strange, you keep pulling away from me, I mean you’re here, but not like you usually are, you are always thinking and moving away.” Is it because of everyone teasing us about each other?”_

_Lexa took a deep breath and put on her mask, which Costia saw right away._

_“Oh no don’t you use that face with me.” She grabbed Lexas shoulders and shook a little. “I’m your best friend, you don’t get to cover what you really feel with me!”_

_Lexa looked down trying to relax herself. “She kept looking down thinking about what she should say next while Costia waited._

_With a determined face on now Lexa raised her eyes, “It is not what they say that bothers me, I think I do like girls, and I wanted to tell you, but then they started talking and I didn’t want you to think I was using you or anything.”_

_Lexa waited for a response, waited for Costia to get up and walk away. Instead the other girl was just studying her again. Lexa felt her ears going warm again._

_Costia moved closer to her, when Lexa almost moved away again Costia grabbed her arm. “Do you like me more than a friend Lexa?”_

_Lexas heart was beating so loud that she swears Costia could see it if she tried, Lexa didn’t say anything, just stared blankly at her bestfriend._

_Costia sighed and brought her other hand over Lexas heart, Lexa knew she felt how fast it was beating. Lexa began to look everywhere but at Costia, trying to figure out what she felt in the short amount of time. She closed her eyes trying to tune out Costia._

_When she thought she was relaxed enough to answer the question she opened her eyes and saw that Costia had moved even closer only about 6 inches between their faces. Lexa went to move back, having Costia so close to her was confusing._

_But then Costia grabbed Lexas neck and closed the distance between their lips. Lexa froze shocked but then relaxed when she felt the softness of the other girls lips on hers for the first time. The kiss was soft questioning, but once Costia felt Lexa kiss her back it intensified._

_Costia licked Lexas lip asking for entrance, and when Lexa opened her mouth in answer the kiss deepened, both girls exploring each other in a new way._

_When they finally broke away, Costia leaned her forehead on Lexas and just whispered, “I like you too.”_

Lexa layed in bed her alarm having gone off at 6:30 Am so that she would have to time to run and shower before class. It had been three years since her and Costias first kiss, she wondered if Costia remembered. Lexa missed Costia, but more as her best friend now than her girlfriend.

They had only been dating almost a year when they separated for college. They had sworn up and down that they would make it, that distance would never be a problem for two people who were meant to be.

Lexa rolled out of bed and began to change her clothes. Runs helped her wake up, made her feel like mornings had a reason.

She always did the three mile loop around campus, which took about 20-30 minutes depending on how fast she decided to run. Today it took extra-long, Lexa just wasn’t into it, her mind always returning to Costia.

When she got back to her room it was almost seven. She ran into the shower try to fast and efficient. She began to think about the paper she had to talk to Clarke about trying to decide on which characters she would like to write about.

She began dressing for class and made it there at 7:55, she went to grab two empty seats when she heard her name being called.

“Lexa!” It was Clarke, who apparently had gotten there before Lexa could. She made her way over to the girl and sat down.

“Good morning.” Lexa looked up seeing the girl was trying to make peace. She cocked her head to side and looked at Clarke questioningly who began to fidget under Lexas watchful eyes.

“Good morning ClarKe.” Lexas eyes widened at the way she said the girls name, it sounded off to her, but she couldn’t figure out why.

Clarke just smiled in return and began to listen to what professor Kane began lecturing about.

Lexa could not concentrate and she couldn’t figure out why. So she began to doodle in her notebook, infinity sign after infinity sign. The she realized she needed to talk to Clarke about the paper, so she grabbed a blank piece of paper and wrote the blonde a note.

Clarkes POV

This was the first class that Clarke had been able to concentrate. She was finally getting into this class it was interesting,

A paper was suddenly thrust onto her book, she looked up and glared at Lexa who simply pointed to the paper.

Clarke looked down and read the paper.

“We have a paper coming up, we need to talk about it later on.”

Clarke wrote back,“When are you free?”

Lexa looked at the paper and took a moment to think. “Not until later tonight, I have classes and practice.”

Clarke took the paper, trying to contemplate how she wanted to do this. She sighed and wrote her number on the paper. “Text me when you get out of class so we can meet up.”

Lexa read what Clarke wrote and nodded her head, taking her phone out to save Clarkes number.

Clarke went back to taking notes until Kane announced it was the end of class. Clarke looked over and saw Lexas blank page. Lexa began to pack her things to go.

“Hey, take my notes and copy them.” Clarke extended her book to Lexa who just looked at the book and back to Clarke assessing the situation. Clarke took another step towards Lexa and shaking her book at the other girl. “You can give it back when we meet up for the paper.”

Lexa took the book from Clarke and just nodded before making her way out of the room.

Clarke walked out to see Finn watching Lexa walk away from the room. She stopped to study him, to see if his face revealed anything, but he just shook his head in her direction, and turned to see Clarke watching him.

“Good morning! I’m starving lets go.”

He put his arm around her shoulder and began leading them in the opposite direction of Lexa. “That girl you were watching, do you know her?” His arm tensed for a second before relaxing on her shoulder again.

“No, why?”

“That’s Lexa the partner from hell. Were you checking her out?” She was teasing him, she knew he wasn’t.

“Hell no, she has pure bitch face, not my type of girl at all. Besides why look at other girls when I have you?”

Clarke tensed up. “Don’t talk about her like that, you don’t even know her right? Besides she may have a mean face on all the time but her eyes are beautiful.” She didn’t mean to add that last part it just kind of slipped out. It even shocked her, she knew she noticed Lexas eyes but christ, she didn’t know she liked them that much until she said it.

She looked over at Finn who was looking at her with question in his eyes, she just shrugged in response. “Just don’t talk about people you don’t know.”

“Right, okay babe. What do you want to eat?”

*** Lexas POV***

Lexa was exhausted! Practice had been brutal, Indra must have been in a bad mood or something because she hadn’t worked them out that hard in ages. It was now 5:30 and she needed to get some work done.

She grabbed her bag and pulled out her notebook, along with Clarkes. Flipping through the pages noticing that Clarkes book had more art than notes. She was actually really talented. Lexa went through every page of the notebook more than once before she actually started to take notes.

After she was done copying the notes she decided to text the other girl to figure out when they were going to get together for the paper.

Lexa: This is Lexa. When are you free to work on the paper?

She put her phone down, thinking about going to shower when her phone rang almost right away.

Clarke: Are you free now?

Lexa: Its Friday night you don’t plan on drinking and going out to another party?

Clarke: I wasn’t drinking that night, and no I rather get some work done, so are you?

Clarke: Free I mean.

Lexa rolled her eyes, she really did want to shower and watch Netflix the rest of the night, but finishing that paper as soon as possible sounded good.

She figured if she told Clarke to meet her in thirty minutes she would have enough time to shower.

Lexa: Meet at 7 in main library?

Clarke: See you there.

Lexa got up and went to shower groaning about how sore she was the whole time, secretly hating Clarke for every movement she made, she could be showering to go to bed instead of the stupid library.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear we are getting somewhere. Next chapt is done, will be posted on Monday. Its super cute. Thanks for reading <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like this chapter alot Im not sure why lol

Clarke got to the library five minutes early. She didn’t want to make things worse with Lexa by being late. She took out her phone to let the other girl know she was there, but when she looked up she saw Lexa sitting at another table not too far, studying something intently.

She was watching her from a distance, she liked seeing the concentration in Lexas face. Clarke tried to see what Lexa was looking at when she realized it was her notebook. Lexa was flipping through all of the pages and her hand was tracing things on every couple of pages.

Clarke felt anger rise in stomach. That was an invasion of privacy, she gave Lexa her book for the notes only. Clarke got up and started stomping her way over to Lexa who was too focused on the art to notice Clarke standing in front of her.

“You were only supposed to copy the notes.”

Clarke noticed Lexas little jump when the she spoke, Clarke put her hand out for Lexa to give her the notebook.

Lexa simply stared at her hand, and then looked back down at the book and flipped the pages a couple of times ignoring Clarkes hand.

“Lexa give me my book.”

Clarke was seriously starting to get pissed off, who did this girl think she was? She closed her eyes trying to breathe in order to calm herself down when she felt the book being placed in her hand.

“Your artwork is very good Clarke.”

Clarke opened her eyes to snap at Lexa for being an ass, and making fun of her work. But when she saw Lexas face she knew that Lexa was giving her honest opinion. She wasn’t giving Clarke her signature bitch face, which she appreciated.

“Thanks, but you weren’t supposed to see those,” She said as she sat down across from the brunette. Clarke felt her anger dissipate the longer she looked at Lexa who began going through her bag to grab her own notebook.

“Ok so about this paper, We need to find a relationship to study between two different people, do you have any idea what two people would interest you enough to write about?”

Clarke barely heard what Lexa said, she was too busy studying the girls movement and face when she talked. What was up with that she thought shaking her head in order to focus.

“Do you want a friendship or a relationship?”

Clarkes eyes widened at Lexa, and she turned bright pink.

“What!?”

Lexa looked up at her with a confused face. “What kind of relationship do you want to study Clarke, a friendship or a relationship?”

“Oh, umm how about neither. I was thinking about Julius Caesar and Brutus. A friendship gone wrong I guess.”

Clarke watched Lexa think it over for a minute. The brunette finally looked up and nodded her head once. “Only if I get to write about Brutus.”

“Why do you want to write his perspective?”

“I think it is interesting how life decisions, what is best for a lot of people can force someone to do something they never thought they would, or never wanted to do.”

She liked the way Lexa thought. “Alright then. We should get started.” Both girls began writing in their notebooks, it took entirely way too long. Clarke was exhausted.

When she was finished she looked up saw Lexa was on her phone, “You finished already?”

Lexa looked up and nodded. Clarke went to reach for the other girls book, when Lexa caught her wrist before she could take it. Clarkes heart began to beat way too fast, pounding in her chest.

Lexa was glaring at her again though. She released Clarkes wrist and Clarke pulled it away, shaking her head. “What is your problem? I just wanted to see what you wrote.”

“Why do you need to see it Clarke?”

“Well maybe because this is a partner paper, and we should make sure we are both putting in the correct amount of work that needs to be done to get a good grade. I rather you not bring my GPA down.”

Clarke watched Lexas face while she talked and saw the quirk in her lip that seemed like Lexa almost smiled, or whatever that was.

“If anyone GPA is going to be brought down by this partnership, I can assure you that it won’t be yours.”

With that being said Lexa grabbed Clarkes book before Clarke could react, Clarke was ready to yell at her when Lexa looked up from Clarkes book and simply handed her own over to the blonde.

Clarke eyed the brunette who seemed to be playing with her, she began reading what was written down though and her anger just increased.

“Wait a minute you applaud that Brutus was able to find the strength to kill his friend? The man he was supposed to be loyal too?"

Lexa looked up, “Yes he did what had to be done to protect their people, he showed true strength, he made the decision with his head and not his heart that is what makes a good leader Clarke.”

Clarke just shook her head at the other girl. “I know he did what he had to but, I don’t know, there could have been another way maybe.”

“If killing one man could save hundreds of your friends and family would you not do it Clarke, if hurting one could save so many others is it not worth it?”

Clarke thought about it for a minute, Lexa simply watched her and waited for an answer. “I would do what I must for my family and friends, but I wouldn’t like it.”

Lexa nodded in response, “You don’t have to like it to do it, you do it because you have to and deal with the consequences it will have on you later.”

Lexa started going through Clarkes notebook again as if Clarke hadn’t asked her not to already before. Lexa looked up and saw Clarke watching her, she shrugged, “I have seen it all already Clarke. Just let it go.”

Clarke hmmed in response and began going through Lexas notebook trying to see if she found something to hold over the girl before her. Only thing she noticed really was that Lexas handwriting wasn’t as neat as she thought it would be and the girl liked infinity symbols, except all of them were broken.

“Whats up with all of the broken infinity symbols?”

Lexa looked up and her mask went back up, at least that’s what it was starting to seem like to Clarke, that Lexa had a mask on to hide what she was really thinking or feeling from everyone. She saw through it though. “Calm down, I’m just curious, don’t answer if you don’t want to.”

Lexa got up and began packing her stuff to leave. Clarke shook her head at the other girl but began to grab her stuff too. “I’m tired Clarke we can go over the rest of this through text if we need to.”

Clarke nodded her head, “Whatever you say commander.”

Lexa stopped moving and stared at Clarke waiting for an explanation. Clarke was nervous again, she didn’t mean to say that out loud, it was pure word vomit.

“Ummm, you're just very commanding, and bossy. So commander.”

“I am not bossy.”

Clarke laughed at Lexas serious face  that soon turned into a pout and began walking away, she was going to like teasing her. “Text me about the papers when you get a chance commander.”

Lexa only rolled her eyes in response.

**Lexas POV**

Lexa knew she was bossy, but she just didn’t like that Clarke pointed it out to her. Lexa opened her phone and went through her pictures, when Clarke wasn’t looking Lexa snapped a picture of her favorite one of Clarkes drawings, a tree that reached sky, ground meeting sky. She didn’t know why she did it she just knew she would want to look at it again.

Lexa began the long walk back to her room, thinking about the annoying blonde who maybe wasn’t as annoying as she originally thought. When the girl relaxed she was okay to be around. And her paper was good, really good actually, so there went all the dumb blonde jokes Lexa was hoping to use when telling Raven about Clarke.

Lexa made it back to her room and threw herself onto her bed, quickly putting pajamas on when there was knock on her door, she couldn’t help but groan in protest. But went to open the door anyway to see none other than her brother standing in front of her.

“Lincoln,” she said turning around walking back towards her bed. She layed down and stared at ceiling waiting for him.

“Alexandria,” he said smirking and making his way over to his sister. He layed down next to her and stared at the ceiling too.

Lexa smacked his arm, “Don’t call me that!”

He chuckled in response

“What brings you here?” She turned to watch him.

He sighed, “I think I’m in love.”

Lexa rolled her eyes, “Lincoln! With who? When did you even meet someone? You were here last weekend at a party very much single.”

“I met her officially at the party, you know her.” Lexa raised an eyebrow at him, and waited for him to go on. “Its Octavia Blake.”

“No no no, not Blake anyone but Blake! She so chipper and happy all the time, its exhausting! Just thinking about how energetic she is makes me more tired.” Lexa knew she was being dramatic when she covered her eyes and feigned to begin falling asleep.

Lincoln just laughed in response and bumped her shoulder with his. “Shut up Lexa, shes not bad, and she makes me happy.”

Lexa peeked between her fingers at her brother who did seem to be happier. “Fine she said,” covering her eyes once again, “if she hurts you though, I will kill her.”

He wrapped his arm around his sisters shoulder, “I know you will. But I want you to get to know her better, I am supposed to go out with her and her roommate tomorrow to the movies and arcade. Come with me Lex. Please.”

Lexa looked at her brother, they may have not been blood related but she loved him very much and if Blake made him happy then she would try for his sake to play nice.

“Fine. Now go away I’m tired.”

He laughed again getting up, “I’m only letting you get your beauty sleep, so you’re not grumpy and extra ugly tomorrow.” With that he ran to the door, the pillow Lexa threw hitting the door as he closed it fast.

“YOU'RE ANNOYING.” She yelled after him and then went to bed thinking about how she had to play nice tomorrow, which she hated.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lexa needs people she can count on guys and I love to see her relaxed.  
> Next Chapter should be up Wednesday night with lots of Clexa interaction :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saturday night, Movies and Arcade, a tiny tiny bit if info is told about Batman Vs Superman warning, nothing major just a little scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter I have ever written but I loved it.

** Clarkes POV**

Clarke and Octavia began getting ready for their day with Lincoln.

Clarke thought Lincoln was nice but didn’t understand why Octavia wanted her third wheeling today, if they started making out during the movie she swore she was going to kill her. She could ask Finn to go maybe, only so she had a slight distraction, but did she want Lincoln to know she was with Finn? What if he knew about Raven?

“Do you mind if I invite Finn along?” Clarke asked while combing her hair.

Octavia froze for a second in putting her boots on. “Um it might be awkward if you did.”

Clarke makes a face confused. “How would that be awkward?” Did Octavia know about Finn and Raven? Clarke felt anger rising about the possibility of her best friend keeping that kind of secret from her. “Answer me Octavia.” She said through clenched teeth.

Octavias eyes widened, “So I didn’t tell you this because I knew you’d say no, but um Lincoln wants me to try and get along with his sister so he invited her, and you are my family here so I want you to come and support me. Plus you know her already so you might be able to help me get her to not hate me.” Octavia took in a deep breath after her nonstop talking.

“Wait Lexa is going to be there?! Octavia I was just with her yesterday!”

“Yeah... But I need you, please come Clarke. Please! I will owe you big time!” she said this clasping her hands in front of Clarke.

Clarke started walking around thinking, she didn’t want Lexa to know about Finn, she didn’t want her to see her as the other woman who broke her friend’s heart. Crap what was she going to do?

“Does Lincoln know me and Finn are a thing?”

“I mean he saw you together at the party I guess but we weren’t exactly paying attention to you two. He only saw him right when you left I think. Wait why does that matter?”

“Don’t let him find out about it. I don’t want Lexa to know.”

“You’re confusing me, why are you keeping your boyfriend a secret? Why does Lexa matter when it comes to Finn?

Clarke sat down and explained what she found out at the party to Octavia. She saw the changes in Octavias body as she talked.

“That son of a bitch!! Who does he think he is? When I get my hands on him I will kill him Clarke. You deserve better and so does that other girl!”

Clarke just waited for her friend to finish putting the pieces together.

“Wait why are you still with him? Are you an idiot? Do I need to kick your stupid ass too?” Octavia began walking towards Clarke like she was really going to hit her.

Clarke put her hands up in a surrender motion. “Look I don’t know, I really did like him, I don’t know if I do still, but he’s a nice distraction, I’m not in love with the boy O. Just, I am going to figure out what I want to do but until then, let’s not give Lexa reasons to hate me. So that favor, I’m cashing it in now. Lexa cannot know about Finn which means Lincoln can’t either.”

“You’re asking me to lie to my boyfriend, you know that right?” Octavia crossed her arm over her chest.

“I know, but please O.”

There was a knock on the door. Octavia looked up a smile automatically appearing on her face until she looked back at Clarke.

“Please.”

“Figure your shit out Griffin, I won’t keep your secret for long.”

Octavia walked to the door and was automatically enveloped in Lincolns muscular arms once she opened it.

He let go of Octavia and looked at Clarke. “Ready to have fun?”

She glared at him for a second, “Where’s Lexa?” His eyes widened and he looked at Octavia.

“You told her?” He looked back at Clarke, “Sorry this one was scared you would of said no. Lexa doesn’t know that it’s you either just so you know.”

Clarke face palmed. Lexa did not seem like the kind of person who liked surprises. “I swear if this makes things worse between me and her both of you will pay. Where is she?”

“Waiting in the car.” Lincoln said looking down at his feet like a kid in trouble.

“Well lets go then.” She picked up her phone and quickly wrote Lexa a text.

Clarke: I didn’t know until now, don’t blame me.

She grabs her coat and walks out following behind Octavia and Lincoln shaking her head at what the next couple of hours will bring.

**Lexas POV**

She was already grumpy, sitting in the back seat of the car so that Octavia could sit next to Lincoln. Step one in playing nice for Lincolns sake.

She pressed her head against the window when her phone rang once alerting het to the text message. She took her phone out surprised to see a text from Clarke. Her heart skipped a beat which confused her along with the message.

She began to type out her confusion when the car door was opened and she saw the Blonde right in front of her, giving her a little smile.

Lexa looked up at Lincoln, “Wait what is she doing here?” She turned back to Clarke who was getting into the car making Lexa scoot in to get out of her way. “Wait you're Blakes roommate?”

“Yes, nice to see you too Lexa.” Clarke rolled her eyes and Lexa just shrugged in response watching Clarke get comfortable. Clarke looked simple but still very pretty. Lexa realized she was staring when Clarke looked back at her, Lexa focused on Clarkes eyes, they reminded her of the sky. Clarke blushed and looked away from her. Lexa turned her attention forward and caught Lincoln’s eyes in the mirror, he was laughing at her chuckling lightly.

Lexa felt herself going red and kicked the back of his chair, which only made him laugh harder.

“Shut up and drive Lincoln.” She was giving him one of her looks and it worked, he choked down the rest of his laughter and began to drive them to their destination. They both got confused looks from Octavia and Clarke who just shrugged at each other in response.

There was kind of an awkward silence happening and everyone could feel it. Lexa didn’t really care though she just kept looking out the window, randomly stealing looks to see that Clarke was doing the same.

“So, how’s that paper you guys are working on going? Is the class pure hell?” Octavia obviously couldn’t handle the silence Lexa rolled her eyes at the window.

“It’s good I like the class so far, and Lexa is a beautiful writer.” Lexa turned around to look at Clarke suspiciously, to see if she was making fun of her but she seemed to be genuine so she just nodded her head in response. Not turning away from Clarke to see if she would say anything else.

“Yeah she’s always liked to write, even when we were younger she used to keep journals, its how I found out she was into girls. She used to, OW!! What the hell Lexa!?

Lexa was just glad they were at a red light when Lincoln was talking or she wouldn’t have been able to slap his head as hard she did to get him to shut up.

“You talk too much about things you don’t know little brother.” She settled back into her seat, avoiding Clarkes gaze which she felt almost as if the other girl was touching her.

“Little brother? Really? You are literally only three months older than me. Plus I’m bigger than you.”

“Your size matters little considering I can kick your ass anytime I want to.” Lincoln didn’t say anything knowing that she was probably right which only caused Octavia to begin giggling and Clarke to full out laugh.

Lexa liked the sound of Clarkes laugh, she watched her continue to laugh with a small smile on the corner of her lips.

** Calrkes POV**

Almost the whole car ride Clarke couldn’t stop herself from sneaking peaks at Lexa, why couldn’t she pull her eyes off of her for more than a few seconds at a time? She did learn something interesting though. Lexa was into girls, very interesting actually.

Were her and Raven a thing now? She didn’t like that idea though for some reason so she pushed it to the side.

They got to the movie theater early to see Batman Vs Superman, it being opening weekend they didn’t want to take any chances. They sat at a table once they got their tickets. Octavia and Lincoln declared that they were going to get snacks. They began walking away from her and Lexa, Lincoln absentmindedly rubbing where Lexa had hit him, making Clarke chuckle again.

She looked over to see Lexa watching her intently green eyes focused.

“I’ve never seen eyes like yours before.” Clarke closed her mouth tightly, there she went with the word vomit again. What the hell was up with that?

Lexa just tilted her head in response to one side. Clarke just shrugged in response, pulling a pen from her bag and a napkin from the table and began drawing.

She felt Lexa move closer to her to see what she was drawing, it made her skin tingle knowing that Lexa was closer to her than she had ever been, but it also made her nervous, she messed up her drawing. She huffed and crumpled it, looking up at Lexa who had that little pout she saw before.

“Why did you crumble it? “

Clarke shrugged, “I messed up its ruined.”

Lexa moved back, moving quickly to grab the crumpled napkin that Clarke had on the table. Clarkes eyes narrowed at Lexa in annoyance. Lexa just unrumpled it and studied it for a while meeting Clarkes eyes over the napkin.

“Just because something doesn’t turn out the way you want doesn’t mean its ruined.”

Clarke just stared. Who talks like that?

Lexa got up turned away from Clarke and began walking to the ticket collector. Clarke just sat there watching her, there was something about Lexa she couldn’t put her finger on but it intrigued her. She jumped up and tried to run after the other girl tripping in the process, she heard a giggle from behind her and turned to see Octavia and Lincoln. Octavia was giggling while Lincoln had a small frown on his face.

Clarke just stuck her middle finger up to O and made her way next to Lexa.

The movie was good but Clarke had never seen the Superman movie, she had questions that needed answers. She looked to ask Octavia but it seemed her and Lincoln weren’t watching. She sighed and shifted in her seat to be as far away from them as possible which brought her closer to Lexa.

She watched Lexa, who was so focused a bomb could go off and she didn’t think she would notice. Clarke moved in closer to whisper her question to Lexa who jumped when she felt Clarkes breath on her ear spilling some popcorn on the floor.

“Shit, what do you want Griffin?”

Clarke glared at her in response. Turning back to movie, shifting away from Lexa who was watching her with a glare of her own.

About two minutes passed when she felt Lexa tug on her sweater to get her attention, Clarke turned and Lexa just waited. Clarke sighed annoyed with the girl sitting next to her but decided to ask anyway because she was confused. She moved closer to Lexa so she could whisper.

“Why does Batman hate him so much?”

“He blames him for the people that died in his building from the beginning of the movie.”

Clarke tried to show her confusion with her face. “But he was trying save the world, right.” He did what he had to for the greater good.”

Lexa moved in closer now only inches away from her, “You are starting to think like a leader Griffin.” She had a slight smile on her lips.

Clarke was focused on Lexas lips the whole time she was talking.

“Will you two be quiet, trying to watch over here.” Lincoln was glaring at Lexa who only tilted her head in confusion before moving away from Clarke and focusing in on the movie once again.

Clarke saw Lincoln shake his head in Lexas direction, he caught her eyes and he frowned shaking his head at her now too.

What’s his problem she thought, he wasn’t even focused on the movie last time she saw.

The movie finished without any other interruption, Clarke kept her questions to herself. She went with O to use the bathroom. They were washing their hands when O said “Thanks for coming, I think Lexa is less bitchy around you for some reason, or maybe she’s just nicer around Lincoln, but thanks.”

Clarke nodded and made her way back out while Octavia fixed her hair and makeup when she heard Lincoln trying to yell quietly at his sister. Clarke started to walk faster to figure out what was wrong.

“Don’t act dumb Lexa you know what I’m talking about.” Lincoln looked up then and saw Clarke walking towards them, he just huffed and walked away. Clarke could see the tension in Lexas back, it scared her to see the other girl so visibly trying to hold in her anger.

**Lexas POV**

Clarke and Octavia went into the bathroom when Lincoln grabbed her arm.

She pulled it out of his grasp, “What the hell is your problem Lincoln?”

“You know what my problem is, do you like Clarke?”

Lexas eyes widened in response, “Are you fucking serious Lincoln? I’m here because you asked me to be, I’m playing nice because you asked me too and now that’s a problem?!”

He glared at her with intensity, “You’re only playing nice with Clarke, what the hell is that? You forget you have a girlfriend or something?”

Lexa shoved Lincoln away from her, “Don’t you dare make it seem like I have done something to betray Costia! I barely know Clarke, I have done nothing but attempt to be friendly for your sake.”

“Don’t act dumb Lexa you know what I’m talking about!” Lexa saw Lincoln look up in recognition before walking away. Her heart was beating so hard, she wanted to break something. How dare he? He knew nothing. She was his sister anyway not Costia, it didn’t matter how close the three had grown up together he should care more about her feelings anyway. She never told anyone except Raven about how little she and Costia talked anymore, but Lexa would never betray the girl, she knew that. Clarke Griffin was just her class partner.

At this thought she felt a hand on her back, she jerked away from the hand turning to see the very Clarke Griffin standing in front of her.

“What do you want?” She said as rudely as she possibly could.

Clarke just looked hurt at Lexas outburst. Lexa felt a pang of guilt but shook it off putting on her blank face, waiting for an answer.

Clarke shook her shoulders and glared at her,” I saw you fighting with Lincoln and wanted to make sure you were okay, don’t be an ass to me because of it.”

Lexas eyes widened, no one besides her brother ever had the guts to talk to her that way, she quickly changed her face back. “Maybe you should mind your business.” And with that she turned around and began walking after Lincoln.

Lexa was too mad to see anyone else at the moment so instead of going towards the arcade across from the movie theater in the mall she decided to walk around a bit, thinking over about how she had been acting with Clarke. She could admit that she watched the other girl more than necessary but that was it. She had done nothing that would insinuate that she was interested in her. She huffed in annoyance. Lincoln was just paranoid.

Lexa took out her phone and called Costia to try and calm herself down. Costia picked up right before Lexa almost gave up.

“Babe! It’s been so long since we have spoken! How are you?”

Lexa could feel herself getting lighter hearing Costias voice, it had been so long since they had spoken.

“It’s been almost two weeks Cos, I can’t not talk to you for that long, and I miss you.”

“I miss you more, are you okay? You sound off?” Lexa sighed Costia was able to read her better than anyone.

“No just had a fight with Lincoln, he’s being stupid.”

“Oh I miss him too! I haven’t spoken to him in like a month, but you know he’s probably just doing what he feels is best. Don’t worry about it too much, and tell him I say hi.”

Lexa felt a little better, especially knowing she would see Costia next weekend when she came to visit.

“I can’t wait to see you.”

“Yeah Lex, I gotta go but I will text you okay? I love you bye.” And with that the line went dead. Lexas eyes widened as she took the phone from her ear. She was getting really tired of this. She started walking back towards the arcade.

She walked around until she saw Lincoln and the girls, she joined them without saying anything. She did notice the glares that Clarke was throwing her way but decided to ignore them, for now.

Lincoln looked at her and studied her face, she knew trying to figure out what she was thinking. “Where did you go?”

She looked at her brother, she knew that Costia was right, Lincoln only ever did the things he did out of love. She sighed, “I was talking to Costia, she misses you.”

“I miss her too.”

Blake glared at Lincoln a moment before turning to Lexa, “Who is Costia?”

Lexa rolled her eyes at Octavias obvious jealousy. “Costia is my girlfriend.”

Lincoln smiled at that answer and pulled Octavia towards him. Lexa turned to Clarke to apologize for her rudeness earlier when her phone rang once, she pulled it out to check.

Costia: Hey I forgot to mention I won’t be able to make it next weekend, sorry. <3

Lexa growled and was ready to fight Costia on this when Lincoln stuck his hand out to see her phone now standing in front of her in between her and Clarke. Lexa sighed and handed it over. Lincoln frowned when he read the message, “Sorry that sucks.” He looked down real quick, “Sorry about earlier I was out of line.”

Lexa studied him, she nodded at his apology, and held her hand out for her phone. He handed it back to her moving closer to whisper to her. “You better apologize to Clarke, I think she’s going to try and kill you. He stepped away from her, “I’m backing off now.” He walked away grabbing Octavia to follow him leaving the two girls alone.

Lexa was looking at her phone thinking of what to write back when she looked up and she saw a death glare from Clarke aimed directly at her. She stepped forward to speak to her but Clarke just took a step back which had her against some coin machine. Lexa raised an eyebrow at Clarke being stuck and took another step forward.

“Don’t even think about apologizing to me Woods, not going to happen.”

Lexa could see that Clarke was a stubborn girl and that just made this fun for her. She put her phone in her pocket, knowing that Clarke was watching her, she took another step forward, now only two feet separating them.

“Who said I was going to apologize?” Clarke tried to walk around her but she stepped in front of her again. Clarke rolled her eyes and went to move the other way, only to have her path blocked once again.

“Alexandria fucking Woods move out of my way before I freak out.”

Lexa grimaced at her name. She hated when people used her actual first name, “I’m sorry Clarke, I was upset with Lincoln and I took it out on you, it wasn’t fair. You are the princess of the sky and I a grounder who should know her place, will you forgive me? She pulled her arms behind her back and looked at the ground then back to Clarkes face trying to hide her smirk but hoping Clarke took the apology seriously.

She was getting kind of nervous waiting for a response. She was studying Clarkes face trying to see the emotion. She saw Clarke go from angry, doubtful, a big smile, to a wicked smile. She raised her brow at that one.

“I will forgive if and only if you give me all the tickets you win tonight.” Lexa rolled her eyes trying to hold back a smile. She stuck out her hand for Clarke to shake. Clarke grabbed her arm up to elbow though so Lexa did the same. She never showed her dorky side to anyone except the few people she kept close.  This was a big deal for her and she hoped Clarke recognized it.

She let go of Clarkes arm and put hers in her pockets, now feeling embarrassed about her apology, but Clarke just grabbed her arm and dragged her towards where Lincoln and Octavia were playing skee ball.

“Look at you two, made up already?” Lincoln laughed seeing Lexas discomfort.

“Lexa is the best apologizer I have ever met so yup couldn’t say no even if she deserved another hour of my attitude.” Clarke said grinning at her widely.

“You never forgive me that fast!” Octavia pouted and turned to Lexa. “Show me your ways because I will definitely piss her off soon enough.”

Lexa rolled her eyes at that. Maybe Octavia wasn’t too bad but she wouldn’t ever tell Lincoln that.

Lexa beat everyone at almost everything, even Lincoln at the punching game. By the end of the night Clarke had a ridiculous amount of tickets and teddy bear from the claw machine that she claimed Lexa had to give her because of their agreement.

Lexa just rolled her eyes and passed the bear to Clarke, she didn’t really want the damn thing anyway. She had remained pretty quiet the rest of the night except to boast about all of her winning. She did her best not to glare at their group, the hardest thing to do when hanging out with Octavia and Clarkes constant back and forth, and Lincoln and Octavias obsession with each other.

It was a good night in Lexas opinion a lot less annoying than she thought it would be. Her mood changed when she got home and remembered her last message from Costia though. She has begun wondering if Costia is cheating on her.  Her best friend/girlfriend wouldn’t do that to her though, right?

Lexa decided to text her back.

Lexa: We need to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think?! Come on guys we all know Lexa is secretly a dork and Clarke could never stay mad at her.
> 
> I might not update until Monday!! It's my birthday weekend!! Turning 22!! Lol if I have a chance I will write though Promise


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kicked out of class?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I updated later than I said I would, but with my birthday and catching up to school work I had no choice! Things should run more smoothly now!

**Clarkes POV**

She was sitting on the beach staring at the sky. She doesn’t remember getting there but apparently she did somehow.

“That’s Orions belt, its my favorite. One of  his stories says that he tried to pursue the Pleiades but Zeus didn’t approve so he turned them all into stars and to this day Orion is still chasing them across the sky. Guess we cannot always have what we want huh?” Clarke sighed.

“No we can’t and we just have to learn to deal with it, some things are just not meant to be.”

Clarke turned over trying to follow the voice, it was Lexa. She studied the way Lexa looked at the sky.

Clarke sat up, hovering over Lexa, she reached down and traced Lexas jaw, she swore it was made by Zeus himself. “Some things are meant to be though.”

Lexa turned and looked at Clarkes face, Clarke stared into those eyes, they were her new favorite color.

**Knocking**

“Clarke!!!!! Hello!!!! Wake up already!!”

Clarkes eyes snapped open and she half jumped half fell out of bed. She also managed to trip on her way to the door. She flung it open, “What the fuck Octavia you scared the shit out of me!? I was sleeping.”

Octavia walked past her and threw herself on her own bed. “Yeah I figured, I have called and texted you a million times, I didn’t have my keys, must of left them here yesterday when we left.”

Clarke just shook her head and made her way back over to her bed. She picked up her new teddy bear and studied it for a bit, she shrugged and got under her covers now cuddling the bear, ready to go back to sleep.”

She felt eyes on her though and knew Octavia was watching.

“Stop staring at me.” She rolled onto her to side to face the wall away from Octavia, but she still felt her staring.

“Clarke?”

“No.”

“I know why Lexa flipped on you.”

She contemplated ignoring Octavia and going to asleep, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to, curiosity always got the better of her. She groaned and turned over, opening her eyes waiting for the other girl to begin.

“Do you like girls Clarke?”

Clarkes eyes widened in response, definitely wasn’t expecting that.

“O, what? You know I have only been with guys. Besides I thought this was about Lexa?”

“It is.” Clarke crinkled her eye brows in confusion. Watching Octavia look around the room nervously. “Lincoln thinks you like Lexa.”

Clarke burst out laughing. “Wait what? I barely know Lexa! Yesterday was the first day we got along and even then we still had a fight. How could he think I liked her?”

Octavia was studying her, “You watch her Clarke, whenever she’s not looking at you, you rush to walk with her, and you always end up standing extremely close, like flirting close.”

Clarke was thinking about the day before, she could see what Lincoln did, but she was just friendly and always close to her friends, not that Lexa was a friend. Lexa was hot, who wouldn’t stare at her, even a gay guy could appreciate Lexa.

“He thinks she like you too, which is what he yelled at her about.” Clarkes stomach dropped, her heart started beating extremely fast and she felt her face growing hot. Did Lexa really like her? The idea made her smile a little until she saw O was still watching her. She shook her head no at the other girl.

“Didn’t Lexa say yesterday that she has a girlfriend?”

“She does…. You didn’t say you didn’t like her by the way.” O had a little smirk on her face. Clarke rolled her eyes.

“I am with Finn, and like you just said Lexa has a girlfriend, obviously we don’t like each other. Cant two hot girls get along without wanting to fuck each other?” With that she winked and turned back over pulling the bear close to her once again.

“Says the girl cuddling a stupid teddy bear, and hopefully you won’t be with Finn long anyway.”

Clarke ignored the comments and just shoved herself more under the covers trying to get away from Octavia’s annoying voice.

**Lexas POV**

She had to get up, it was seriously getting late, but her bed just felt so comfortable. Lexa knew if she didn’t get up at that moment that she wouldn’t make it to class. She sighed and rolled over.

It had been a long weekend, but a good one, she spent yesterday in bed, Raven came over and they just hung out. Saturday she spent with Lincoln and Clarke….

Lexa jumped out of bed at the thought of the Blonde. She had twenty minutes to get ready and make it to class which was a fifteen minute walk. She grabbed her phone to let the other girl know she was running late.

Lexa: Slept in be there a couple minutes late.

Clarke: I will save you a seat ;)

Lexa laughed at that text her stomach feeling warm.

Lexa: Like you have a choice.

She got dressed as fast as she could, throwing her hair up in a messy bun and putting her contacts in. She threw on skinny jeans and a school tshirt, throwing on her boots as she made her way to the door.

It was so damn cold outside she almost turned right back around, but she kept going anyway.

When she finally made it the classroom she looked around searching for Carke. It took her a minute to find the other girl because she was wearing a hat. Lexa arched an eyebrow it looked stupid from all the way back here.

She sat down next to the girl and looked at the hat. It was one of those animal hats that had the mittens all the way at the end. It was a raccoon. Clarke looked stupid.

Clarke looked up and smiled at her.

“You look ridiculous.”

Clarke eyes widened. She furrowed her brow and glared at Lexa.

“Hello to you too Rudolph.” Lexa frowned and touched the tip of her nose and just shrugged. She took out her notebook, Mr.Kane was off on some tangent but she could not concentrate, Clarke was swinging the damn mitten part of her hat around.

“Take the damn hat off Clarke, you're annoying me.”

Clarke glared at her watching Lexa as she continued to swing the mittens. Lexa was about to lose it, how can one person be so infuriating. She closed her eyes and began to count, that was until she felt something swing and hit her chest.

Her eyes snapped open to the Blonde whose eyes were watching her widely. Clarke snatched the mittens away and let them hang down, turning red and looking down at her book.

Lexa looked at her blank notebook, she couldn’t concentrate, she really didn’t want to be here. She rubbed her nose wondering if it was still red.

She looked over at Clarke who seemed to be falling asleep at her desk. Atleast she wasn’t the only one, Lexa put her head down, she was facing Clarke, who had most definitely fallen asleep. Her mouth was open, lexa grimaced at that wondering Clarke drooled a lot.

*Text message tone*

Both girls jumped at the sound of the phone, both of them scrambling to see if it was theirs. It wasn’t hers so Lexa relaxed as Clarke pulled her phone out shooting an apologetic face towards the professor. Lexa shook her head.

“Good job.” Clarke rolled her eyes and went through her phone.

Lexa was nosy, she knew she was so she subtly tried to see what Clarke was looking at. It was a message she couldn’t see who it was from only… miss you princess. Breakfast after class at… She rolled her eyes. She tried moving a little closer when all of a sudden she was on the ground.

She got up as fast as she could, her face turning red. Her eyes found the professors and she ducked her head down apologetically. But his eyes moved to Clarkes who Lexa noticed was dying of laughter, gasping for air.

“Ladies, is there something the whole class should know?”

Lexa sat down, “No sir, I just slipped sorry, please go on.”

He just looked at her and back to Clarke who was covering her mouth trying to muffle her sounds as tears ran down her face. He turned back to the board. Lexa kicked Clarke trying to get her to shutup already.

“Owww!” Clarke yelled.

“Ladies!! I think it would be best if you were to leave and come back Wednesday when you can concentrate and not be disruptive.”

Lexa just stared open mouthed at the professor and then to Clarke who was red in embarrassment, she got the point before Lexa did though and started packing her stuff up. Lexa put her stuff in  her bag but she was seriously waiting for the professor to say he was kidding. She had no choice but to get up when Clarke grabbed her bag from her and made her way outside.

Lexa got up and followed Clarke who kept walking with her bag.

“Give me my bag.”

The blonde kept walking which frustrated her. “Clarke.”

And still the other girl kept walking. Lexa was done she jogged the couple of feet separating them and snatched the bag from Clarke, making her face her in the process.

“The fuck Griffin?!”

Clarke pushed her into a wall getting all into her personal space. “That’s for kicking me you ass.”

Lexa was ready to flip out she grabbed the blonde flipping them and slammed her into the wall, but still making sure not to actually hurt the girl. “Don’t ever try that again Clarke. I don’t actually want to hurt you. You were laughing at me it was my reaction to kick you, you saw how I was with Lincoln Saturday.” She was inches away from Clarkes face staring into her eyes, pinning Clarkes arms to the side, she saw the blonde glance at her lips while she spoke.

She let go of her and started walking away, “So what that was you being nice?”

She turned and looked at the Blonde who rolled her eyes, ‘Doesn’t matter Clarke I won’t ever put my hands on you again.” Lexa walked away trying to clear her head.

She didn’t think Clarke would react that way to her. She didn’t actually hurt her when she kicked her, she knew that. She would of done it to Lincoln, Anya, and especially Raven too. She must of just gotten a little too comfortable with the blonde, well that ended now. She was such a drama queen, did she really think she could take Lexa? Delusional.

**Clarkes POV**

Clarke huffed as Brunette walked away her heart beating so fast. She never felt anything like that, when Lexa threw her to the wall and got all in her face. If she was being honest she found it to be very hot. She shook her head at the thought, it was freaking Lexa Woods she wouldn’t let her mind go there, hell Lexa was a girl and Clarke didn’t swing that way. But her body was still reacting.

Clarke walked towards her room replaying the scene in her head. _“Doesn’t matter Clarke I wont ever put my hands on you again.”_ Clarke pouted, shaking her head clear again. What the fuck was wrong with her?

“Princess!”

Those green eyes, so full of anger, and her lips so plump, Clarke couldn’t help but look at them while Lexa was talking, while Lexa was in control.  She felt a tug on her arm when she got in front of her door. She spun around to see Finn out of breathe.

“Finn what are you doing here?”

“You never texted me back I missed you, so decided to stop by and check in on you.” He leaned down and kissed her lips.

She kissed back quickly and moved away, but then she thought a second and pulled him in for more, she needed more. Clarke felt so hot and bothered all of a sudden. She needed release.

She kept kissing Finn, his lips were soft, she thought Lexas would probably be softer, the thought made her moan, which caused Finn to press into her. She felt his erection on her hip. They unceremoniously made it into her room closing the door behind them. Clarke laid on her bed beckoning Finn to come closer, she took off her shirt revealing her lace bra, erect nipples clearly visible.

He walked closer to her and just watched in awe waiting for her. She liked the way he looked at her. “Finn, control me.”

His eyes looked confused. “What do you mean princess?”

She rolled her eyes at the nickname, it was not what she wanted at the moment. “Control me.”

He just stared at her and then looked at the floor like a lost puppy, “I don’t understand.” Clarke sighed shaking her head, this isn’t what she wanted. She grabbed her shirt and put it on, seeing Finns obvious disappointment.

“I’m hungry lets go get something to eat.”

“What about? I mean I thought we were going to you know?”

Clarke rolled her eyes, god boys were so stupid and immature. “I’m not in the mood, lets go.” She closed her room door after he stepped out and pushed her forehead against it sighing, at the longing she still felt between her legs knowing she would have to take care of it later herself. She turned and started walking after Finn.

**Lexas POV**

Another day another practice. Lexa as always was exhausted. Physically and mentally, she had been going over what happened with Clarke that morning over and over again. Why was the girl so damn sensitive? Lexa couldn’t be around people like that, it drove her crazy, she wouldn’t apologize every five seconds for being herself. Hell no.

She closed her eyes trying to relax when her phone rang. It was Costia. Lexa sighed.

“Hello?”

“Babe, I’m sorry it took me so long to call, Ive just been busy.”

“Costia…. Its Monday night, I sent that text Saturday night, you're seriously telling me, you couldn’t have called me until now?”

“I told you I was busy. Whats going on?”

Lexa sighed loudly making sure Costia could hear it.

“Lexa spit it out, stop brooding.”

She rolled her eyes. “Cos, are we still together? Let me know now, just be clear, because I hate being in limbo like this.”

“Lexa we aren’t in Limbo! Of course we are together what are you even talking about?! You're my best friend, I can’t lose you. You're always there, you’re the only person in my life I know I can always on.”

“So why can’t I ever count on you? You disappear for days at a time but expect me to be there for you at a moment’s notice. That’s bull and you know it.”

Lexa heard some background noise now, sounded like giggling, she was seriously getting annoyed and then she heard Costias muffled voice, she was probably covering the mouth piece.

“Costia!!”

“Sorry babe, look I will try harder and do better, I promise…. But I kind of have to go. Don’t be mad okay? I love you.” Lexa was ready to yell ready to throw her phone across the room when she heard the beep indicating Costia had once again hung up on her.

There was only so much of this she could take, she loved Costia yes, she was he best friend, how was she supposed to let that go so easily? But Lexa wasn’t weak and she refused to let herself be that way, she would give Costia another chance to do better, but if she didn’t then she would be done.

Lexa got up and went to shower, stopping in front of the mirror to study her face. She knew she was hot, she wasn’t always though. God she went through the braces, glasses and acne faze all at once. But then she was finally old enough for contacts, and then pubertly stopped attacking her skin, her teeth were perfectly straight. That’s when her Costia started dating.

Lexa sighed, she wondered if Costia would still want her if she still looked like that. She shrugged probably not. Lexa would get hit on a lot when she went out, and people usually gave her second glances, but she was cold she knew how to push people away. It was better that way anyway, people were annoying just like Clarke Griffin.

She got in the shower and began to wash her hair still thinking. Maybe she should just stop trying to play nice with the girl it wasn’t getting her anything in return. Maybe she should just keep it strictly about school. Maybe Clarke Griffin wasn’t worth the effort.

 She went to bed and laid down when her phone buzzed. She groaned and looked at it.

Clarke: Sorry. See you Wednesday. Save you a seat :)

She stared at message confused, was this girl bipolar or what? She rolled over and closed her eyes trying to fall asleep.

**Clarkes POV**

She couldn’t fucking sleep it was driving her crazy. She tossed and turned grateful that Octavia was at Lincolns or she would of gotten yelled at for moving around so much. She couldn’t take it anymore, she laid on her back eyes closed. She knew what she needed.

Clarke lazily moved her hand up and down her chest going lower and lower each time until she reached the waist band of her shorts. She couldn’t tease herself anymore she needed it.

She dipped her fingers into her underwear and began rubbing circles, first soft and then slowly she got rougher and faster, she was panting, trying to be quiet. She closed her eyes trying to concentrate, taking her other hand and entering it into her shorts while the other was still hard at work.

She felt her wetness growing and growing, she dipped a finger in easily adding a second and began thrusting fast while rubbing her clit faster and faster. She was close, so close it was driving her crazy. She pictured herself being held against a wall with someone towering over her and it pushed her the little bit that she needed. She bit her lips trying silence the noises coming from her throat. She was panting as she came down from her high.

It felt so good, she sighed in relief as she got up to clean herself up real quick. She climbed into bed with a smirk on her face feeling so much better after being tense all day. She began drifting off while thinking of her fight with Lexa, maybe she had overreacted. She didn’t want to fight with her, there were seven weeks left to the class. She sighed and grabbed her phone, maybe she should make peace with the brunette.

Clarke: Sorry. See you Wednesday. Save you a seat :)

She put her phone down and rolled away from it smiling to herself, she could totally make things better with Lexa. She was stubborn like that, challenge accepted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think! Come on let me know in the comments! Pretty please :(


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its cute for a second and then not so much. Basically Finns an asshole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glad you guys are enjoying the story, hope this chapter gets your stamps of approval.

**Clarkes POV**

The next class day was uneventful, Lexa wouldn’t even look at her. This girl could really hold a grudge, Clarke found herself staring at her most of the time.

Class ended up going by really fast. She had decided to try and talk to Lexa once class finished and make the girl let things go. She put everything away but when she looked up Lexa was already halfway out the door.

“Lexa! Lexa! Seriously I know you hear me!”

She ran after her the other girl, which was difficult! Clarke Griffin does not run ever. She finally reached her and grabbed her by the arm.

“Do not touch me.” Lexa ripped her arm out of Clarkes grip. All of a sudden getting close to her, she couldn’t breathe again. But then Lexas name was being called, she turned to see where it was coming from, and saw Lexa visibly relax and step away. Clarke gasped for breathe seeing that girl Raven make her way towards them.

“Hey, you okay?” She put a hand on Lexas shoulder while studying Clarke. Clarke felt something weird happening in her chest watching Raven touch Lexa. She shook it off seeing the girl study her.

“And you are?”

“Clarke, Clarke Griffin.” Clarke stuck out her hand to shake.

Raven turned to Lexa searching her expression, Clarke saw Lexa nod very slightly, wondering why Raven was looking for permission.

“Raven Reyes, nice to meet you Clarke, Lexa has told me about you. You sound like a pain in the ass from what I have heard.” She laughed while shaking her hand.

“Lexa is one to talk, is she always so grumpy and mean?” Raven laughed making Clarke laugh too, she turned and saw Lexa glaring at her again.

“Yeah that’s just how she is, my little Lexi poo.” She put her arm around Lexa pulling her closer. Clarke felt the feeling in her chest again.

“If you call me that again and don’t remove your arm I will break it Reyes.” Clarke saw Raven pout at Lexa who had moved her glaring to the other brunette. Raven moved her arm while teasing Lexa still.

“Sorry babe forgot you only like cuddling when we are alone.” The feeling in her chest was seriously getting stronger, she had the urge to pull Lexa towards herself, but instead she just took a step closer.

Raven looked at Clarke when she finished talking and winked at her, then Lexa bopped her on the back of the head. “Shut up Raven or I will disown you.”

“You can’t hit a cripple Lexa, that’s so rude! And you can’t disown your best friend or who else will you talk to?” Lexa went to hit Raven again who went and hid behind Clarke grabbing her as a shield.

“Griffin get her! Call 911! Don’t just stand there she’s abusive!” Clarke couldn’t help but laugh at Raven antics. She reminded her of Octavia. They would totally get along.

“Enough Raven, I’m sure Clarke has somewhere to be, and I’m hungry, come on!” She moved around Clarke to grab Raven and begin pulling her away.

Raven was just laughing while she let Lexa pull her. Clarke turned ready to head back to her room.

“Hold on! Clarke, we are going to get food want to come?” She turned and saw Lexa shaking her head no at Raven who looked at her questioningly.  

Lexa wasn’t going to make being her friend easy but she had no choice in the matter as far as Clarke was concerned. Clarke walked over to Raven linking her arm through the other girls, maybe being friends with Raven could help her get closer to Lexa.

“I would love to eat with you Raven.” She turned and looked at Lexas surprised face and stuck her tongue out to the girl who just rolled her eyes in response.

Clarke saw that Raven was watching them with a little smirk. Raven was beautiful, she couldn’t understand how Finn would be stupid enough to hurt this girl. Clarke looked at the two friends as they walked. Raven was no Lexa though, she studied Lexas profile, moving to stand closer to her, not understanding why she felt the need to be closer.

**Lexas POV**

Raven was dead, or she would be as soon as they were alone. Lexa knew the blonde was trying to be nice to her, but Lexa was not so forgiving. She felt Clarke watching her throughout class and even on the walk to the dining room.

She didn’t understand why she was being so persistent. They just had to make sure they did their work for class that’s it. Lexa wasn’t paying attention to the conversation, she looked up trying to focus in.

“And then it went BOOM! And that’s how me and Lexa became friends, seventh grade science class. She pretended to hate me awhile but have you seen me I’m just loveable.”

Clarke started laughing loudly, making Lexa smirk slightly, the damn girl was contagious.

“So theres hope for me and Lexa then? I mean I like to think I’m loveable too, what do you think Lexa? Clarke turned to Lexa and pouted at her. Lexa focused in on Clarkes lips unconsciously licking her own. She shook her head and pretended to study the blonde, and then looked at Raven to compare who had moved closer to Clarke and imitated her face. She shrugged her shoulders, “Egh, I’m into brunettes.”

Raven full body laughed! “Sorry Clarke I have Lexas heart,” She then got up pecking a kiss onto her cheek. Lexa wiped it off right away making a disgusted face, seeing Clarke study her with a sad experession. “I’m gonna grab more food, be right back.”

It very quickly turned into an awkward silence, Lexa began playing with the food on her plate, hoping Raven would be back soon, she felt Clarke watching her again.

“Stop staring Clarke.” She looked up seeing the other girl blush.

“Lexa are we okay, I mean you never texted me back and if Raven hadn’t shown up I think you would of killed me. Come on you owe me I forgave you before, it’s your turn.”

Lexa studied her, she was being extra and she knew it, she had kicked Clarke first, she just didn’t know the blonde would take it to that level. She sighed making her decision.

“Then maybe we need to make a deal.”

She saw Clarke perk up at the idea, the light shining in her eyes. “What kind of deal did you have in mind?”

Lexa hadn’t gotten that far yet. She tilted her head to the side studying Clarke who began bouncing her leg up and down, Lexa smirked knowing that meant that she was nervous. “Let me think on it a bit and I will let you know.”

Clarke nodded, slowing down her bouncing. It was still driving Lexa crazy so she moved forward to stop, then realized she didn’t think Clarke liked being touched, so she moved back watching Clarke exhale loudly noticing that Lexa almost grabbed her. Lexa sat back, “Can you stop shaking now, nothing to be nervous about.”

Clarke nodded placing her hand on her own leg to make it stop. Lexa started tracing the design on the table looking around for Raven, when she felt warmth on her hand, she looked down seeing Clarke was touching her. She looked up questioningly, “You can touch me Lexa.”

Lexas eyes bulged making Clarke blush. Lexa let out a laugh, quickly covering her mouth, surprised by herself. “I mean umm, like, you know what I mean!” Lexa kept her mouth covered hiding her smile while Clarke tried to explain herself.

Clarke started bouncing her leg again, Lexa took her hand placing it on the girls knee to get her to stop. She looked up at Clarkes reddening face again, “Don’t worry I know what you mean.” Clarke just nodded in response.

“What did I miss here?” Lexa looked up seeing Raven raising her eyebrow at her, Lexa quickly moved her hand from Clarkes leg, shaking her head at Raven, who just smiled in response.

Clarkes phone began to ring, she quickly picked it up eyeing Lexa and Raven.

“Whats up? No, I’m eating brunch with,” She looked up watching Lexa,”with some friends. No don’t come here! I’m done now anyway.” Clarke picked up Lexas hand and was running her finger along Lexas palm lines, it gave Lexa goosebumps. Raven was watching them intently so Lexa pulled her hand away from Clarke whose eyes widened like she didn’t realize what she was doing. She mouthed the word sorry to her. Lexa just shook her head turning to Raven who had that face again. “I’m heading to my room now.”

Lexa looked up at Clarke who was watching her. “I think we need to talk anyway. We will talk in a little. Yeah bye.”

Clarke hung up the phone. She stood up, making sure she had everything. “So I have to go, thanks for inviting me to eat with you guys, it was nice meeting you Raven.” She turned to Lexa who just waited to see what else the blonde needed to say. “Umm our papers are due Friday, we should probably meet up and go over our final drafts before then.”

Lexa just nodded in response, “I will text you and we can make plans then.” Clarke smiled at her and began to walk away.

She turned to Raven who was grinning. “You like her.” Lexa rolled her eyes not this again. She wasn’t even doing anything to make it seem like she liked Clarke, so why was Raven the second person to make that assumption.

“She likes you too.”

“Raven, I have a girlfriend, and I think Clarke has someone too. So she doesn’t like me and no I don’t like her. We are friends if that, we fight too much to really be friends anyway. She’s irritating.”

“So what was that hand thing? It was cute, but well I don’t go around holding and playing with your hand. I think you’d slap me if I tried.”

“Shut up Reyes, I have to work with her for the rest of this semester, so I will play friendly if I have to. End of story.”

With that Lexa stood up grabbing her things to head out to her next class. Raven rushing to keep up, Lexa slowed a bit knowing it was mean to make Raven rush with her brace, but not enough so Raven would yell at her for it.

**Clarkes POV**

She felt like a winner, she got Lexa probably the most stubborn and probably grumpiest person she ever met to forgive her. She blushed thinking back to the whole “You can touch me comment.” She liked when Lexa touched her though, something that made her rethink herself. She just knew she liked being close to her and when she was playing with her hand it just felt natural, she shouldn’t of done it though she was pushing Lexas limit.

Things were going well, but then Finn called, Finn who seemed to have broken Ravens heart. Raven was awesome, she deserved better and Clarke hoped she would find it. It also made her realize that she deserved better too. She was done with him, and it was time to let him know.

Finn was an ass, even if he did his best to treat her well, she knew more than he let on, and to be honest the sex just wasn’t cutting it anymore. She wanted and needed something more and it wasn’t him. Plus if she really wanted to be a part of Lexas life and even Ravens she knew letting him go would make it so much easier instead of trying to hide him from them and making Octavia hide it too.

She was so deep in her thoughts that she didn’t realize she reached her room and Finn was standing outside of it.

“Hey princess.” He went to pull her in and she stepped away from him.

“Hi Finn. Lets talk inside” She opened the door and motioned for him to go in the room.

He went and sat on her bed motioning for her to sit with him, she took a seat at her desk instead trying to make this as easy as possible. He frowned at her seating arrangement.

“So who were you eating with?”

“Why do….” She thought about it a second, might as well see if she could get him to admit anything to her now. “I was with Lexa.” He rolled his eyes at that. “And her friend Raven.” He definitely looked scared.

“I don’t understand why you spend more time with her than you have to, she’s a bitch and her friend probably is too….”

“You don’t know her Finn, stop talking about her like that, and do you know Raven to say what she is like!?”

“Why do you defend her? Is there something going on here? I mean I know she is gay, what you like her or something? Do I have something to worry about?”

“I defend her because shes my friend and you are ready to put her down every five seconds. And you know what, what I feel for Lexa is none of your business anymore. We are done Finn. You can leave now.”

He stood up from her bed and went to stand in front of her, she was sitting still and had to look up to see his face.

“What do you mean we are done Clarke? You can’t just leave me like this. Do you know what I have given up to be with you? You don’t understand. We aren’t done. I love you.” He placed his hands on her shoulders and squeezed. She tried to make him let go but he wouldn’t. She stood up and pushed him away from her.

“Don’t touch me Finn, I don’t feel the way you do. You have to let go, I won’t do this anymore. I don’t want you. Please just leave.” She started walking to her door to let him out and he grabbed her wrist and squeezed tightly. She tried to pull away but his grip was too strong.

“Finn you are hurting me let go, don’t make this worse.” She kept trying to pull herself away but he wouldn’t release his hold, it felt like he was gripping harder.

“No, I won’t let you do this, I can’t I need you, you're my princess.” He pulled her closer grabbing her chin in his other hand, she tried to twist away, she was scared now, she couldn’t get away from him.

“If you don’t let go of me I swear to God I will scream.” He moved in closer to her face to kiss her when she opened her mouth ready to yell but heard voices coming from the other side of the door and then a key being put in the lock. He let go all of a sudden making Clarke stumble landing on her bed.

“I won’t give up on us Clarke, we are meant to be, I just have to prove it to you.” And with that Octavia opened the door and Finn pushed pass her without another word.

“What the fuck asshole!? Seriously Clarke dump him or I’m gonna kill him.” Octavia turned and saw Clarke sitting on the bed rubbing her wrist which was seriously red and hurt. Her heart was beating so fast, she was trying not to let her tears fall. She had never been so scared in her entire life. Who was that guy? Finn had never treated her that way, he had always been so sweet. She didn’t understand.

“Clarke?” Octavia kneeled down in front of her and lifted Clarkes chin, Clarke quickly rubbed her eyes, wincing at the pain in her wrist. Octavia grabbed her arm studying her wrist. She popped up so fast Clarke almost missed her.

“That son of a Bitch! I’m going to kill him,” Clarke grabbed her with her good arm stopping her from running after Finn.

“No O, he isn’t worth it, its over I broke up with him, please he is gone, we won’t see him again.”

Octavia just looked at her and began wiping the tears off of her face. Clarke was starting to calm down, breathing more regularly. Who was the guy that just did this to her?

**Lexas POV**

“Raven the show is starting come on!!” She was on her bed waiting impatiently.

Raven walked to the room and threw herself down when her phone began to ring. “Shit hold on….. It’s Finn.” Raven was looking at her phone very confused.

Lexas eyes widened, “Hell no Raven you are not talking to him, he’s an ass hole.”

Lexa took Ravens phone and clicked for it to ignore the call while she pulled her in close to her and tried to focus on the tv. That is until Ravens phone started ringing again. Raven was staring at it, Lexa knew if she didn’t do something Raven was going to break. She took the phone and started walking out of the room.

“What are you doing? Where are you going?” She looked up and saw Raven ready to cry, she was done with Finns bullshit in hurting her best friend.

She stepped closer to Raven, cupping her cheek, “Do you trust me?” Raven looked her in the eyes and nodded. Lexa nodded in return and walked out of the room closing the door behind her.

The phone had begun rininging for the third time. She picked it up without hesitating.

“What the fuck do you want Collins?” There was a gasp on the other end.

“You, I don’t know what you did but it is your fault! She loved me until you came along. What did you do!? I swear to God I will get her back and you won’t stand in my way!” He sounded like a crazy man.

“How the fuck was you cheating on Raven my fault! You lost her, you fucked up, don’t blame me! And don’t call her anymore she doesn’t need or want you! Do you fucking understand me?” She heard a click and the line went dead.

That boy had lost his mind. She walked back into the room tossing Raven her phone back who had brought her knees up to her chest and had her arms wrapped around her legs.

“What did he want?” Lexa sat down making Raven relax the way she was sitting. Raven was one of the strongest people she knew but Finn broke her and she was finally putting herself back together, she deserved so much better and Lexa would not let her go down that deep dark hole again, her best friend her responsibility.

“He is delusional, he blamed you guys breaking up on me somehow.” She shrugged, it just didn’t make sense.

“How the fuck?! He’s a cheating bastard who left me for another girl! Is he crazy?” Lexa chuckled.

“He is certifiable, I am sure of it.” Raven laughed at that response. Lexa put a pillow down on her lap and gestured for Raven to put her head down. Raven did and Lexa started running her hands through her hair unpausing the television.

“Now shut up this is supposed to be a good episode.”

“Lexa, thank you.”

Lexa smiled but swatted Raven in the head.  “I said shut up Reyes, one more word and you are out of here.”

Raven just laughed in response her focus going back to show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now was Finn talking about Raven??? I dont think so.... Plus yeah he did that to Clarke because he is CRAZY!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alot of Lexa and Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like this chapter... I seriously love Lexa guys its a problem.

**Clarkes POV**

She woke up the next day with bruising in the shape of a hand on her wrist, she was still in shock and kind of scared of ever seeing Finn again. She had turned her phone off right after he left in case he tried to contact her.

Clarke rolled over to see Octavia watching her from her bed.

“How you feeling princess?”

“Don’t ever call me that O, please.”

Octavias eyes widened, “Crap, sorry didn’t think before I spoke. You missed your classes.”  Clarke just nodded in response.

“I’m fine just want to be alone for a while.” With that Clarke got up and began looking for clothes. Then she felt a hand on her shoulder, she turned to see Octavia looking at her with a sad smile.

“You stay here, I’m going over to Lincolns, might just spend the night there so you can have your time. Okay?” Clarke sighed in relief. She stood up and hugged her roommate.

“Thanks O.”

Octavia pressed a kiss to the top of Clarkes head, and then moved to grab the stuff she would need.

“Text me if you need anything at all.” Clarke nodded in response getting comfortable back in bed turning her computer on so she could get lost in the world of Netflix.

Octavia left soon after leaving Clarke alone. She couldn’t concentrate on anything.

She spent the rest of the day in bed like that. She looked up at the window feeling surprised that the sun had gone down. She got up to make herself a snack when there was a banging on the door that made her jump out of her skin.

**Lexas POV**

She was done with practice early, and already tired but she still had to meet with Clarke for their paper. She had texted her last night but didn’t receive a response. She looked at her watch seeing it was three. She took her phone out to text the blonde again.

Lexa: Hey, what time you free today?

Lexa went to go take a shower, waiting on Clarke to respond, wondering what was taking so long, Clarke was usually a really fast texter. She took her time, she loved showers, they were her time of day to not think and just relax. She got out and went straight to her phone.

She frowned it was four now and still no text.

Lexa: Clarke?

 She began getting dressed and then sat back on her bed turning on her television to waste some time, still waiting for a response.

She must have drifted off for a bit because next thing she knew is it was six and the sun was going down. She looked at her phone and still nothing. She was getting pissed. They needed to go over each other’s papers before the morning.

Lexa: What the fuck Griffin!?

Lexa was done waiting it was seven thirty! She picked up her phone and called Lincoln. It rang twice before he picked up.

“Hey Lex, what’s up?”

“Are you with Octavia and Clarke?” She tried to keep her anger in check.

She heard some shuffling, “I’m with Octavia, why what’s going on?”

“Where is Clarke?”

“I think back in her room, O said she needed some alone time. What’s going on?”

“What’s her room? Ark tower right?” Lexa grabbed a pen ready to write down whatever Lincoln told her.

“Yeah, why do you need her room number?” Lexa was getting seriously frustrated but she knew Lincoln wouldn’t tell her if she showed how upset she was.

“I need to drop off her edited paper for class tomorrow but she’s taking long to respond to my texts.” At least she told part of the truth she thought, she just left out the part where she was going to kill her too.

“Oh, um 319.”

“Thanks talk to you later.” She hung up before Lincoln could ask any other question. Lexa grabbed her bag making sure she had her paper. She slammed her room door closed making Anya jump in the kitchen.

“Wheres the fire Lexa?” Lexa just glared at her and walked towards the door slamming that one on her way out too. She heard Anya yelling at her from the hallway.

“Nice talking to you too, Jerk!” She rolled her eyes and kept walking. She took out her phone and called Clarkes phone, if she picked up she would warn her of her imminent death, but it went straight to voice mail.

Lexa made the fifteen minute walk in ten. She didn’t even wait for the elevator and just walked to the third floor straight to room 319 where she banged the door hard enough she thought it was going to crack.

She heard shuffling around in the room before she knocked again this time a little softer. She heard a quiet voice, sounding kind of scared.

“Who is it?”

“Fricking Santa Clause, sorry I’m three months late. Open the damn door Griffin.”

The door opened slowly, Lexa pushed pass Clarke and turned to face her, “Give me a reason I shouldn’t kill you right…” Lexa froze, Clarke looked like shit. Her eyes were red and swollen. She didn’t look like she had left her room all day. Lexa looked around the room realizing the only light was coming from the hallway. Clarke was still in pajamas and she was visibly shaking. Lexa took a step closer “Clarke what’s wrong?” She took Clarkes hand but let go as soon as she saw Clarke wince in pain, she looked and saw a bruise on the other girl’s wrist. She felt the fire return to her stomach immediately.

** Clarkes POV**

Clarkes heart was beating so fast, what if it was Finn again? How could she get him to go away? She was shaking.

Then came another knock this one a little softer. Clarke walked closer to the door. “Who is it?” She didn’t mean to whisper but it came out that way.

“Fricking Santa Clause, sorry I’m three months late. Open the damn door Griffin.”

Clarkes eyes widened. Lexa? Why would Lexa be at her room? She opens the door, and then gets pushed to the side while Lexa just invites heself in. So damn rude.

“Give me a reason I shouldn’t kill you right…” Clarke watches as Lexa takes in her appearance making her feel very self-conscious. Clarke takes her good hand and trys to pat her hair down, knowing she probably looks like a lion. She freezes when Lexa takes a step closer to her.

“Clarke what’s wrong?” Lexa grabs her bad hand making Clarke wince in pain, Lexa must notice because she immediately lets go and is looking at her wrist. Clarke moves her arm behind her back, trying to make Lexa stop looking.

Clarke looks up into Lexas face and takes a step back seeing all the anger in the other girls face. Clarke thought she saw Lexa look mad before but that is nothing compared to what she sees in front of her. She sees Lexa close her eyes for a couple of seconds and notes that Lexa is mouthing numbers.

“Lexa?” Clarke puts a hand on Lexas shoulder feeling the tension. But Lexa just puts her finger up signaling that she needs a moment. Clarke nods even though Lexas eyes are still closed and walks back to sit on her bed, stopping to close the door and turning on a light.

Clarke is waiting for Lexa who has finally opened her eyes and seems calmer. She walks over to Clarke and takes Clarkes wrist in her hand gently running her fingers along the bruise, it tingles where she touches and Clarke feels goosebumps forming. Lexa looks at her face, Clarke blinks a couple of times trying to push away the feeling of Lexa touching her had on her head.

“Who did this to you?” Clarke looks down then and then quickly back to Lexa and then back to the ground. She pulls her legs onto her bed and sits indian style, motioning for Lexa to sit next to her.

She can’t look at her and talk, she doesn’t know why, so she keeps her eyes on the floor, she begins talking before she decides what to say.

“The phone call I got when we were together yesterday was from my boyfriend. I had decided to break up with him, so I left to go meet up with him and end things. He met me here when I started talking to him trying to end things….” She shrugged. “He didn’t take it very well, he said he loved me, but I don’t love him, He said he wouldn’t let me go. I asked him to leave, he grabbed me and wouldn’t let go even when I said he was hurting me. He grabbed by face with his other hand, and went to force me into a kiss. But then Octavia was here and he rushed out saying he wouldn’t give up on me.”

Clarke looked to see Lexa nodding. “Where is he now? Has he tried talking to you again?”

Clarke shrugged in response, I turned my phone off as soon as he left and haven’t turned it back on since in case he was going try and contact me.” Lexa nodded again.

“That explains me not hearing back from you.”

Clarke was confused, “why were you trying to get in touch with me so bad that you showed up here? Apparently ready to kill me?” She smiled at Lexa who looked down in embarrassment.

“I thought you were ignoring me, and we said we would meet up to go over our papers before they were due tomorrow. Now that I think about it…. I may have overreacted.”

Clarke slapped her own head, crap she was an idiot. “I’m so sorry! I totally forgot, that was so selfish of me.” She jumped up looking around for her book bag, when she felt Lexa pull her to turn around and then all of a sudden Lexas arms were around her. Clarke froze for a second, Lexa was hugging her! Clarke quickly placed her arms around the other girl. She placed her head on Lexas shoulder and breathed in, she smelled amazing. Clarke felt safe, but all too soon Lexa was pulling away.

“I’m glad you are okay, if I ever see this guy I will kick his ass for you, a man should never put his hands on a woman.” Clarke tried to respond but she couldn’t she just wanted to pull Lexa back into her. She nodded at what Lexa said and turned back around to grab her bag when her stomach grumbled. Lexa gave a light laugh at the noise.

“Have you eaten today Clarke?” Clarke looked down blushing, and just shrugged her shoulders.

“I snacked here and there but not an actual meal.” Lexa nodded and looked around the room.

“Well the dining halls are probably closing and you don’t have kitchen to cook anything, plus I’m hungry too. Come back to my place and I will cook us something, and we can go over our papers.”

“You don’t have to that Lexa! Seriously, we can just go over the papers now and you can be done with me until tomorrow.”

Lexas phone decided to start ringing at that moment, Lexa looked at the screen eyes widening in surprise, she gave Clarke a finger again, making Clarke roll her eyes in response, but kept watching Lexa talk.

“Cos, is everything okay? Oh I’m with my friend right now, so I can’t talk. Yeah well, now you know how it feels. Yes, I see you are trying but I still have to go. Mhm me too, call you later. Bye.”

Clarke looked away as soon as Lexa finished talking.

Lexa picked up her bag, and turned to Clarke, putting it back down, “you might want to put clothing on, its still pretty cold outside.”

Clarke looked at Lexa confused until she remembered she was only wearing short shorts and a tank top. Her eyes widened and her face reddened in embarrassment. How could she not notice earlier that she was half naked? She ran to her closet and grabbed some clothes and then to the bathroom where she could hear Lexa chuckling. Clarke quickly changed, and then looked at her face in the mirror, she looked like crap! She quickly washed her face and put her hair up into a messy bun. Ok just a little less crappy now.

She walked out of the bathroom and did a little twirl for Lexa, and laughed at herself.

Lexas eyes widened, “Clarke you’re…… Human! I swore you were part lion when I first got here!” Clarke full out laughed grabbing the closest thing to her and threw it at Lexa which happened to be the teddy bear she stole from her. Lexa apparently had amazing reflexes and caught it.

“Hey don’t throw my bear.” Lexa got up and placed it back on the bed and patted its head, she turned towards the door and motioned for Clarke to follow.

 Clarke followed her and looked back at her room thinking about how down she had been all day and how Lexa was able to make her feel better almost instantly. She had only seen this side of her with Raven before. Lexa was letting her in and Clarke didn’t want anything else.

**Lexas POV**

Clarke walked slow, annoyingly slow, it took them twenty minutes to get back to her room, she didn’t yell at her though so in her mind she deserved a pat on the back.

Lexa unlocked the door motioning for Clarke to walk in. The place was quiet, Lexa wondered where Anya had made off to. Lexa went to her room and unlocked that door too. Clarke was following quietly behind her.

“Last time I was here you were yelling at me to get out.” Clarke stepped into the room putting her bag on the floor.

“Well your drunk ass fell on me, what did you expect?”

“Lexa I told you I didn’t drink anything that night.” Lexa looked over to see the blonde pouting, she was adorable. Lexa eyes furrowed in confusion what the hell was that thought?

“Come on Clarke you can go over my notes while I cook and ask questions if you have any, and retype your paper.” Clarke nodded heading out to the kitchen.

Lexa had been cooking for about twenty minutes and Clarke working on her paper when there was a giant sigh. Lexa turned to Clarke who began banging her head on the table. Lexa walked over and placed her hand between the table and Clarkes head but the Blonde kept on banging.

“Clarke. Stop it. Clarke! The food is going to burn and then I’m going to kill you and cook you.” Clarke stopped and looked up with fear in her eyes, Lexa kept her face very serious making Clarke straighten up right away.

She turned away from the blonde returning to the food. Another twenty minutes later and the food was done, Lexa served both of them and sat down across from Clarke who was typing away furiously.

“Your food is going to get cold.”

“Almost done, I wanna finish first.” Lexa nodded understanding because she wanted to finish her paper as soon as possible too.

By the time Clarke finished Lexa was done eating, so Clarke passed the computer to her so Lexa could her started on her paper now. Lexa focused in completely trying to get this done as soon as possible. Once completed she read over her own and Clarkes essay surprised at how well their essays complimented each other’s. They would definitely get A’s.

Lexa looked up realizing Clarke hadn’t said anything in a long time. She was sleeping on the kitchen table. Lexa Sighed and rubbed her head, what was she supposed to do with her? She looked at the time seeing that it was eleven already. Lexa stood up to clean the kitchen when she realized it was already spotless, Clarke must have cleaned it while she worked.

Lexa just stood there looking down at Clarke trying to figure out what to do. She looked at Clarkes wrist, she could see where he ex boyfriends fingers had squeezed. She hated that someone had her that way. Lexa didn’t realize until she saw that Clarke was hurt that she cared about her at all. But she did, Clarke was now her friend, her annoying friend true but still her friend.

She sighed and poked Clarkes arm, the girl didn’t stir so she poked her again. There was a little mumble but not enough. Lexa shook Clarkes shoulder, “Clarke.”

“Five minutes mom.” Lexa smiled, this girl was so annoying.

“Clarke Griffin get up or I swear I will leave you at this table all night.”

Clarke looked up, rubbing her eyes “Lexa?” She looked around realizing where she was. “Crap its late I better get going.”

Clarke started putting her stuff away and headed to Lexas room to get the rest of her stuff. Lexa followed and sat on her bed.

“Clarke its late we have class early and its too long of a walk to do alone. Do you drool?”

Clarke paused at the question. “What?”

“Do you drool?”

“Um, not that I know of why?”

Lexa got up and started going through her drawers looking for extra pajamas. She found some and went to offer them to Clarke.

“Trying to decide if I can trust you on my pillows or not.”

Clarke looked at what Lexa was holding in her arms.

“Wait what?”

“You are staying over you idiot, we have the same class anyway.” Lexa shrugged it just made sense.

“Are you sure? We haven’t known each other that long. Could be weird.”

Lexa just studied Clarke, she was right they hadn’t even known each other a full two weeks, she would never let anyone besides Raven sleep over.

“Are you going to try and sexually harass or murder me in my sleep?” She raised an eyebrow at the blonde who turned very red and began shaking her head. “Then you can stay, I trust you. But if you drool I may murder you just so you know.”

Clarke took the clothes Lexa had and went to change in the bathroom.

Lexa changed in her room, She got under the covers and turned the tv on very low, she scooted to the edge of the bed making sure there would be enough room for Clarke. She took out her phone to text Costia.

Lexa: Didn’t have time to call you back tonight. Call you 2mm. Sorry.

Lexa plugged her phone in to charge making sure her alarm was on when Clarke walked back into the room and stood awkwardly at the end of the bed.

“The bed wont bite Clarke just get in and go to sleep, you better not give me any trouble waking up for class in the morning.”

Clarke nodded and climbed onto the bed, Lexa lifted the covers so Clarke could get under too. The bed was big enough that they had space between them but small enough that they could feel each other’s body heat.

Lexa turned away from the Blonde watching the tv, “Thank you Lexa for all of this.” Lexa didn’t say anything, acting as if she didn’t hear her at all.

Lexa began falling asleep shortly after but every time she was almost completely sleeping Clarke would move around. She turned around making Clarke freeze mid movement.

“What’s wrong Clarke?!” Clarke closed her eyes and covered her face with the blanket feigning sleep. Lexa rolled her eyes and pulled the blanket away from her face, Clarke still pretended to sleep so Lexa stood waiting until she messed up. It took all of ten seconds for Clarke to peek one of her eyes open.

“Talk.” Clarke sighed and rolled onto her side to face Lexa.

“I can’t sleep.”

Lexa rolled her eyes, she was going to smother the girl to sleep in two minutes. “Why?”

“I don’t know. Wanna talk a little?”

“Clarke!” Lexa rolled onto her back, she was going to kill her.

“Please Lex! It will help me sleep.”

“What do you want to talk about.” Lexa felt Clarke shrug.

“I don’t know just keep talking until I fall asleep, your voice is soothing.” Lexas eyes widened at that, no one had ever told that before.

“Fine. Get comfortable first though.” Clarke began shifting around until her forehead was leaning on Lexas shoulder, causing her to tense up.

“Do you want me to move?”

“Will you shut up and fall asleep faster this way?” She felt Clarke move her head up and down. “Then fine stay this way.” Lexa made herself relax.

Lexa was trying to think of something to say  when she found herself already talking.

“ I was adopted by Lincolns parents when I was eight years old. But I knew them almost my entire life, they lived next door to me. Our mother used to watch me at night because my own mother worked night shifts at the hospital. She had separated from my father right after I was born so it was just us. It never bothered me because I had Lincoln and his parents, they were my second home. We used to spend ours just playing, mostly play fighting, that was back when Lincoln could actually beat me” Lexa felt Clarke burrow herself in more.

“My mom dropped me off earlier than usual one night at Lincolns house because she said she had to meet a friends before work. She worked so hard all the time just for me.” Lexa could feel that Clarkes breathing had evened out so she assumed that the girl had already fallen asleep but she felt the need to keep talking.

“Turns out she had gone to meet my father to ask for child support because she was struggling financially. Barely being able to keep our house. He didn’t like it apparently. I didn’t know until later that she left my father because he was physically abusive. He beat her that night, until she died. I don’t remember what the last thing I said to her was. I like to think that it was that I loved her but I was eight so it was probably something stupid. That’s why I got so mad when I saw your wrist, I can’t see anyone be hurt that way especially my friends. I will make sure that guy never hurts you again Clarke. With that she kissed the top of Clarkes head and tried to drift off to sleep.

Right on the edge of a deep sleep she was sure she felt a kiss being pressed into her shoulder but she was too far gone to check if it was real or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think? Does her reaction make sense given her past? Do you like how they are progressing?


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guys... Progress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are moving along!

**Lexas POV**

Lexa was hot, why was it so damn hot? She threw the blanket off of herself and turned to face the wall, but there was something in her way. She groaned and pushed at it.

“Stop pushing!”

Lexas eyes opened in surprise, and she saw Clarkes head pop up from a pillow. Lexa started rubbing her eyes because she must be seeing things. Clarke pulled her hands down, “Stop messing with your eyes.” Clarke rolled over putting her back to face Lexa. “Go back to sleep.”

Lexa laid on her back and stared at the ceiling, remembering everything that had happened the night before. She told Clarke things about herself barely anyone knew. She just hoped she had been right and Clarke had slept through the end of her talking.

Lexa closed her eyes, she felt Clarke moving around again, but tried to ignore it, but then she felt an arm go around her waist. Lexa tensed up, how could she get her off of her without waking her up? Lexa was frozen she shouldn’t let Clarke hold her like this, if Lincoln saw this he would freak out on her. Shit.

Like a saving grace Lexas alarm started going off. She went to sit up and turn it off when Clarke pulled her in closer and began mumbling in her ear, something about eight am classes being hell.

“Clarke.” Clarke burrowed in closer to her, She couldn’t do this, Lexa went to get up again, but once again Clarke pulled her in closer, nestling her head into Lexas neck. Goosebumps rose on Lexas neck where she could feel the blondes breath and she felt herself shiver.

Lexa inhaled deeply, she shouldn’t be effected this was way, it was wrong because.. wait why was it wrong?  Costia! Lexa shook her head trying to clear it. “Clarke get off!” The blonde jumped and pulled herself away.

“Lexa? What’s wrong?”

Lexa got up quickly and went to the bathroom closing the door behind her. She turned the water on and began splashing her face, she looked into the mirror noting the red on her cheeks. She had to go see Costia she didn’t have a choice, she needed to be reminded that she was in love, she couldn’t be weak, she didn’t feel anything for Clarke, not like that, she had just been alone for so long. Lexa nodded at herself in the mirror.

It wasn’t Clarkes fault, she knew that. Clarke was her friend, just her friend who needed her right now, she had been through enough. Lexa would help her any way she could, but first she needed to work things out with Costia. Maybe Clarke was just always close with her friends that way. Lexa shouldn’t let it affect her, and just give the blonde what she needed.

Lexa nodded she needed to use her head.

**Clarkes POV**

She jumped when Lexa yelled at her to get off, and then Lexa ran to the bathroom, she had been in there a little longer than she actually needed to be Clarke thought.

Clarke sat up on the bed, rubbing her face in order to wake herself up. She remembered everything Lexa told her last night. All of it, she hadn’t fallen asleep but pretended to be because she wanted Lexa to continue talking. Lexa had actually fallen asleep first but not before placing a kiss on Clarkes head.

Once she was sure Lexa was asleep Clarke just watched her, she was beautiful, and so relaxed when sleeping. She couldn’t help but press a kiss to her shoulder. Now that she was wide awake and thought about she was definitely a creep. Her new friend had taken care of her and Clarke was taking it to another level.

Octavia was right… She liked Lexa. If she wasn’t sure about it last night she was definitely sure about it this morning. She was half asleep when she tried cuddling Lexa it wasn’t fair. She didn’t really do it on purpose. Lexa smell was intoxicating though. Clarke laid back and pulled the blanket up to her face, it smelled like Lexa, it all did. Clarke shook her, she needed to stop.

She had never liked a girl before let alone been physically attracted to one, it is not that she was against it but it was new and different. She thought back to the last time she had touched herself, if she was being honest, she was thinking about Lexa when she had done it.

Clarke heard the bathroom door open, but she couldn’t look at Lexa, she just couldn’t now that she was figuring everything out. She kept her head under the covers trying to calm herself down

“Clarke, we have to go.” She felt Lexa shaking her arm. “Clarke can you just get up so we don’t have to fight about something again!?”

She brought her head out from under the sheet to see a frustrated Lexa looking back at her. She looked cute when she was frustrated. Clarkes cheek flushed at that thought and she ducked her head back down under the covers.

That didn’t last long though because the sheets were dragged away from her a moment later, she tried pulling them back but this was Lexa she was playing tug of war with, she lost instantly.

“Clarke Griffin you will never spend another night here if this is how you act in the morning.” Clarke sat up at the threat and scrambled to stand up at the end of the bed. Lexa was glaring at her, she walked around her with her arms up in surrender as she made her way to the bathroom.

She could hear Lexa mumbling. She heard something about an annoying blonde which made her giggle. Lexa must of heard because she was then being yelled at to hurry the hell up. Clarke sighed and finished up in the bathroom, making her way to Lexa who was getting everything together.

Clarke sat next to her and began putting her shoes on, she bumped shoulders into Lexa who just glared at her again. Clarke rolled her eyes at that. “So you’re not a morning person.”

Lexa just got up and went to get her jacket to go, leaving Clarke scrambling to make sure she got all of her stuff too. They began walking to class, silently Lexa still being grumpy but at least walking slow enough for her to keep up.

“Lexa, I’m hungry.” Lexa just glanced at her from the side.

 “We don’t have time to stop for something, thanks to your shenanigans this morning.”  Clarke rolled her eyes at that, she only stood in bed like ten minutes longer than Lexa did.

“Want to grab something after class with me?” Clarke got nervous for a second, she doesn’t think she ever initiated seeing Lexa outside of class unless it was class related. She shrugged it off, they were friends now, hell she slept in the other girls bed last night.

“I can’t. I am going to visit my girlfriend this weekend, so I have to go back to my room and get my stuff together so I can leave as soon as possible and surprise her.”

Clarke froze for a second, missing a step and then just stopped walking. How could she have forgotten Lexa had a girlfriend. She was an idiot. She barely knew the girl and she had a crush on her. Was she sixteen again or something?

“Lexa I don’t know you!? Lexa stopped walking turning and looking at Clarke with a confused face.

“What? Keep walking Griffin.” Clarke jogged to catch up. Thinking of how little she knew about the girl she was walking with.

“I don’t know you, you don’t know me. But you let me stay over your house last night. Why?

Lexa shrugged in response,” I don’t know, you needed it and you needed someone, I was there. Was I supposed to just leave you in your room yesterday? Should I have?”

Clarke shook her head quickly. “No you... you were amazing yesterday,” She ducked her head down trying to make sure Lexa didn’t see her blush. “Thank you for that, you didn’t have to.”

Lexa nodded and seemed to think before responding, “You’re my friend now… maybe.”

Clarke laughed at that, “I’m your friend maybe?  I feel so flattered to even be a maybe friend to the great Alexandria Woods.”

“Don’t call me that or we will officially not be friends.” That made Clarke laugh more. They walked in silence for a bit more. They were almost to the class when Clarke got the courage to ask the question on her mind.

“So going to see your girlfriend?”

She looked to Lexa who just nodded in response. Clarke waited for more but Lexa wasn’t sharing.

“So how long have you guys been together?” She was expecting for Lexa to say a couple a months or maybe a year.

“A little over three years now.” Clarkes eyes widened. Three years?!

“Wait what year are you in?! How did you guys meet? How old are you?!”

“That’s a lot of questions Clarke.” Clarke was stubborn though so she kept her eyes on Lexa while they walked until Lexa would relent and answer. She got her way.

“I am a junior credit wise, I took a lot of AP classes in high school. I met Costia in high school, she was my best friend before we started dating. I am 21 years old though because I kind of got left back in third grade.”

“So you basically caught back up to the right grade again because of all your AP classes.” Lexa just nodded. “I can’t believe you got left back, you’re so smart.”

Lexa just shrugged,” It was a tough year for me.”

Next thing Clarke knew they were entering the classroom together. Professor Kane looked up and saw they had come in together and were talking, she noticed his smile as he turned to prepare the board.

They chose their seats and Clarke was doing good, she was completely focused on what Mr.Kane was saying when Lexa put a note on her desk. Clarke looked up questioningly but Lexa was looking straight ahead as if she didn’t do anything.

“I know what I want.” What was she talking about?

“What you want for what?”

“You still owe me from our deal.” Clarke smiled looking at Lexa who was pretending to be paying attention to Mr.Kane.

“Okay, what is it?”

“Draw for me.”  Clarke just stared at that last note confused. Draw for her? What did she mean? Before she could write back class was over, she shoved the note into her bag trying to move fast enough so she could ask Lexa what she meant. Lexa was getting up when Clarke grabbed her arm.

“What do you mean draw for you? Like draw you?”

Lexa shook her head smirking, “No don’t draw me but..” She shrugged. “I like your drawings so I don’t know when you draw something I want you to show me and give me the ones you don’t want.”

Clarke just stared at her confused still, why would she want her stuff. “Lexa what would you even do with them? They really aren’t that good anyway.”

Lexa glared at her, “They are good, you’re talented just accept it, I don’t know what I will do with them, I just know I want them. These are the terms of the deal, accept or we go back to fighting.”

Clarkes eyes widened, “You’re threatening me!”

Lexa rolled her eyes, “You’re exaggerating. I have to go soon, so whats it going to be?”

Clarke watched Lexa who was waiting for an answer, she felt like they were having a staring contest. Lexas eyes were so green and intense, there was no way she would win. “Fine, I will give you some of my sketches I guess.” She looked up to see a triumphant Lexa, she rolled her eyes in response. They began walking out of the room.

Clarke went to say goodbye to Lexa when she spotted Finn in the corner of her eye. She automatically grabbed Lexas arm, and pulled her along faster.

“Clarke what are you doing!? Where are you going?! Stop.”

Clarke kept pulling trying to get away. She saw Finn glare and stomp in the opposite direction, just as Lexa tugged her arm away from her and began glaring at her.

“Sorry I um….” Lexa must have seen the change in her face because she started looking around.

“I saw my ex, I just wanted to get away, and I don’t know my instinct told me to grab you too.”

“Where is he? What does he look like?” Lexa was searching the crowd like a hawk trying to spot her prey.

“He walked away already, sorry about that.” Lexa glared at her again.

“You should have told me earlier, I want know who this guy is and have a talk with him about how to treat women.” Clarke rolled her eyes at that.

“Sure Lexa you want to talk.” Lexa shrugged in response.

“Are you going to be okay?” Clarke felt her stomach flip thinking that Lexa worried for her. Clarke nodded.

“Okay, I really do have to go, but you should turn your phone on.”

Clarke nodded in response, “It should be back in my room, I will turn it on when I get home.”

Lexa nodded, “Alright, well have a nice weekend.”

Lexa turned to walk away but Clarke grabbed her and pulled her in for a hug, Lexa stiffened but relaxed after a second, hugging Clarke back quickly.

“Thank you Lexa.” Lexa pulled away.

“Stop thanking me. Goodbye ClarKe.”

Wow Clarke loved the way Lexa said her name, she made it sound….. sexy. Clarkes cheeks flushed at the thought and she turned to walk away before Lexa could notice.

**Lexas POV**

She went to her room to pack everything she would need. She picked up her phone to tell Costia she was coming. By some miracle she picked up.

“Lexa! Hey!”

“Hey Cos, where are you going to be in four hours?”

“Um here.”

She heard Costia laugh like what she asked was funny.

“Pick me up from your main campus?”

She heard an intake of breath.

“Wait what? You’re coming here Lex?”

“Yeah, my bus leaves in thirty minutes.”

“Babe I have a lot of practice this weekend that’s why I couldn’t go to you.”

Lexa didn’t respond waiting to see what Cos would say next.

“But if you’re okay with that, I will spend every free moment I have with you while you’re here.”

Lexa sighed in relief at that response.

“I’m good with that. See you soon, text you when I get close.”

“See you soon beautiful!”

Lexa hung up the phone and started heading to the main circle to wait for the bus.

**Two hours later**

This was the longest bus ride of her life. She had been listening to music, but she had another two and half hours left. Her phone rang alerting her to a message. It was from Clarke. Why would Clarke be texting her.

Lexa opened the message seeing that it was a picture. A picture of a painting of the stars, but more than that, outer space. There was so much color and beauty, Lexa had never seen anything like it before. Another message came in from Clarke.

Clarke: I did this a while ago but figured if like my stupid doodles, you might like this too.

Lexa just stared at the picture for a full five minutes, trying to take it in. How could someone paint that? It looked impossible.

Lexa: You did that?

 Lexa saved the picture, and decided to just make folder putting in the other picture she had of Clarkes art.

Clarke: Lol yes Lexa.

Lexa: Incredible.

Clarke: Lol thanks. How’s the ride going?

 Lexa looked out the window, she wished they were driving faster.

Lexa: Slow.

Clarke: Poor Lexa :(

 Lexa rolled her eyes. Clarke was such a pain.

Lexa: Shut it Griffin, why are you so annoying?

Clarke: Yet you are still talking to me, you must love me.

Seriously this girl was full of it. Lexa could fix that.She put her phone in her pocket and closed her eyes, maybe she could take a nap.

When Lexa opened her eyes, two hours had passed. She smiled to herself, there was nothing better than sleeping through long rides. She took out her phone to text Costia that she would be there in ten minutes when she saw she had three different texts from Clarke.

Clarke: Lexa?

Clarke: Haha I get it.

Clarke: I can’t stand you

Lexa laughed out loud, covering her mouth trying to cover the sound.

Lexa: ;)

She had to give the girl some kind of response. Lexa opened her messages with Costia.

Lexa: Be there in less than 10.

She had been to Costias school maybe five times since Costia began attending. Costia had probably visited her school about the same amount which meant they had rarely seen each other in the three years they had been apart. Unless their vacations had lined up which wasn’t often not including winter and summer breaks, but Costia spent her winter break with family in Florida so it didn’t count.

Lexas phone vibrated.

Clarke: Nope not talking to you now.

Lexa smiled, Clarke would never out stubborn her, she would have to learn. Lexa was more stubborn and in the end would get her way.

The bus started pulling in to the circle so Lexa put her phone away. She grabbed her stuff when the bus stopped and stepped out. Next thing she knew she was in Costias arms, she hadn’t even seen the girl coming. Lexa dropped her bag and wrapped her arms around the girls waist.

“I didn’t realize how much I missed you until right now Lex.”

Lexa just smiled and buried her face in Costias familiar curls. But then she heard someone clearing their throat so she let go of Costia and looked for the source of the sound. She went to glare at the girl she saw standing oddly close to them, until Costia went to stand next to her. Lexa felt confused. She had never seen this girl before on any of her previous visits.

Costia put her arm around the girls shoulders who snuggled in closer. Lexa raised her eyebrow at the movement. That was interesting. Lexa didn’t like her she didn’t know why but her gut told her not to, and she always trusted her gut.

“Lex this is my friend Nia.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come on I had to include Nia! Clarke is accepting that she likes Lexa! Lexa still in denial ofcourse.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke tries to figure out what she feels, Lexa and costia time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual hope you enjoy, and thank you for all your comments they mean the world to me.

**Clarkes POV**

Clarke: Nope not talking to you now.

Clarke kept looking at her phone, waiting to see if Lexa would text her back. Didn’t seem like it. Clarke sighed, she had a problem.

She doesn’t remember the last time she had a crush on someone, or even liked someone she couldn’t have.

“For fucks sake Griffin she has a girlfriend, she’s probably already with her girlfriend, her very serious more than three year long girlfriend.”

She was driving herself crazy, what did her girlfriend look like? Was she like Lexa or was she more open, did she smile all the time? What was Lexas type? Was she Lexas type?

Clarke threw herself onto her bed she needed a fucking distraction, she was being ridiculous and she knew it. She heard keys being put into the door and jumped up running to open the door. Octavia stood there her keys still in the door.

“Well hello to you to Clarke?”

Clarke grabbed Octavia and pulled her into the room. “Hello O, any plans for tonight I want to do something?”

Octavia just looked at her. “Shouldn’t you be mad.”

Clarke paused, why should she be mad? She thought back and couldn’t think of anything.

“No, why?”

“Lincoln said Lexa was heading over here yesterday for some paper thing which ruined your day alone thing.”

“Oh no it was fine. We really did need to go over our papers, she helped distract me.”

Octavia was making a face. “She distracted you?” What did you guys do?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Seriously O we did our work that’s it, you do realize she has a girlfriend right?”

Octavia nodded. “What exactly do you want to do tonight?”

Clarke shrugged. She just needed a distraction. He phone beeped, Clarke jumped thinking Lexa had finally texted her back, her face fell when she saw the name.

Finn: Can we talk?

Clarke just shook her head and put the phone back down, she couldn’t do this. Pining for Lexa and avoiding Finn.

“Are there any parties? Alcohol would be appreciated.” Octavia jumped up and started cheering making Clarke laugh out loud.

“YES! Single Clarke is back!!!,” Octavia ran to the door and swung it open, “She’s back…. Son of a Bitch!” Octavia slammed the door and locked it as fast as she had opened it.

Clarke stopped laughing she felt her stomach drop, she stood up and walked to the door something was wrong. Octavia grabbed her quickly and pulled her away. “O, whats wrong?”

“Finn.”

Clarkes stomach dropped. No.

“Princess I know you’re in there, please open the door we can talk about this.”

**Lexas POV**

Nia wouldn’t leave and it was driving her crazy. How is it that she felt like a third wheel? They were sitting on Costias bed, Lexa on one side of Costia, Nia on the other. It was bugging her how close they were but she was trying to play nice and avoid a fight.

She needed a distraction though.

Lexa: Done not talking to me Clarke?

The sun had already gone, she couldn’t concentrate on what they were watching, she just kept scrolling through her phone wondering what was taking Clarke so long to respond, that girl was always on her phone.

When Lexa looked up she saw that Nia was watching her, she raised an eyebrow. Nia just smiled in return, but it was off, it didn’t meet her eyes, then she turned her attention back to the television. Lexa kept watching her.

“What time do you have practice in the morning Costia?”

“She has practice at nine.” Lexa just glared at the side of Nias face.

“Shouldn’t we be calling it a night then Cos, I want to spend some alone time with you.”

“We always spend Friday nights together.” Lexa was losing her patience who the hell was this girl? She got up from the bed blocking Costias view.

“What the hell Lex move.”  
“Are you serious right now? I come to see you and this is how it’s going to be? “

Costia just looked at her and then at Nia, who apparently took that as her cue to speak.

“She didn’t ask you to come here.” Lexa saw Costias eyes widen at what Nia had said, she looked back up to Lexa who was ready to pounce. Costia got up and put her arm on Lexa attempting to calm her.

“Nia, I am feeling kind of tired, see you at practice tomorrow?” Nia glared at Lexa for a second and then got up nodding to Costia. She pulled her away from Lexa and kissed her on the forehead while grasping Costias hips. What the fuck was that?

Nia left without looking at Lexa again.

“What the hell Costia!?”

Costia turned to look at Lexa, bringing her hands to Lexas neck and pulled her in close. “Why you so grumpy baby?”

Lexa moved Costias arms from around her. “Stop, we need to talk.”

Costia pouted, moving closer to Lexa again. “We can talk later.” She started kissing Lexas jaw and made her way down to Lexas neck, Lexa lost her train of thought, she closed her eyes and tilted her head to give Costia better access. She felt herself shiver at each one of Costias little nips. Her phone vibrated in her back pocket bringing her out of her cloud.

She put her hands on Costia and pushed her away lightly. “No Cos, we need to talk.” Costia sighed and sat down on the bed.

 “About what Alexandria?”

Lexa raised her eyebrow, so that’s how this was going to go. “Don’t be petty, Cos.” Costia rolled her eyes but nodded.

“What do you think we need to talk about?”

Lexa sat down on the bed, and Costia sat next to her. There was so much she wanted to talk about. She needed to figure out if they both still wanted to be together. What the hell was Nias problem, did Nia like Costia, and did Costia like Nia? Did Costia still love her, and deep down if she still loved her in that way? Lexa shook her head trying to clear it of that last question, of course she still loved Costia.

“What is going on with us? This is the first time we see each other in months, we barely talk anymore. Now that we are together you don’t want me here?”

“I didn’t say that. I am happy to see you, but…. I don’t know.”

“Do you and Nia have something going on?”

Costia didn’t answer right away which made Lexas stomach drop.

“She has feelings for me, I don’t know what I feel for her.”

“Are you serious?” Lexa was mad and so hurt, she felt her heart crack a little.

“She gets in my head Lexa I don’t know, I can’t understand it. She knows what to say to me to make me question everything….. including us.”

Lexa felt the tears coming to her eyes she was trying so hard to fight them but it wasn’t working, she felt a tear roll down her face. Costia grabbed her face and made her look at her.

“Lexa please don’t cry,” Costia began kissing Lexas cheeks trying to stop the tears from flowing, “Please baby I love you, I don’t want to hurt you. I love you.”

Lexas phone was vibrating again, she ignored it. Costia began pressing her lips to Lexas and she let her, she kissed her back, it wasn’t the same, not like it used to be. This kiss was filled with sadness, it felt like goodbye.

Costia licked Lexas bottom lip asking for entrance and Lexa let her. They kissed softly tongues hesitant to press too hard and ruin it. Costia pushed Lexas shoulders to make her lay down, Lexa obeyed and Costia laid on top of her never breaking the kiss.

Costia ran her hand over the exposed skin between Lexa pants and her shirt which had ridden up just a little, it caused her to shiver. She felt the heat forming between her legs. Costia kissed her with more purpose shifting her body so that one of her legs was between Lexas. Lexa needed that pressure, she tried to grind upwards begging Costia for more.

Her phone was buzzing again, except this time Costia could feel it too, it made her pause.

Lexa sighed frustrated, she moved Costia a bit so she could get into her back pocket to see what was so important. Costia began to kiss Lexas neck again.

Clarke: I need you.

Clarke: Lexa Please.

Missed Call: Clarke

Lexa tensed, Clarke didn’t seem like the kind of person who asked for help. Lexa sat up quickly surprising Costia who jumped away. “Lexa what’s wrong?”

“I need to call someone back, give me a minute.” Lexa jumped to her feet and made her way to the bathroom clicking to call Clarke back. It barely rang once before Clarke answered.

Lexa could hear the girl struggling to breathe and the constant sniffling. “Clarke? Clarke? Clarke?! Say something please you’re scaring me!” She heard some more sniffles and a deep breathe.

“He came back.”

Lexas heart dropped.

“No.”

**Clarkes POV**

Clarke and Octavia just stared at eachother, both jumping as Finn banged on the door.

“Come on just open up!”

Octavia stepped closer to the door, “Go the fuck away Finn no one wants you here!”

“No one is talking to you Octavia, mind your damn business, Clarke come on lets talk in private we can fix this.” Clarke and Octavia didn’t respond. Finn began pounding on the door again. Clarke was shaking. Octavia walked over to her and put her arms around her.

“Clarke!” Followed by more banging.

“Go away Finn, I don’t want to talk to you or anything to do with you please!”

“Clarke baby you don’t mean that, you’re confused.” He seemed to be waiting for a response and when he didn’t get one he kicked the door.

“Finn if you don’t leave I will call the police, do you understand me?”

“You wouldn’t do that to me.”

“Don’t test me.”

 “I won’t give up on you babe not while I think we still have a chance.”

Clarke heard what sounded like footsteps walking away from the door. She breathed a sigh of relief. She couldn’t keep going through this. Octavia poked her in the side.

“You okay Griff?”

 Clarke nodded, he will give up eventually.

“Come on lets just stay in tonight and hang out.”

Clarke shook her head, “No, I’m not going let him ruin our night.”

Octavia smiled at that, “You sure.”

Clarke walked to her closet, “What should I wear?”

That’s how they ended up at some party two hours later with Clarke being four strong drinks in and flirting with a dirty blonde, who happened to be a girl.

“Well well well, what a pretty little blonde you are.”

Clarke was leaning back against a wall while the other woman hovered in front of her closer than she actually needed to be. Clarke smiled, “You’re not so bad yourself.”

She twirled a strand of the girls hair around her finger. “Why have I never seen you before Clarke?”

“Maybe you weren’t paying attention, maybe I was hiding and didn’t want anyone to find me.”

“So you want to be found?” The girl step even closer to Clarke their Chests were pressed together when she spoke her lips brushed Clarkes ears making her breathe catch.

Clarke nodded, and then next thing she knew she felt lips on her neck making her legs go weak. Well if she was being honest she didn’t know if it was because of what the girl was doing or if she was just too drunk, that didn’t matter though not right now.

Clarke moaned as the girl sucked harder on her neck, Clarke closed her eyes, she saw green. Shit. She moved the girl away from her.

 “Sorry, I thought we were on the same page.” The girl had her hands up in surrender, making Clarke smile and feel guilty.

“We were, I just can’t, I’m sorry.”

Clarke walked away from her, looking around for Octavia, but she couldn’t find her.

Clarke: Heading home, tired.

She tried not to stumble on her way back to her room. Clarke had fun flirting with the other girl but she wasn’t Lexa. She wanted Lexa.

Clarke was so into her own thoughts that she didn’t see Finn sitting outside her door. She froze when she spotted him but he was faster than her and she was drunk.

“I knew you’d have to come back.”

“Finn please don’t, I just want to go to bed, I’m tired.” Clarke was tired but being next to Finn made her physically sick.

“Why don’t you want me anymore?”

“Finn, we are done that’s it.”

“You want her.”

“Yes.” Clarkes eyes widened she didn’t mean to say that. Shit she didn’t mean to say that. Next thig she knew she was pushed against a wall.

“She will never want you Clarke! Who else could possibly want you but me? You’re mine.”

Finn put his hand around her neck, not enough to actually choke her but enough so she knew if he wanted to he could.

“Finn stop, please.” He brought his mouth closer to her face.

“You stupid bitch, she…will…never….want…you. She will never…have… you.” In every break he slammed her head against the wall, Clarke began to see black spots in her vision. Finn released her then and she fell to the ground.

He bent down next to her, “No one will love you but me, you drive me crazy, I hate you, I love you, I will have you.” With that he lifted her chin and bit her lip until it bled. “I love you princess.” Finn got up and walked away leaving her in the hall.

When Clarke felt like she could stand without passing out she went into her room. She took out her phone.

Lexa: Done not talking to me Clarke?

Clarke: I need you.

She waited five minutes but she couldn’t calm down, she couldn’t breathe.

Clarke: Lexa?

Again she tried to wait but the tears began to fall down her face, she was losing it. She clicked to call Lexa but she didn’t pick up. She was drunk her mind was messing with her, Finn was right Lexa would never want her. But right as she thought that her phone lit with a call, Lexa.

She picked up and tried to calm herself down enough to tell Lexa everything that happened. She left out the part that was about her, Lexa was her FRIEND.

Once she stopped talking she heard Lexas loud breathing.

“Lexa?”

“He can show up at your room any minute.” It was a statement so Clarke didn’t say anything.

She heard what sounded like a knock on a door, Lexa must have covered the mouth piece because she heard a very muffled, “ I need a minute Costia.”

Clarke stomach dropped. “I’m sorry I interrupted your weekend Lexa, it was rude of me I should go.” She went to hang up but Lexa stopped her.

“No Clarke wait, shit, stay in your room. I will come home early tomorrow and we will figure something out.”

“You’re coming back tomorrow? Why?”

“I just am alright…..”

“Okay. So I will see you tomorrow?”

“Yes…. And Clarke?”

“Yes Lexa?”

“Stay safe in your room, I don’t want anything to happen to you…. I don’t know what I would do.”

“I will…. Thank you Lexa.”

“Yeah, are you going to be okay?

“Yes,” Clarkes heart dropped with what she was about to say, “Enjoy your night with your girlfriend.”

Lexa just grunted at that and said, “Goodnight, call me if anything else happens.”

“Goodnight Lexa.” Clarke hung up before her drunk self could say anything else.

**Lexas POV**

Lexa walked out of the bathroom, Costia was sitting on the bed waiting for her. “Is everything okay?”

Lexa shook her head, “I have to go back to school as soon as possible, whats the first bus in the morning?”

Costia stood up, Lexa could see the anger in her body, “Are you fucking kidding me Lexa? You come here acting as if you’re here to fix all our problems and not even eight hours later and you’re walking away from me?!”

Costia had a right to be upset, Lexa knew this but she needed to go home, Clarke needed her and Lexa felt in her heart how much more important that was to her at this moment in time. “I have to go home Costia, she needs me.” Seeing Costias body language, Lexa knows she said the wrong thing.

“She?! She?! Who the fuck is she Lexa?! You talk about me with Nia, seems like you have your very own whore.” Lexa shook her head grabbing Costias hand trying to get her to look at her.

“She’s my friend, she going through a lot. I can help her.” Costia closed her eyes and nodded she went to the bed and turned her back to Lexa.

“I can’t do this right now, I have practice early and you have a 7am bus to catch. Goodnight Lexa.”

Lexa nodded even though Costia couldn’t see. She didn’t know what to do though, it was one in the morning. It’s not like she could leave that very second. Lexa just stood their awkwardly.

Costia turned over and looked at Lexa, “Come here.”

Lexa walked over to the bed, Costia patted the spot next to her.

“Best friends first. Go to sleep Lex.”

Lexa laid on the bed, her and Costia made sure not to touch each other. Lexa could only think about Clarke still. She picked up her phone.

Lexa: You okay?

She didn’t wait very long before she got a response.

Clarke: Thanks to you, Yes.

Lexa smiled sadly.

Lexa: Goodnight.

Clarke didn’t text her after that she hoped that it meant the blonde had been able to fall asleep. She closed her eyes hoping she could sleep too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!! Hope yo enjoyed..   
> Honestly I'm exhausted but I promised I would get this up, I will probably have to go in tomorrow to look for grammatical errors. Goodnight! Lol


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa and Costia talk. Lexa and Clarke meet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy! It is a pretty chill chapter.

**Lexas POV**

Her alarm went off, she felt like she had barely slept at all. She rolled over and felt Costia next to her. Lexa opened her eyes and they met Costias in the dark.

“You have to go soon if you want to get to your bus in time.” Lexa nodded she reached out and cupped the other girl cheek who leaned in automatically.

“Costia.”

Costia shook her head. “ I know….We need some time apart.”

Lexa just nodded, “I still love you.”

“I love you too, but I need to figure out whats going on with my head, and I can’t string you along for the ride it isn’t fair.” Lexa thought about that for a minute, Cos was right, Lexa knew she loved her but she didn’t know in what way.

“While you figure out what you need with your head, I need to figure out what I want with my heart. I love you I always will, but I don’t know if it’s the same anymore. We barely have time together… what we had going wasn’t a real relationship anymore. “

Costias eyes began to water at Lexas words, causing Lexas heart to ache. She pulled Costias face close to hers and pressed a kiss softly to her lips. Neither of them moved to deepen the kiss, this was their goodbye. Three years, who knew if they could ever find their way back to each other. Lexa stopped the kiss pressing their foreheads together.

She nodded her head and got out of the bed. She got her stuff together and started walking to the door when she looked back at Costia who had sat up and watching her. Lexa turned to leave when she heard Costia scrambling behind her.

She turned to see what she was doing and was caught by surprise when Costia had her around the waist and was hugging her with what felt like all her might.

“Maybe one day we will be together again Lex. But if not, you are and forever will be my best friend, please don’t let that change.”

Lexa nodded, hugging the girl back. “I won’t.” She pressed a kiss to her head before turning her body away and walking out the door, before Costia could see the tears that had found themselves rolling down her cheeks.

She knew that the breakup was needed, she really did, but it still hurt. It made her want to run and never stop running. Costia had been a constant in her life for so long, six years to be exact, she would have to learn who she was without her, because while they had been best friends before Lexa always felt something more. She got to the bus stop and sighed and shook her head, trying to clear her mind.

The bus pulled up and Lexa stepped on, she found a seat towards the back and looked out the window. She didn’t expect to see what she did. Nia was standing near the bus stop leaning against a building, watching as the bus pulled away.

Lexa shivered, that girl seriously gave her the creeps, she didn’t like that Costia and her were so close.

She would need to keep in contact with Costia to make sure she was okay, it wasn’t good for her to let Nia mess with her head so much.

Lexa was exhausted but she was too worried about Clarke to sleep, she wanted to talk to her but she knew it was ridiculously early on a Saturday and she was hopefully sleeping.

Lexa sighed and unlocked her phone opened her photos going to her new album with Clarkes pictures, they calmed her down. Clarke could create beautiful things. Lexa just realized she barely knew anything about Clarke. She doesn’t know her major, her age, if she has brother or sisters, all she knows is Clarke has horrible taste in men. Oh and she’s a cuddler, that last one made her smile.

How could she know so little about someone and feel the urge to protect them so strong. It was a new thing for her, Lexa did not attach herself easily but she was definitely attached to Clarke. Knowing that she had been in trouble and she wasn’t there for her didn’t sit well with her. Lexas eyes bulged, she had known Clarkes two weeks! That was nothing in time, that brat wiggled her way into Lexas life without Lexa noticing, but seemed like she would be there to stay that is if Lexa had any say in the matter.

**Clarkes POV**

 She woke up with her head pounding, she could barely sit up in bed. She needed to puke. Clarke rolled out of her bed and stumbled her way to the bathroom barely making it on time. She sat on the bathroom floor, god she was such a light weight. She felt her lips, it was swollen, she concentrated trying to remember why. Finn. Clarke felt tears come to her eyes again. What was he turning into?

She told him she wanted Lexa, not a good move when your ex boyfriend was turning into a psycho. But she did, she wanted Lexa bad. She missed her like she hadn’t seen her in days yet she saw her yesterday morning in class. She went and sat on her bed and looked around. Octavia never came home last night.

Clarke picked up her phone and started going through messages. Her eyes widened, she saw the texts between her and Lexa. She thought her talking to Lexa last night had been a dream! Did that really mean Lexa was on her way back!? Clarke saw that it was eleven twenty. Lexa just said she would be here early, Clarke wondered what time that meant.

*Knocking*

Clarkes eyes widened, there was no way that was Lexa, she knew that ride from Costias college was like four hours, Lexa wouldn’t leave that early just for her, would she?

“Clarke?”

There was her answer. Clarke jumped off her bed and ran to the door, she threw it open to see the brunette standing there with her fist raised ready to knock again.

Clarkes heart started beating in her chest so hard, she thought it was going to explode.

“You really came.” Lexa just frowned at her. She was so beautiful, everything about her, from her hair in the high bun to her eyes, her mouth, and her jaw. Clarke was staring. She bit her lip and winced, she forgot about the cut already there.

“Can I come on?” Clarke face palmed, she was an idiot.

“Yeah sorry! Um sorry it’s such a mess.” Lexa just walked in and turned around observing the room.

She shrugged. “It’s the same mess that was here Thursday night.”

Clarke pouted looking around her and Octavias room, it seriously was messy. Lexa sat on Clarkes bed and motioned for Clarke to come to her. Clarkes heart started beating fast again, she hoped Lexa couldn’t hear it.

She stood in front of Lexa, whose eyes just searched her up and down. Clarke felt self conscious and started fidgeting. She closed her eyes. She felt a finger on her lips and her eyes shot open. She tried not to move, Lexa was tracing the cut on her lips, she was so close to her now, she had stood up to see Clarke better closer.

Lexas hand traveled to her neck, Clarke forced herself not to close her eyes at the touch but Lexas hands on her were doing things to her body.

“You didn’t tell me about this.” Clarkes eyes furrowed in confusion.

“About what?” She forced herself to walk away from Lexas touch and went to look in a mirror. Her eyes widened in disbelief there was a fucking hickey on her neck. The damn girl at the party had marked her.

Clarke turned back to Lexa who had sat back down. “How did he do that?”

Clarke felt herself start to blush, she couldn’t look Lexa in the eyes. She felt guilty, which was stupid. “Um he didn’t do that, it happened at the party I went to.”

Clarke saw Lexas eyebrows furrow in confusion, which made her blush even harder, she really didn’t want to have to explain. But then Lexas eyes widened.

“Oh…. You met someone?”

Clarke laughed at that. How could she find someone else when she had this kind of reaction to Lexa?

“Not exactly, kind of just had a little fun I guess.”

Lexa nodded. Clarke really looked at her. Something was off it was subtle though she couldn’t figure it out. Clarke kept watching trying to see what was off. She looked at Lexas eyes. Had she been crying?

Lexa wasn’t one to look away, she looked back at Clarke, she was pretty sure Lexa had been crying.

“Lexa are you okay?” Lexas eyes widened, she quickly made her face blank but not fast enough for Clarke to not see.

Lexa nodded, “Yeah, I’m here for you.” Clarke furrowed her brow. Lexa was lying, she could just feel it.

She walked closer and cupped Lexas cheek, Lexa stiffened at first but then she relaxed and leaned her face into Clarkes palm. She closed her eyes. Clarkes heart began to beating super-fast again. She hoped Lexa couldn’t feel it. She looked at Lexas lips, they were perfect. She wondered what they tasted like Clarke closed her eyes too. She bit her lip again and winced.

“Why do you keep doing that?” Clarke snapped her eyes open Lexa was watching her.

“Doing what?” Lexa moved her face away from Clarkes hand, leaving Clarkes palm oddly hovering. She lowered it and began twisting her fingers together.

“Biting your lip even though you’re just hurting yourself.” Clarke couldn’t handle this. What was she supposed to say? I keep biting my lips because I want to kiss you? She couldn’t say anything so she just shrugged and sat down. She began bouncing her leg up and down but when she looked up she saw Lexa watching her with her eyebrows raised. Shit, why did she ever tell her that meant she was nervous?

“So, how is your girlfriend?” Lexa looked away. Lexa NEVER looks away. Something happened.

“Lexa.” Lexa just shook her head at Clarke.

Then the door opened and both of them turned to see Octavia standing there staring. “Hey you two.”

“Hey O. Spent the night at Lincolns?”

“Yeah, I’m going to stay over there again tonight. I just came to pick up some clothes. Why did you leave Clarke, I saw you sneak off with Niylah and then got your text that you were leaving.”

“Niylah!?” Clarke looked up surprised at Lexas outburst.

“Um yeah?” Lexa just looked at her and then back at Octavia with wide eyes.

“Shes such a player…. She would be able to get straights to question themselves though, I guess.” Lexa shrugged but she seemed to really be thinking about it. Clarkes stomach began to feel odd, was Lexa jealous? She could only hope.

“Clarke what happened to you lip?”

Clarke looked up to see Octavia was stepping closer to her. She grabbed her face and studied her closer.

“Her ex.” Octavias eyes widened, she glanced back and forth between Lexa and her.

 “No! When?!” Clarke shrugged “he was waiting outside the door when I got back last night.”

“Shit, I should have been with you. I’m so sorry Clarke.” Octavia pulled her into a hug, she saw Lexa roll her eyes and tried not giggle at it. Lexa was so rude it was funny.

Octavia turned to Lexa. “Lincoln told me you left yesterday to go see Costia, what are you doing here?”

Lexa raised an eyebrow. Clarke began to blush again and looked down.

Octavia waited for an answer. Lexa sighed and shrugged, “Clarke needed me, so I came back.”

Clarke was trying to not show the smile that came to her face at those words. Lexa cared about her, she showed it in coming home for her when she needed someone.

Octavia was looking back and forth between both girls. “You two have barely known each other two weeks, you realize that?”

“What’s your point?” Clarke wanted to know what she meant by stating the obvious.

“It’s kind of not usual for two people to I don’t know do whatever it is you guys are doing so fast.”

Lexa stood up out of nowhere and walked towards Octavia, Clarke grabbed her arm and almost let go when Lexa glared at her but she held on anyway.

**Lexas POV**

Lexa turned and glared at Clarke for grabbing her. She went to pull her arm away and rip into Octavia but she was able to pause and breathe. She didn’t shake Clarke off just in case though. She breathed in deeply and turned to Octavia.

“Did you not meet my brother the same day me and Clarke met?” Octavia looked at her with a question in her eyes.

“Yes.”

Lexa nodded, “But it is okay for you two to be so close in the form of a relationship, but not for me and Clarke to have a friendship?”

“That’s different we have a connection, I’ve never felt like this with anyone before.”

“I have a connection to Clarke, just because I don’t want to get into her pants doesn’t make it less than what you found.” Lexa glanced back at Clarke who had let go of her arm and was pouting for some unknown reason which annoyed her. “Even if she is one of the most annoying people I have ever met.”

Octavia just looked between the two, focusing more in on Clarke. “Right okay, whatever you guys say.”

Octavia walked around the room grabbing clothes well see you guys later.

“Clarke won’t be staying here tonight.”

“I won’t?”

“No, your ex can show up any time he wants to, until he finally leaves you alone or I beat the shit out of him, I don’t think you should stay here alone.”

“So where will she be staying Lexa?”

Lexa just shrugged, “with me again of course.”

Octavia raised an eyebrow at Clarke, “Again? Okay.”

Lexa watched as Clarke turned her attention to the floor and her hair covered her face.

“You two have fun tonight then, see you later.”

Octavia walked out of the room closing the door behind herself.

Lexa turned to Clarke who still hadn’t looked up yet.

“Clarke.”

She looked up, she looked so sad, Lexa frowned. She walked to Clarke and lifted her face so that the blonde would have to look at her.

“What’s wrong?” The blonde just shook her head. “Did I say something wrong? Do you not want to stay with me? I should have asked you first. I’m sorry.” She let go of her face.

“No! I do want to stay with you, sorry I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Thank you for the offer Lexa.”

Lexa nodded, something was wrong with her, she would do her best to figure it out. Clarke walked around the room and began packing a bag for the night. She rubbed her neck making Lexa see the hickey once again.

She frowned at it, she can’t believe Clarke went for Niylah or that Clarke went for a girl at all, she tilted her head to the side studying the blonde. She wondered if Clarke ever saw her that way, she shook the thought away, Clarke wouldn’t like someone like her.

Lexas phone rang.

Costia: Did you make it back okay?

Lexa felt an ache in her chest, she would need to get over this as soon as possible she would not let herself be weak.

Lexa: Yeah I got here a couple of minutes ago.

Costia: Don’t be a stranger Lexa.

Lexa: I won’t.

Clarke was ready and watching her while she was on her phone. “Texting Costia that you made it back okay?” Lexa just nodded in response and she swore she saw Clarke glare at her for a second but then the blonde was back to her blank almost sad looking face.

“Lets head back to my place so you can drop your stuff off, and we can figure out what we are going to do today.”

Clarke just nodded. Something was bothering her and it was really starting to bug Lexa.

“Clarke. Can you stop? I am your friend, I came back here for you, and your being weird now, like I kicked your puppy or something.”

Clarke shook her head. She walked up to Lexa and pressed her lips to Lexas cheek, Lexa closed her eyes enjoying the warmth but Clarke pulled away too fast. “Do you mind if we just stay in today? Will you have a sad day with me Lexa Woods?”

Lexa raised her eyebrows, wondering what a Clarke Griffin sad day entailed. “What kind of day would that be exactly?”

Clarke smiled, “Ice cream, wine, and movies.” Lexa thought about it, she was having her first breakup so that sounded perfect. She smiled and nodded to Clarke who was staring at her. Clarke bit her lip and winced again. Lexa ran her finger along the blonde’s jaw who closed her eyes when Lexas fingers came in contact with her skin.

“You really need to stop doing that Clarke, it won’t heal if you keep breaking the skin again.” Clarke nodded with her eyes still closed. Lexa removed her hand seeing Clarke take a deep breath in.

Clarke opened her eyes and Lexa was taken back by the blue of them, they seemed darker than usual. She stood looking into them until Clarke turned towards the door. She put her hand out for Lexa to take. Lexa studied it for a moment before taking it, she didn’t really hold hands, she shrugged her shoulders to herself and grasped Clarkes hand a little tighter.

It felt comfortable, she was surprisingly okay with being like this with Clarke. She probably wouldn’t be with anyone else, Clarke had her doing things that were so unlike herself but she liked it, She liked being able to do things she would never allow herself to do before.

She released Clarkes hand to readjust her bag and make sure the door was locked, when she turned to face Clarke she was standing next to her waiting.

“So ice cream, wine, and movies? Can we add chocolate to the list?”

“Definitely!” Lexa smiled at Clarkes enthusiasm before she grabbed her hand again. Clarkes smile grew wider. If holding her hand was all it took for Clarke to smile, Lexa would hold it for as long as Clarke wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Boring? Sorry :(   
> Please come back next time? Lol  
> No really let me know what you think!! :D


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ravens story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raven Reyes is awesome. The end.

**Lexas POV**

They were walking towards her room when Lexa decided to invite Raven over too.

Lexa: I’m back, come over and hang out with me and Clarke?

She put her phone in her pocket, and looked at Clarke who was still holding her left hand. Clarke was watching her but the moment they made contact Clarke looked away. Why did she do that? Clarke confused her sometimes, maybe she was doing something wrong. 

Lexa let go of Clarkes hand and adjusted the strap on her bag.

“I invited Raven over to hang with us, you okay with that?”

Clarke looked up at her and smiled, “Yeah I really liked her she seems nice.”

“She is, she’s annoying too, just like you.” Lexa was just trying to tease and get Clarke to look at her and talk to her, but Clarke looked away again.

Raven: You’re back and with Clarke, why and how? But yeah meet you there, need anything?

Lexa decided to just get to the point now so she wouldn’t have to talk about it later.

Lexa: Me and Costia broke up, I don’t want to talk about it.

“What’s your favorite ice cream Clarke?”

She saw Clarke think about it for a second, “Vanilla.”

Lexa tried not to make a face, Vanilla was so boring. She just nodded in response.

Lexa: Can you bring Vanilla ice cream?

Raven. Wow… Ok, we will talk about it later though.

Raven: You don’t like vanilla.

Lexa rolled her eyes. Raven always had something to say.

Lexa: Can you please just get some.

Raven: Yeah I got it be there in like 20.

Lexa put her phone away again, she could feel Clarkes eyes on her again, but she knew if she looked up Clarke would only look away. She smiled to herself, she was going to have fun.

“Your staring again Clarke.” She looked up to see Clarke duck her head down.

“I was not.”

“Yes you were, I can tell when you are, which seems to be quite often, by the way.”

She could see that Clarke had turned red, she laughed out loud, making the blonde smile slightly. She put her hand on Clarkes shoulder and pushed her lightly, “Oh come on I’m only teasing.”

Clarke smiled and nodded, still too quiet for Lexas liking, she was so much more alive before her ex hurt her. She wanted to make her happy again. She looked down and saw Clarke was clenching and unclenching her fingers. Lexa grabbed her hand again and intertwined their fingers, making Clarke look up and give her one of her big smiles.

“Your smile is beautiful, I wish you smiled more.” Lexa almost face palmed, she didn’t mean for it to come out like that. Clarkes eyes just widened, Lexa felt her ears get warm and she just shrugged.

“You don’t smile big very often either, mostly little smirks.” Lexa shrugged, it takes a lot for her to smile. Clarke made her smile a lot though she realized.

“When I have a reason to smile I do, give me a reason and I will.” Okay everything she said sounded flirty or was that just to her? She shook her head.

They arrived at her door and Lexa sighed in relief, she needed to shut the hell up, and a shower would allow that.

She let Clarke into her room and Clarke put her stuff down and just sat on the bed waiting expectantly.

“I’m going to go shower, do whatever you want, if Raven gets here before I am out just let her in.” Clarke nodded.

Lexa went to the bathroom and closed the door, leaning her back against it, she was doing the right thing, and she knew she was. She needed a moment to herself though.

Lexa got undressed and turned the shower on and got in. She stood there thinking about everything that had happened in the last 48 hours. She had found Clarke held up in her room taken her back here, woke up the next morning freaked out about having Clarke there, went to see Costia, broke up with Costia, and was back in her room again where Clarke would once again be spending the night. Lexa shook her head it was crazy, it felt right.

**Clarkes POV**

She sat on Lexas bed as the other girl went to the shower. Clarke laid back and closed her eyes, how she ended up back in Lexas bed already? She just knew she felt better here than anywhere else, she wanted to be with Lexa.

Clarke sighed and laid back, she needed to push her feelings to the side, Lexa was being a good friend to her, Clarke didn’t want to take advantage, but she couldn’t help the way she felt every time Lexa touched her.

God the handholding was killing her inside. She could tell Lexa wasn’t the kind of person who held hands with just anyone, or even touched people unnecessarily but she did it with her and she loved it. It shot tingles up her arm, and when she let go she felt so disappointed.

Clarke looked over and noticed a picture frame, she rolled over to reach for it was of a very beautiful girl, she was tan and had amazing dark curly hair. Lexa wasn’t kidding when she said she like brunettes. Physically Clarke and Costia had nothing in common, it made her sad to think that she wasn’t Lexas type. She really had no chance.

Suddenly there was a knocking on the outside door making her jump. She had forgotten about Raven.

“Coming!” She ran out the door so Raven wouldn’t have to wait any longer. She opened the door and saw the brunette standing on the other side smirking at her.

“Well hello there Clarke Griffin.” She walked past Clarke and put some ice cream in the freezer before turning and walking towards Lexas room. Raven seemed to be very comfortable here, which only annoyed Clarke.

Raven threw herself onto Lexas bed and grabbed the remote, “Lexa!!! Hurry the hell up!” Clarkes eyeas widened at Ravens words.

She sat down next to her, Raven was studying her seriously, she wasn’t acting like the fun girl she was just days before.

“Is everything okay Raven?”

Raven just nodded, “You like her don’t you?”

Clarkes jaw dropped open, no no no no no. How could everyone tell? Did she literally drool on Lexa or something and didn’t notice?

“Who?” She tried to feign ignorance.

Raven rolled her eyes, “You know I’m talking about Lexa don’t act stupid.”

Clarke felt herself get angry, she was tired of people telling her what she felt (even if it was true.)

“Why do people keep assuming that? Why can’t we just be friends, kind of messed up you know, just because she is gay doesn’t mean something is always happening with her and a girl.”

“I didn’t say anything about you guys getting together, I asked you about you and that’s it, I know Lexa I don’t need to ask you about her.”

Clarke glared at her and turned away.

“You getting so defensive answers my question by the way. Don’t even think about taking advantage of her kindness.”

Clarke went to say something but the bathroom door opened so she just nodded at Raven and turned to see Lexa standing there. IN A FUCKING TOWEL! She physically had place her face on her palm to keep her jaw from dropping. She turned her head a little so she wouldn’t stare and saw Raven watching her and raising an eyebrow and smirking at her. Clarke just glared and stuck her tongue out making Raven burst out into laughter.

“What’s so funny Reyes?” Raven just smiled at Clarke, winked, and got up to go over to Lexa. Clarke watched her curiously, Raven walked over to Lexa and put her hands on the girls waist, she leaned in and placed a kiss on Lexas cheek.

Clarke jumped up and clenched her hands ready to pull Raven off of Lexa right away.

“How you doing beautiful?” Lexa just pushed Ravens hands away and wiped her cheek.

“Ew Raven don’t be weird.” Clarke relaxed at Lexas response, but a little too late, Raven saw how she had reacted and just laughed all over again.

“I’m just fucking with you, get your ass dressed no one here wants to see you naked.”

Lexa rolled her eyes, “You guys can’t handle me anyway.” She winked at both of them. She went to her drawer and grabbed some clothes before heading back to the bathroom.

Raven made her way back to Clarke and shoved her shoulder lightly laughing, “You got it bad, but at least you have good taste.” Clarke rolled her eyes again grabbing a pillow and burying her face in it. She heard the bathroom door open but kept her face buried.

She jumped when she felt a hand on her back, she looked up to see Lexa looking at her questioningly. She smiled and just nodded at Lexa who nodded in return and sat between her and Raven who was still smirking.

“So Lexa….”

“No Raven.”

That confused her she looked between both girls who were glaring at each other, Raven glanced at her and looked back at Lexa nodding slightly.

Lexa turned to her relaxing her face from the glare she had been giving Raven. “Okay what do you want first chocolate, ice cream, or wine? “

Clarke thought for a moment and then smiled, “All at once?”

Lexa smiled lightly, “I like the way you think, come on let’s get everything.”

Lexa and Clarke stood to go but Raven stood on the bed, “I will wait here.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and tilted her head for Clarke to follow her.

Clarke watched as Lexa moved around the kitchen grabbing everything they would need, she couldn’t take her eyes off of her. Lexa had put on baggy sweat pants and a black tank top. When she reached up high to grab something her shirt lifted showing a bit of skin. Clarke wanted to run her fingers along the exposed skin.

“Your staring Clarke.”

Clarke jumped, “I wasn’t staring at you, I was just thinking.”

Lexa turned and faced her, “Thinking about what?”

Shit she had to come up with something quick. “What happened to Ravens leg?”

Lexa glared at her for a moment surprising Clarke, her face softened. “That isn’t my story to tell, you want to know ask her.”

“Ask her what?” Clarke turned to see Raven leaning on the wall, shit she didn’t really want to ask her that would be rude. Right?

Oh gosh, Clarke began shaking her leg. Raven just kept watching her waiting, Lexa walked over to her and placed her hand on Clarke’s leg making her miss a breath. “Just ask her, she won’t tell you if she doesn’t want to.”

Clarke looked at Raven who was waiting expectantly. “What happened to your leg?”

Raven looked to Lexa raising her eyebrow, Lexa just shrugged in response and began making her way back to the room with everything they needed.

Raven turned and followed her, leaving Clarke alone until she got up and followed the other two.

Raven sat cross legged on the floor she motioned for Clarke to sit across from her so she did. Lexa poured them all wine and passed it out before sitting next to both girls creating a triangle.

Raven looked at Lexa expectantly. “You trust her?” Lexa turned and studied Clarkes face making her nervous but she wouldn’t break eye contact, she focused in on the green holding her breathe.

Lexa nodded and turned back to Raven, “I trust her.” Raven nodded and turned to Clarke.

“I was dating this guy named Finn.” Clarkes heart beat picked up automatically, shit Raven sounded like she was going to tell her everything. “Finn Collins, he goes here, we met freshman year. We dated about two years total. The first year and half was perfect, he was always so nice and I think that’s what made me take the end so hard….” Raven stopped talking and looked to Lexa who nodded at her and scooted closer to Raven putting a hand on her knee, Raven nodded too.

He began drinking more than usual I didn’t think much of it really, but we went out one night and got into a fight he was driving his car.” Finn didn’t have a car, so that kind of confused Clarke for a moment but she focused back in.

“It was a stupid fight,” Raven looked at Lexa again and then back to Clarke, “He didn’t like Lexa, he thought she was a bitch and didn’t want me to be friends with her anymore. I have known Lexa since seventh grade, they never got along. I refused to stop talking to Lexa she is my best friend.”

Clarke turned to see Lexa who had let go of Raven, she was sitting so tense and staring at the floor with such anger. Clarke scooted closer and grabbed Lexas hand intertwining their fingers and giving Lexa a little squeeze. Lexa glanced up and gave Clarke a thankful look. “Raven, Lincoln, Costia, and Anya have been the only constants in life, they are my family.”

Clarke turned back to Raven who was staring at their hands in surprise, when she noticed she had both girls attention again she continued. “So he was drunk and started driving crazy, I asked him to let me out of the car but he refused, that was the last thing I remember. Next thing I know it’s three days later and I’m waking up in a hospital bed with Lexa sitting next to me fast asleep. Finn crashed into a pole. A piece of metal had gotten into my spine and now I can’t feel anything in this leg.”

Raven was tapping on the leg with the brace on it. “He didn’t come visit me in the hospital, I thought he felt guilty, when I was released he came around. He just watched me though never really talking much. Then one day he got drunk and came over he told me it was my fault he crashed the car. When he was sober he was kind and quiet but when he drank he would say mean things like that and about Lexa.”

Raven sighed reliving everything seemed to be hard for her. “Lexa told me over and over again that I needed to leave him that I deserved better but I knew who he could be so I was waiting for that guy to come back to me. About three months ago he stopped drinking as much, I thought I saw the old Finn coming back to me, he was finally happy again. Turns out he was fucking someone else and that’s what made him so happy. I should have known, he never looked at me the same way after the accident.”

Clarke felt guilty but she didn’t know about Raven before she’s not the kind of girl who wants to be the other woman. “He had the nerve to come here to the party you and Lexa met at, said he was sorry and that he loved me but it got too hard, me being like this was too hard but he is the one who did this to me in the first place, he is the one who treated me like crap for months but I took it because I loved him. He left me telling me found someone else.”

Raven stopped talking for a bit and they all just kind of stared at each other. Clarke was surprised when Lexa began talking. “He called her on Wednesday, I picked it up and he freaked out on me saying I was the reason she left him that since I came along things had changed. I knew Raven way before he came along it didn’t make sense but he kept swearing he would get her back and wouldn’t let me stand in the way. He is delusional.”

Clarke stopped listening, Finn wasn’t talking about Raven when he called, he was talking about her. Was he threatening Lexa? What had she done? That was before she even admitted to him that she wanted Lexa, what would he do now? Clarke watched Lexa, she couldn’t let anything happen to her, she had to keep her away from Finn. She began running her thumb over the back of Lexas hand, she wouldn’t let Finn come close to this woman who was so bent on protecting her.

“Clarke.” She looked up at the sound of her name, Raven was trying to get her attention.

“Yeah?”

“So what happened to your lip?”

Clarke thought about it for a second and decided to tell Raven the truth but she left out Finns name while talking. She couldn’t let them know, she might lose Lexa if she told them the truth now. She couldn’t lose her just because she was Finns “other woman.”

** Lexas POV**

While Clarke talked Lexa got up and began serving them ice cream, this turned out to be a lot deeper than she thought it was going to be. She couldn’t hear Clarke talk about what happened to her without getting angry. But this was good both girls needed to talk about the things they had been through. She sat down right as Clarke had finished talking and passed the girls ice cream.

“Why don’t you call the cops?”

Lexa had to admit that the idea had crossed her mind and she was going to talk to Clarke about it but Raven beat her to the punch.

Clarke just shrugged moving the ice cream around her bowl, “I didn’t think he would ever be like this, he was so kind and gentle before. If he comes around again I will call them though, I won’t let him touch me again.

“I won’t let him touch you again.” Clarke lifted her head and smiled at Lexa nodding her head at what she had said. She meant it, she wouldn’t let Clarke get hurt again.

“Her roommate is dating Lincoln and she has been spending most of her time over there, I don’t want Clarke alone there so she’s staying here tonight.”

Raven nodded and turned to Clarke, “Don’t think you get to take my side of the bed permanently Griffin, I will always be Lexas favorite.”

Lexa just rolled her eyes, “Shut up Raven, no one’s trying to replace you, your annoying ass is one of a kind.”

Raven put her hand over her heart, “Oh my god Lexa that may be the sweetest thing you have ever said to me.”

Lexa shoved her as she stood up, turning to pull Clarke up too, and pulling her towards the bed. “What movie do you guys want to watch?”

“You help the girl with two working legs up but not me?! I see how it is Alexandria Woods.”

Lexa glared at her, “If I helped you up you would have yelled at me, and call me that again I dare you.”

Raven shrugged, “You may be right, and don’t challenge me Woods.”

Raven got up and moved towards the bed, Lexa went to fake kick her and Raven jumped back. Clarke began laughing which made Lexa smile automatically, she thinks that is going to be her new favorite sound.

Clarke climbed over her, making her heart stop when the blonde straddled her lap for a moment before moving off to sit between her and Raven. “Apparently you two need to be kept separated.”

Lexa smiled, “Hey Clarke what happened to your neck?”

Lexas smile fell instantly, fucking Niylah. She shook her head she can’t believe Clarke went for Niylah, for some reason it annoyed the shit out of her. Maybe she was jealous... She thought about it for a second... nah she couldn't be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Let me know :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sleepover #2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoy, sorry it took so long!!

** Lexas POV**

They had decided to watch The Purge, Raven loved it, it was one of her favorite movies, Lexa liked it too so it sounded like a good idea. That is until twenty minutes in when Clarke began screaming and trying to hide behind her.

She was amused that Clarke was such a softy but it was also so….. extra.  The little boy had just let the stranger into the house when Clarke grabbed Lexas arm and kept repeating, “Nope bad idea, don’t do it, you’re going die!” Slowly Clarke had been inching herself behind Lexa forcing Lexa off of the wall they had all been leaning on.

She was seriously uncomfortable. “Clarke just shut it and watch the movie.” Clarke glared at her and then fully climbed behind her putting one leg on each side of her, Lexa sighed. Whenever the music or screen got dark Clarke hid her face in Lexas shoulder.

“Clarke, I don’t know if you’re actually scared or just trying to find a reason to hold Lexa.” Clarke kept her face hidden in Lexas shoulder and just raised her middle finger in Ravens direction making both girls laugh.

Lexa couldn’t sit this way if she didn’t relax into Clarke but she had been avoiding it for about ten minutes. She wasn’t the kind of person who cuddled with her friends, this would definitely be cuddling. She pouted lightly, her back hurt. Fuck it she was going for it.

Lexa put her hands on Clarkes knees and leaned back until she felt her back hit Clarkes chest making Clarke lean her back against the wall. Finally her back had seriously been hurting. This was a lot more comfortable than she thought it would be, she could feel Clarkes chest rising and falling it seemed strained like the girl was gasping. She tilted her head to the side to see Clarke had her eyes closed, but there was nothing remotely scary happening on the screen.

“Hey, you okay? Need me to move?”  Clarke opened her eyes, they were super dark again. Clarke shook her head and wrapped her arms around Lexas stomach pulling her in tighter.

Lexa felt Clarke breathe her in, she closed her eyes enjoying the closeness, it felt good to let someone hold her something she rarely let ever happen.

Lexa turned and saw that Raven was watching them, she had her eye brows raised and looked suggestively between them focusing in on Clarkes hands that were wrapped around Lexa. Lexa just shrugged in response.

“Not fair I want cuddles too!” Lexa felt Clarke laugh, she rolled her eyes at that but grabbed a pillow and placed it on her and Clarkes legs gesturing for Raven to lay her head down. Raven jumped up excited and layed on the pillow.

Lexa took out Ravens pony tail and began running her fingers through the girls hair. Raven loved when people played with her hair, it always calmed her down, something Lexa had picked up on over the years.

This position was comfortable until Clarke got scared again. Now she hid her face in Lexas neck, making Lexas eyes close. Her neck was her spot and every time Clarke hid her face her breathing was driving her crazy. This was awkward as hell. Lexa had to get away from this. She pressed Ravens shoulder motion for her to get up.

Lexa was about to move to get up when something scary must have happened on screen because Clarke tightened her arms around Lexa and pressed her face back into her Neck, but this time Lexa swore she felt Clarke lightly press her lips to her neck. Lexa felt her entire shiver at the feeling of it.

Lexa couldn’t her eyes snapped open. She jumped up so fast that both girls looked at her life she was crazy.

“Umm I have to use the bathroom.” She jumped off the bed and walked to the bathroom closing the door behind her. She turned on the water and just sat on the floor, pressing her forehead to her knees. She needed to get her shit together, she was being a pervert, her body reacting without her consent.

She just needed to take care of herself… but Clarke was spending the night. She wouldn’t have the chance until she got some time alone. This was going to be difficult. She stood up and splashed her face with water.

“Get your shit together Woods.” She flushed the toilet before stepping out of the bathroom and heading back to her FRIENDS.

**Clarkes POV**

She hated scary movies, like really hated them. She should have said something earlier, she was literally hiding behind Lexa. She was probably being annoying but she didn’t care enough. Plus Lexa was letting her so she wasn’t going to give that up.

When Lexa laid her back into her Clarke thought she was going to explode, her heart began beating like crazy, she just hoped Lexa couldn’t feel it. Clarke hadn’t realized she was holding her breath until she gasped for air. She tried to catch her breathe from holding it so long and closed her eyes to concentrate on that.

When Lexa asked if she wanted her to move the first thing in Clarkes mind was the word never. Thankfully she didn’t say it out loud. She circled her arms around Lexa and pulled her in tighter hoping Lexa wouldn’t pull away, when Lexa didn’t Clarke couldn’t help but breathe in the scent that was Lexa.

Clarke felt annoyed when Raven laid on their legs and Lexa began playing with her hair. How she could be jealous while actually having Lexa in her arms and pressed against her blew her mind. She had it bad, really bad.

When she got scared again she hid her face in Lexas neck. She wanted to kiss her. Each time Clarke hid in Lexas neck she breathed her in and each time the need to kiss her grew.

Raven began getting up and Clarke pressed her face into Lexas neck one more time, except this time she couldn’t control herself she pressed her lips quickly to Lexas neck.

She thought she felt Lexa shiver a little but next thing she knew Lexa was up and practically running to the bathroom. Shit she hoped she didn’t freak Lexa out, she didn’t want to lose their friendship. Clarke placed her face in her hands and rubbed her eyes, she needed to control herself, why was she such a fuck up?

“You’re so thirsty Griffin.” Clarke turned to see Raven watching her. “And Lexa is so oblivious, it is sad really.”

“Shut it Raven.”

“I’m just saying you are not good at hiding what you want.”

Clarke tried to focus in on the movie but she was still scared so she scooted closer to Raven so she could hide behind her while Lexa was gone.

“Wow you actually are scared, I thought you were just trying to find a reason to have Lexa all over you.” Clarke shoved her shoulder but quickly pulled her back when she heard the background music get creepy.

Clarke peeked her head up when she heard the bathroom door open to see Lexa making her way back to the bed, but she stopped at the edge and sat on the floor leaning against the bed.

Clarke frowned, she fucked up. She turned to Raven and whispered, “Is she mad at me?”

Raven just looked at Lexa studying her for bit, “No, she has other things she is dealing with at the moment.”

“Like what? I could tell something was wrong with her earlier but she wouldn’t say.”

“It is not my business to tell.” With that Raven turned back to the television and focused back in on the movie.

Clarke wasn’t paying attention anymore though she was focused on watching Lexa, who was sitting so stiffly now, like she was incapable of relaxing.

Lexa must have a sixth sense for when Clarke was watching her because she turned her head out of nowhere and met Clarkes gaze. Clarke motioned for Lexa to come back to the bed but Lexa just shook her head with a small smile, and seemed to blush, turning back to the screen.

Clarke zoned out then just thinking about what could possibly be bothering the brunette.  She didn’t like it, she wanted Lexa closer, and she felt safe with her. She just had to control her attraction to the girl but honestly the wine was having its effect on her because Clarke just wanted to touch her in any way Lexa would allow. Costia be damned, Clarke didn’t know her, did she really care?

But then she looked at Raven, she cared. She sighed loudly making both girls look at her she just shrugged in response. She couldn’t ruin someones relationship because she was being selfish, because she wanted someone she couldn’t have, who didn’t want her. She had already unknowingly hurt Raven, even though she was sure it was what was best for the girl. She couldn’t do it on purpose. Clarke grabbed her cup and quickly finished her wine.

She was still thinking about Lexa, except she was starting feel really nice now. She crawled towards the bottom of the bed, nut felt an arm grab hers. Raven shook her head at her trying to stop Clarke but Clarke just shook her off and made her way to Lexa.

“Lexaaaaaa.” Lexa turned her head seeming to be surprised by how close they were. Clarke took her index finger a poked Lexas nose earning a confused glare.

“Are you seriously drunk already Clarke?” Clarke thought about it for a moment before nodding her head enthusiastically.

“Mhm. But Lexa we are friends right? You want to be my friend?” Lexa nodded her head at Clarkes questions looking at her question in her eyes.

“But what if I want to be more than friends?” Lexas eyes widened and she looked to Raven, who Clarke saw had the same face. “What if I want to be best friends?”

Clarke busted out laughing, she just thought she was so hilarious. She didn’t let it show how her heart felt a little pang with Lexas reaction before Clarke had elaborated on her question.

“Wow blondie, I’m her best friend.” Clarke laughed seeing Raven get all defensive about her title. Raven started crawling to the bottom of the bed towards them.

“I’m not asking you Raaaaaven, I’m asking Lexa, besides someone can have more than one best friend anyway. Right Lexa?”

Lexa was just looking between Raven and Clarke with a confused face. She was the cutest thing Clarke had ever seen. She wasn’t answering her question though so Clarke began to pout at her.

Lexa rolled her eyes, “You can be my other best friend Clarke.”

Clarke saw Raven glaring at Lexa, “Took us years for you to call me your best friend and she gets the title in two weeks,” She crossed her arms, “that’s bull crap.”

Lexa just shrugged at Raven and started playing with her hair again making Raven lay down and relax, “Not fair, you know how to make me forgive you.”

Lexa nodded, “I know what to do because you Raven are my oldest bestfriend.

“Fuck yeah I am.” Raven pumped her fist in the air.

The girls watched movies for the rest of the day thankfully none of the others were scary, so Clarke actually got to enjoy them.

After watching Moulin Rouge which happened to be Clarkes favorite movie ever, Raven got up and began stretching her leg. Clarke looked towards the window surprised to see the sun had gone down. She picked up her phone and saw that it was 11 pm.

She looked around the room noticing the mess of the pizza boxes which they had ordered earlier, and their cups, and bowls were all around the room. She knew Lexa was a clean person so this must be driving her crazy.

Clarke got up and began trying to clean the room up, Lexa and Raven quietly joined her. In about fifteen minutes the room was back to being clean.

“I better go, are you going to practice now that you are back? Does Indra know you’re back?”

“She doesn’t know I’m back but I will probably go still, we have that game Wednesday, are you still coming to it?”

“Have I ever missed a game?”

Clarke watched as Lexa smiled and shook her head at Raven who was putting her sweater on.

“Alright, sorry girls but the life of the party is out of here.” Clarke rolled her eyes but waved as Raven walked out of the room.

Clarke turned to Lexa who had sat on the bed and was going through the channels on the television. Clarke made her way to what she thought of now as her side of the bed. “What time do you have practice?”

Lexa looked at Clarke over her shoulder, “Seven.” Clarkes eyes widened in surprise.

“On a Sunday?”

“Shouldn’t you know this already, you live with Octavia?”

Clarke just shrugged in response, “I’m never up when she leaves, I prefer sleeping in until like eleven.”

“I should have known you were the lazy type.”

Clarke threw a pillow at Lexa, “I am not lazy.” That earns her one Lexas signature smirks.

Clarke gets up to grab her bag and change into her pajamas. She has a tank top with her pajama shorts, like really short shorts. She can practically see her ass, but she just shrugs and walks back to the bed.

She climbs in next to Lexa who got under the covers already. Clarke snuggles in and closes her eyes, the bed still smells like Lexa. She could get used to this. Her eyes pop open when she hears her phone vibrate.

She reaches over and grabs it.

Finn: I’m sorry about yesterday, I was drunk. I know it isn’t a good excuse but that is all I have. Where are you?

Clarke quickly unsaves his number so that his name won’t pop up anymore.

Lexa turns over and looks at her, “You okay?”

“Yeah just the ex.” She passes her phone to Lexa so she can read the text. Lexa rolls her eyes.

“I hope you don’t even consider seeing him again or talking to him.”

Clarke shakes her head fast, “Definitely not, I don’t want anything to do with him.”

Lexa seems to think about this for a moment. “What about Niylah, are you going to keep seeing her?” Lexa is watching her face intently. Clarke just shrugs “we have only hung out once.” She knows she isn’t really answering Lexas question but Lexa nods anyway.

They lay in silence for a while but Clarke wants to talk to her. “Was Costia mad about you leaving early?”

She felt Lexa stiffen besides her but there was no answer. Clarke was about to ask another question when she heard a light sniffle come from Lexa. She froze, was Lexa crying?

“Lexa?” Still Lexa didn’t respond. Clarke sat up and leaned over to see tears silently rolling down Lexas face. “Lexa!?” Clarke tried to get Lexa to roll over and look at her but she wouldn’t, so she decided to climb onto the other side of her even though she would basically be hanging off of the bed.

When Clarke starts climbing Lexa grabs her waist as she almost falls off the bed, this ends with Clarke straddling Lexas waist.

“What are you doing?!”

“You weren’t looking at me, what happened?”

“I don’t want to talk Clarke.”

“Lexa come on, I want to help you, please.”

Lexa is just watching her, Clarke can see her face is still wet from her tears, the sight breaks her heart. She reaches down and wipes Lexas cheeks. Lexa closes her eyes while she does this.

“Please just talk to.. Agh!” She didn’t get to finish her sentence because somehow Lexa had flipped them. Clarkes back was pressed against the bed with Lexa pressing down onto her. That was the sexiest thing she had ever experienced, Clarke held in her moan from having some of Lexas weight on top of her. It took every ounce of her strength to not wrap her legs around her and pull her down closer.

“No, Clarke.” That snapped her out of her mind. No to what, to fucking her right then and there or what? What were they talking about, she couldn’t concentrate. She was trying not to thrust her hips up to get some friction and pressure where she needed it most.

“No what?” Clarke couldn’t breathe she was physically gasping, she felt like if Lexa just touched her she would come unraveled.  Lexa looked at her with questioning eyes.

“Am I crushing you? You’re breathing funny.” Clarke wanted to say no, I just want you more than I have ever wanted anyone else. But she just nodded her head.

She regretted her answer as soon as Lexa moved from between her legs.  She threw her arms over head trying to catch her breathe, feeling how uncomfortable it was going to be to sleep next to Lexa with this need inside of her, not to mention her soaked underwear, she could feel it with every small movement she made.

“I don’t want to talk Clarke. Can we just go to sleep?”

Clarke just nodded still trying to calm herself down. She closed her eyes willing her body calm down. She opened her eyes at another sniffle. She looked and saw Lexa still had tears running down her face.

God she hated herself. She was fucked up. She forgot about everything but the tears going down Lexas face and the ache they caused in her heart.

“You don’t have to talk, but come here.” Lexa just looked at her but moved closer to her. Clarke reached her arm under Lexas neck and moved Lexas head to her chest. Lexa stiffened, making Clarke roll her eyes.

“If you get to take care of me I get to take care of you.” Clarke began running her fingers through Lexas hair. She could feel Lexas tears wetting her shirt and her heart began to ache, she tried her best to hold onto her own tears but she felt like her heart was breaking.

Clarke lets the tears roll down her face, she was crying for Lexa, for whatever was hurting her so bad, she was crying for herself, she was crying for Raven. She must have made a noise because Lexa lifted her head and looked Clarke in the eyes.

She lifted herself onto her elbow and used her free hand to wipes Clarkes tears away. Clarke took the moment to do the same for her. They continued staring into eachothers eyes, until Lexa leaned her head towards Clarkes, she closed her eyes when she felt Lexa press a kiss to her cheek. Clarke opened her eyes and Lexa settled back onto her chest.

She began running her hand through the other girls hair again, she began to drift off. But then she heard a whisper of “Thank you.”

It made her smile, she leaned her head down laying a kiss on Lexas head and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always leave comments I appreciate your feedback and talking with you guys :)


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feelings...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't been updating as much but I should be back to uploading every two or three days so you should have something by Sunday night at the latest. Enjoy this chapter :)

**Clarkes POV**

The week was going by pretty fast and it was actually quite uneventful which Clarke appreciated. Octavia had stayed in the room since Sunday night so Clarke just slept there. Apart of her wished that Octavia would just go spend the night at Lincolns so Clarke would have an excuse to spend the night with Lexa.

She was pretty sure O was doing it on purpose so that Clarke would feel safer at home, which meant a lot to her but…. She wanted Lexa. They had their class but they actually focused now which was good for their grades but no fun. Lexa had a stupid game today so she was mostly busy since last Saturday.

“There will probably be an after party, do you want to go to it?” Clarke looked up from the sketch she had been working on as she saw Octavia getting ready for said game.

It’s a school night O.” Octavia rolled her eyes.

“Okay party was exaggerative the team is meeting up after for dinner and drinks. Do you want to go? I mean you’re going to your first game today might as well go the whole way.”

Clarke blushed, Octavia had been trying to convince her to go to one of her games since last year but she really wasn’t a sports girl. She just wanted to see Lexa play if she was being honest. She missed her, “O, are you staying at Lincoln tonight?”

“No I told you, I’m going to be here for you, I don’t want any more surprises from Finn.” Clarke just nodded her head in response, she had been hoping Octavia would spend the night there so she could tell Lexa and stay with her.

“Where is the after party?”

“At Anyas house again.” That perked Clarke up.

“So at Lexas house?”

Octavia just looked at Clarke and nodded her head.

“I will go.”

“Ofcourse you will.” Clarke glared at her but Octavia just shrugged her shoulders.

“I don’t understand why you like her so much, she is just cold.”

“Don’t Octavia, you don’t know her like I do. She… I don;t know, she is different, in a good way.”

Octavia just watched her. “You seem to be handling your first girl crush well.” She couldn’t have put more sarcasm into it if she tried.

“Shut it Blake she is just my friend.”

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?”

That was it Clarke jumped across the room towards Octavia who squealed and threw her hands up. Clarke grabbed her and swung her to turn around, wrapping one arm around Octavias neck and the other around her waist from behind. “Take it back or.”

She didn’t have a chance to finish because next thing she knew she was on her back on the floor, the wind knocked out of her. Her back fucking hurt.

“What the fuck!? Where did you learn to do that?”

Octavia just laughed above her with her hands on her hips. “Lincoln has been teaching me some things, I may be small but I am fierce Griffin remember that.”

Octavia offered her hand to help her up but Clarke just shook her head, “I think I’m dead.”

Octavia laughed again grabbing her arms and pulling her up. “You’re such a softie.”

Clarke pouted at her. “I am not.”

Clarkes got back up and went to her sketch, she had been drawing the sunset from Ark tower, it was okay.

She took her phone out and snapped a picture sending it to Lexa. Her favorite thing to do was sending Lexa her little sketches, even the stupid little ones.

Clarke: When you can’t quite capture the view 

She put her phone down, and turned to Octavia, “I have to start heading to the field. You going be okay to make it over there by yourself?”

Clarke rolled her eyes, “I’m not a child O, I can take care of myself.”

Octavia walked up to her and pressed a kiss to her temple. “You know what I mean.”

Octavia walked to the door and turned back, “Seriously call me if anything.”

Clarke just nodded and waved for her to leave. She was tired of being treated like a child, she knew Octavia meant well, but it was annoying to have her around basically all the time. How she spent an time with Lincoln she didn’t know.

Lexa: It’s beautiful.

Lexa: Still coming to the game?

Clarke smiled, Lexa appreciated everything that she showed her, and it made her feel good about her art.

Clarke: I wouldn’t miss it.

Clarke: Might go to after party get together too, O invited me. I think she just doesn’t want to leave me alone at night in the room.

Lexa: Then I will see you at my place tonight. She is doing the right thing Clarke.

That made Clarke roll her eyes, Lexa was just as bad as Octavia, but Clarke liked it, whenever she had Lexas attention she loved it, it made her feel special. Especially considering she rarely acted the way she did with her with other people. Raven being the other exception.

She wondered if Lexa and Raven ever had a thing before but shook her head at the idea, probably not.

Clarke: Yeah but I need a break from her.

Lexa: You will tonight with me.

Clarke felt herself get turned on by Lexas text. She scolded herself, she needed to stop this. But her attraction to Lexa was undeniable. She never felt anything like this before in her entire life.

Clarke jumped on her bed and buried her face in her pillow so she could scream. Fucking shit, how was she going to control herself, it felt impossible? But she wanted Lexa in her life, no actually she needed her and if that meant being turned on seventy five percent of the time, she would learn to deal with it.

Clarke laid on her back and removed her jeans and underwear. She closed her eyes and began to run her fingers through her folds, up and down, she loved to be teased, even by herself. But with her eyes closed she could pretend it was someone else. She could pretend it was Lexa. Clarke moaned out loud biting her lip to try and be quiet.

Just thinking her name made Clarkes walls clench when there wasn’t even anything to clench onto…..yet. Clarke kept teasing herself, she moved her right hand up her shirt onto her breast so she could roll her nipple between her fingers.

She needed something inside of her, “Lexa please, I need you, Lex.” Her eyes still closed it was almost as if she could see Lexa grinning at her from the bottom of the bed making her beg for it.

Clarke moved one finger to her opening slowly circling it driving herself mad. She couldn’t take it anymore, she inserted one finger and began moving it in and out, feeling how wet she was and how much wetter she was getting with each thrust.

“Lexa please more.” She gasped and she inserted two more fingers. She began moving faster letting go of her nipple and using the now free hand to run circles around her clit. She was so close, she pressed the hand around her clit harder and began moving it faster. She felt how soaked she was, she felt her walls clamping down around her fingers.

“OH FUCK LEXA!!!”

She screamed her name as she came, still moving her fingers in and out and slowly circling her extra sensitive clit. She felt like she was about to pass out, she had just given herself one of the best orgasms of her life, all with the green eyed beauty on her mind. Clarke moved her hands onto her chest which was rising and falling very quickly.

She looked over at the time.

“Shit, I’m late!”

She got up and ran to bathroom to wipe herself off, she got dressed as quick as she could and ran out the door heading to the Lacrosse field.

She took out her phone and quickly typed out a text to Lexa and Octavia knowing they probably wouldn’t see it until after the game anyway.

Clarke: Running late, got distracted, be there in a few!

When she got to the field she saw the game had already started about ten minutes ago. She wandered up and down the bleachers for a while but couldn’t find a seat. Who knew the schools women’s Lacrosse team was so popular.

“Clarke!?”

She spun around hearing her name, and then she spotted Raven and Lincoln sitting together not too far from her. She walked over to them and saw they had enough space for her too thank goodness.

“Hey guys, I should have figured you two would be here.” She sat down between the two.

“We have to come support our girls!” When Raven said that Clarke felt her jealousy rise again. But she just nodded in response.

“How are they doing? I know nothing about this sport.” Raven just laughed.

“First game?” Clarke just nodded her head, “I wonder why that is.” She winked at her but continued talking. “Lexa is basically the best one on the team, but it’s Lexa so you should have expected it. Your roommate is Octavia right?”

“Yes, is she good?” Lincoln laughed at her when she asked that.

“She is really good, maybe third or fourth on the team, she is a tough girl.” She thought back to Octavia flipping her onto her back and lightly punched Lincoln. “Hey what was that for?”

“You teaching the tough girl fighting moves that she used on me.”

He laughed, “you should just ask Lexa to give you lessons so you can fight her back, Lexa is better than me anyway.”

She thought about that a moment. She knew Lexa acted tough but she didn’t really think it was true.

“Wait so Lexa actually can fight, she isn’t all talk?”

Raven quickly became serious. “Clarke, Lexa is a badass, she may be nice and gentle with you, but she can kick the ass of a man twice her size, it is impressive really and kind of scary.”

Clarke just sat there in silence the rest of the game taking that in, maybe she didn’t have to worry about Lexas safety when it came to Finn.

**Lexas POV**

She walked off the field feeling high. Not only had they won but they kicked ass too! She had scored the first and last goal of the game. She went into the locker room accepting all the congratulations and good jobs from her team. She just really needed a shower so she went straight there. When she remembered that Clarke might be at her house she made sure to wash herself faster.

She missed the blonde even though they saw each other every other day and in fact had seen each other that morning, but they hadn’t spent time outside of class together since Saturday.

She looked at her phone and saw the message from Clarke that she had been running late and rolled her eyes of course she was. But there was also a text from Raven.

Raven: Lincoln, Clarke and I are heading over to yours to wait for you and Octavia. Don’t be too long!

Lexa quickly dressed and looked around for Octavia. She really was trying to be nicer to the girl. She found her tying her shoes on a bench and sat down next to her. Octavia looked up and her eyes widened when she saw that it was Lexa.

“Lincoln and Clarke are waiting for us at my place already, I figured we can walk over together.” Octavia just nodded and looked back down.

“How is Clarke doing?”

“She’s okay, I haven’t really left her alone much for anything to happen. I think she misses you though.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow at this. “She sees me in class all the time.”

“You don’t get it do you?”

Octavia stood up and they began walking together.

“I don’t get what?”

“It isn’t my business to tell Lexa.”

Lexa just shook her head, she didn’t understand what Octavia was trying to get at, so she just changed the subject.

“How are you and Lincoln?”

She could see the visible changes in Octavia just by mentioning Lincoln, it was annoyingly cute.

“SO GOOD, I haven’t gotten to spend much time with him this week between practice and Clarke though.” Lexa just nodded her head. “Ugh I miss the sex already, he so damn good when he.”

“OCTAVIA!!! That’s my brother!!!” Lexa stopped walking and covered her ears glaring at the small girl in front of her. Octavia just widened her eyes realizing what she was about to say.

“Oops, sorry?”

Lexa lowered her hands. “No more talking, I tried and you ruined it.”

The rest of the walk was awkward, every time Lexa felt Octavia watching her she would glare at her until she stopped, thankfully the walk wasn’t too long.

Lexa opened the door knowing it wouldn’t be locked so everyone could come and go as she pleased. She walked in and saw Raven and Clarke sitting on the couch, she strode over and grabbed both of them by their arms and pulled them to her room locking the door behind her.

“I am going to have kill Octavia.”

Clarkes eyes visibly widened, and Raven just laughed at her.

“What did she do now?”

“She thought it would be smart to discuss her and my brothers sex life with me, I literally have no other choice, she must be handled.”

Clarke started laughing along with Raven, “You can’t just kill anyone you want.”

Lexa knew she was over reacting but she just stared as her friends laughed at her which honestly annoyed her. “Yes I can.” That just earned her a head shake along with more laughter. She pushed pass both girls and sat on her bed.

She sat so she wouldn’t have to see them laughing anymore. Why was she friends with them again?

“I’m going to go look for some drinks.” She heard the door open and close. She began absentmindedly rubbing her shoulder which always hurt after a game.

She jumped when she felt hands remove hers and begin kneading. She turned her head to see it was Clarke touching her and she relaxed. Clarke moved onto the bed and sat on her knees behind her so she could easily reach.

“I thought you went with Raven.”

“I rather stay with you.” Lexa just nodded in response, she closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of Clarkes hands on her, it felt so much better than when she did it herself.

“Lexa, how are you and Costia?” Lexa physically stiffened, she still hadn’t told anyone but Raven. Clarke stopped moving her hands, waiting for a response. Lexa sighed and turned her head to look at Clarke who was watching her. She wanted to open up to her, she trusted her.

“We broke up when I was there last weekend.” Clarkes eyes widened.

“But I have seen you text her?” Lexa shrugged.

“She was my friend before we dated,” Lexa closed her eyes. “I will always love her, no matter what.”

She felt Clarkes hands go back to work, she sighed in relief closing her eyes again, thinking the conversation was over.

“Why?” She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

“Why what?”

Why did you guys break up?” Lexa sighed and turned around fully to face the blonde. She could see that Clarke had good intentions.

“It just wasn’t the same anymore, we have been drifting apart for awhile  now, she has someone else.”

Lexa saw the change in Clarkes face automatically. Her eyes changed from soft to hard, she began clenching and unclenching her fists, her cheeks turned red.

“She cheated on you!?” Lexa grabbed Clarkes hands and unclenched them running her hands over Clarkes palms until she felt her relax.

“No, not like that at least, but she does have feelings for someone else and it was just adding to the confusion.”

“No offense Lexa shes a damn idiot.” Lexa released Clarkes hands ready to defend Costia but Clarke kept talking. “Look at you, you’re the most beautiful person I have ever seen or met, inside and out.” Clarke cupped Lexas cheek, but Lexa didn’t relax into it, she was still ready to fight. “How can anyone ever question between being with you and someone else? Whoever ends up with you will be the luckiest person in the world. No ones heart could compare to yours, you have taken care of me without any reason to, you didn’t know me Lex.” Lexa relaxed a little into Clarkes hand listening to everything she was saying trying to take it in. “If I got a chance to be with you I would never let you go not for anything.” Lexa smiled at that, Clarke was sweet.

“Clarke, thank you but it isn’t her fault it just isn’t meant to be, no one is to blame. If only you were into girls huh?” She laughed, “You’re a great friend, I don’t ever want to lose this.” She motioned between the two of them and moved forward to press a kiss to Clarkes cheek, she began to pull away when Clarke pulled her back in, except now their foreheads were pressed together, and Clarke wrapped her arms around her waist. Lexa just left her arms down to the side but didn’t pull away. Being close like this to Clarke felt right, like she was just meant to be in her life.

“Lexa…”

She pulled away when she heard the door was being opened, Raven walked in carrying drinks but paused when she saw how close the two girls still were. Lexa stood up and walked over to Raven grabbing a drink.

She turned to pass Clarke her drink but she was already up. She grabbed the drink and walked to the door, Lexas eyes widened as she saw Clarke down the drink. “We should socialize for a bit, come on.” With that Clarke walked out of the room.

Lexa looked at Raven who was confused. “What happened while I was gone?”

“I told her me and Costia broke up, and she just said I deserve a lot I don’t know. I said I didn’t want to lose our friendship. She was going to say something else but then you came in.”

Raven raised her eyebrow at that. “You don’t want to lose your friendship?” Lexa was confused as to why Raven was asking this. Lexa just nodded in response.

She just shook her head, “Friendship. Yeah sure, whatever you say Lexa. Lets go.”

Lexa followed out and closed her door behind her. Clarke had placed herself next to Octavia and Lincoln, Lexa wanted to be with her but she definitely didn’t want to be with them. She went and sat at the table taking care of pouring drinks for everyone who wanted, maybe it would save them a mess to clean up later. Being next to the drinks also made sure her own cup was always full.

Lexa was so focused that she didn’t notice Anya had moved to talk to her.

“Lexa!”

She popped her head up trying to figure out who wanted her attention. “Yeah?”

“Your girlfriend is drunk.” Lexa made a confused face, what was Anya talking about?

“What?” Anya just pointed to Clarke who was dancing herself around Niylah moving her body very seductively.

Lexa raised an eyebrow at Anya. “She’s not my girlfriend Anya.”

Lexa went back to pouring drinks but she kept an eye on Clarke. She was drunk, and being very touchy. It seriously was getting on her nerves, Lexa wanted nothing more than to grab Clarke and go with her to her room. Lexa stopped pouring when she saw Clarke pull Niylah towards the door to leave the apartment. Where the hell was she going? Lexa chugged the rest of her drink and stood up noting how dizzy that made her, shit she was drunk too.

She made her way towards the door, trying to walk as steady as possible but must have not been as steady as she thought because she felt someone steady her. She turned to see Raven grinning.

“Someone has had a lot to drink.” Lexa rolled her eyes but that just made her dizzy again so she grabbed Ravens arm to steady herself.

“Shut it Rey.” She just laughed at her.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Lexa turned to the door remembering Clarke and began walking towards it again. “Clarke left with Niylah, have to get her back.”

Raven just tugged Lexa back a little from the door which she was only able to do because of her state of intoxication. “And why do you need to get her back?”

Lexas mind was too fuzzy to think of an actual reason so she pulled her arm away from Raven and opened the door muttering, “My Clarke.”

She heard Ravens laugh following her before she turned and covered her mouth with her hand because she heard voices. Clarkes voice.

“Come on babe, don’t stop.”

“Clarke you’re drunk, a lot drunker than last time, and last time you stopped us remember?”

“I won’t stop us now, please.”

Lexa waited but didn’t hear anything else. Which she knew meant the girls were doing something. She jumped into movement when she heard a moan. Hell no. She somehow managed to jog towards the stairs she heard the voices coming from .

She felt her stomach drop and her heart burn at the sight of them. She saw Clarke being pressed against a wall, Niylah moving from kissing her lips to kissing down her neck. Clarkes eyes were closed, so she didn’t see her. She had her arms wrapped around Niylahs waist pulling her in even closer. Niylah had a leg between Clarkes which seemed to be what was causing Clarkes moaning as she was visibly grinding into it. Lexa felt vomit rise to her throat, but she swallowed it down. She felt Raven trying to pull her away but she couldn’t move. It hurt. She felt tears forming in her eyes but she couldn’t look away. Why did this hurt so much?

Lexa closed her eyes willing for this to all be in her mind, but then she heard another moan from Clarke and she ran. She was going to be sick. She heard voices calling after her as she ran, Ravens voice, Clarkes voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lexa is feeling something more than a physical attraction don't you think?! Sorry not sorry for the cliffhanger ;)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Panic Attack in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning hurts but the end is worth it :D

Lexa ran to the bathroom and slammed the door shut behind herself. She felt herself collapse onto her knees as she let out everything that had been in her stomach. She just kept hearing Clarkes moans over and over again in head. Why did this hurt? She heard voices on the other side of the door once she had nothing left to give.

“Go away Clarke, you have done enough.”

“What?! No! I didn’t do anything. What is wrong with her, did she drink too much?”

“Lexa hasn’t thrown up from drinking since we were sixteen. Just go back to Niylah Clarke.

“No Raven stop it.”

Lexa couldn’t breathe, she was trying but she couldn’t. She was hyperventilating. She was having a panic attack. She felt like she was going to pass out if she didn’t get some air soon. Her body was shaking uncontrollably.  She moved closer to the door unlocking it. It opened automatically almost slamming into her on the floor, she looked up to see Ravens face of shock.

“Shit!” She turned to Clarke, “Go get Lincoln!”

Raven stepped into the bathroom closing the door behind her before Clarke would have a chance to get in. She sat behind Lexa and wrapped her arms around her from behind. “Listen to me Lexa, breathe, you have to breathe.”

The door opened and Lexa looked up to see Lincolns worried face, before he slammed the door closed behind himself and locked it.

He sat in front of Lexa grabbing her hands. “Look at me, focus on my face we are going to count okay?”

Lexa nodded and felt Ravens head nod on her back.

“Count in your head until you can out loud.” Lexa nodded again still trying to pull in air.

“1……2……..3………4” Lexa closed her eyes listening to the sounds of Raven and Lincolns voices combined. Her body began to stop shaking, she was able to relax into Ravens hold, and able to grip Lincolns fingers.

She opened her eyes and began to count along with them. “72……73…..74……75.” She took in a deep breath of air. “I think I’m okay.” Raven released her hold on Lexas waist but didn’t move away from her completely.

Lincoln studied her face before pulling her in by the shoulder to hug her as hard as he could. “What the hell Lex, you haven’t had a panic attack since the beginning of high school?” She just shrugged.

“I think the alcohol got to me.” Lincoln just pulled away and looked at her, she knew he could tell she was lying.

“You only get them when you freak out, when something hurts you too much Lex. You began getting them after your mom, don’t lie to me. You only get them when you are overwhelmed to the point of you not being able to handle it. Don’t lie to me, I’m your brother.”

Lexa just shrugged and looked way.

“It was Clarke.” Lexa pulled away from Raven and glared at her for opening her damn mouth.

Lexa turned to see Lincoln glaring at her. “Clarke? Lexa you told me she was just a friend. You have Costia, you’re not like this I don’t understand.”

“Shut it Lincoln, her and Costia broke up, and no not because of Clarke, let Lexa feel what the fuck she feels and stop judging her for it.”

Lincolns eyes widened, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Lexa just began getting up, she ignored both of them while she brushed her teeth and washed her face. She turned to see them both watching her, “ I want to go to bed now.”

They nodded their heads and followed her to her room, where they found a passed out Clarke on her bed. Lexa felt the ache in her chest return.

“I will grab Octavia and we will get her out of here.”Lexa shook her head and made her way towards the bed.

“She can stay ,just tell Octavia she is here.” Lexa undid her shoes as Lincoln nodded and walked out.

“Lexa…..” She shook her head at Raven.

“I’m okay I promise. I will text you tomorrow okay?” Raven nodded and went to press a kiss onto Lexas forehead before making her way out and closing the door behind her.

Lexa sighed and looked at Clarke. She cared for her, more than a friend a lot more than a friend. Lexa realized just how fast she had gotten sober after her throwing up and panic attack. She had a panic attack because she saw Clarke with Niylah. She shook her head at herself, how could she let herself fall for this girl?

Lexa got up and put pajamas on, stopping to take Clarkes shoes off before she got into the bed herself.

Clarkes POV

Her eyes shot open when she heard running. She recognized Lexa. She pushed Niylah off of her taking the girl by surprise. Lexa?

She saw Raven trying to go after Lexa but her leg slowed her down. “Lexa!”

Clarke called out trying to get Lexas attention.

“Lexa!”

She caught up to Raven fast even though she was barely able to walk herself. “Where is she going?”

 Raven just turned and glared at her as they made their way into the apartment catching Clarke by surprise.

They heard the bathroom door slam shut and made their way over to it. They could hear Lexa throwing up, Clarke tried to open the door but it was locked.

“Go away Clarke, you have done enough.”

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

“What?! No! I didn’t do anything. What is wrong with her, did she drink too much?”

“Lexa hasn’t thrown up from drinking since we were sixteen. Just go back to Niylah Clarke.

“No Raven stop it.”

What the fuck did Niylah have to do with anything? Clarke was trying to keep calm.

Suddenly they heard the door unlock, and raven stepped forward pushing it open, Clarkes eyes widened at what she saw. Lexa was on the floor shaking, she obviously couldn’t breathe, she went to take a step forward but Raven stopped her.

“Shit!” She turned to her “Go get Lincoln!”

Raven walked into the bathroom and closed the door in her face.

Clarke ran to the living room and grabbed Lincolns arm pulling him up, “Lexas in the bathroom, I don’t think she can breathe.”

He ran before she could say anything else. She ran after her him but stopped when the door slammed closed and locked once again. What the fuck!?

She leaned her head against the door. They were counting. She couldn’t do anything so she decided to wait for Lexa in her room. Clarke laid down and began to count where she had heard them last up to.

“42…….43……44.”

Next thing she knew she felt her shoes being taken off, she opened her eyes to see Lexa crawling up the bed.

“Lexa?”

Lexa froze for a second before she laid down facing away from her.

“Go back to sleep Clarke.”

Clarke felt anger shoot through her but she tried to calm down, she reached her arm out and wrapped it around Lexas stomach but Lexa just took her arm and moved it away from her. Clarke felt her stomach drop at that.

“What happened to Niylah?”

Clarkes eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and then recognition, shit she just ran away from the girl without any explanation.

“I left her when I saw you.”

“Why?”

She thought about it a second. When she saw Lexa she felt worried but she also felt guilty. Why is it being with someone makes her feel guilty even though they aren’t together.

“I rather be with you.”

Lexa turned around to look at her. Clarke tried to touch her again but Lexa scooted herself back. “Why did you go back to Niylah tonight?” Clarke shrugged.

“I knew she wouldn’t deny me.”

Lexa just watched her. “No one would deny you Clarke, why her? Why another girl?”

Clarke was confused and though she didn’t feel as drunk as before the alcohol wasn’t helping because it sure sounded like Lexa was asking her why she chose Niylah instead of her.

“I think I like girls.” What she meant to say was, I think I like you but she couldn’t bring herself to say it.

Lexa just nodded and turned away from her again. Clarkes heart hurt, did she somehow hurt her?

She moved closer to Lexa and tried to run her hand up and down Lexas arm but she felt her stiffen, and move away. Clarke felt herself pout at Lexas rejection. Lexa turned her head to look at her and must have seen the hurt. “Please Lexa.” She just nodded and moved so she was slightly closer to Clarke.

Clarke took that as okay and wrapped her arm around Lexas waist and put her face between Lexas shoulder blades. “I’m sorry.” She didn’t really know what she was apologizing for but she felt like she should.

Lexas POV

She felt the sun on her face, she tried to pull the cover over her head but it wouldn’t budge. She opened her eyes to see Clarke grinning at her. Memories from the night before came rushing back to her. Sh groaned and rolled away from the other girl.

“Pretty sure we both missed our classes.” Lexa sat up quickly looking for her phone to see the time. It was fucking eleven thirty. She had indeed missed both of her classes. She turned and glared at Clarke.

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Clarke shrugged and sat up.

“Seemed like you could use the sleep after last night.”

Lexa closed her eyes remembering her panic attack. She opened them to see Clarke watching her.

“Why?” She knew Clarke was asking what caused it but she couldn’t answer that question right now. Instead she zeroed in on the new hickey Clarke was sporting.

Clarke must have noticed where she was looking because she got up and went to the mirror on Lexas desk and touched it. Lexa could see her frown at it through the mirror. “Just when the other one was starting to fade huh? Maybe she just likes to mark you so people will know you’re taken.” Lexa could hear her own bitterness in her voice.

Clarke turned around and made her way back to bed sitting in front of Lexa. “I’m not her….. Are you jealous Lexa?”

Lexa kept her face impassive, “You’re not mine to be jealous over.”

Clarke just nodded and made her way to sit next to her. But she must have changed her mind at the last minute making Lexa raise her eyebrow in question. Clarke climbed behind her putting one leg on either side of her and wrapping her arms around Lexas waist pulling her in closer.

Lexa relaxed automatically, she tried to keep calm as she felt Clarkes warm breath on her neck. “What do you want to do today?” She felt Clarke shrug and she began absentmindedly running her hands up and down the blondes legs. Lexa isn’t sure how long they sat there like that but she groaned when a phone began to ring. She crawled forward a bit making Clarke let go so she could grab Clarkes phone.

When she made her way back Clarke pulled her back into the position they had just been in. “Just read me what it says and who it is from.” Lexa bit her lip to not let out a noise from what Clarke talking into her neck was doing to her. She nodded and slid her finger along the screen opening the text message.

She began reading the message out loud, “Why didn’t you go to class. Where are you? You’re with her aren’t you?” She didn’t think it was possible but Clarke pulled her in closer. But the text reminded that Clarke was messing around with Niylah. She pulled away and turned to face Clarke putting her legs over the other girls.

“How does he know about you and Niylah? Did he see you guys together Friday night?”

Clarke just looked confused. “Why would he know about Niylah?”

Lexa waved Clarkes phone around, “He thinks you’re with her.”

Clarkes eyes widened and she shook her head. “He isn’t talking about her, he’s talking about you Lex.”

Lexas eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Why would he be asking if they were together? “Why would he be talking about me? I never met or spoke with him.”

Clarke blushed, “I used to talk about you before we broke up, and he saw you a couple of times when he picked me up from class.”

“That still doesn’t explain why he would be mad about you being with me. It makes more sense if it’s about Niylah, she’s the one you’re messing around with. Wait maybe he thinks you being into girls and me being a lesbian is connected. Does he know I’m gay?”

Clarke nodded, “Maybe he thinks we are more than friends?”

Lexa nodded but she was too focused on Clarkes eyes. “Why did you choose Niylah to try and figure things out with? Was she you first kiss with a girl?”

Clarke nodded again, “She was yeah, I never thought much about girls that way until recently.” Lexa felt the jealousy rise at knowing Niylah had the privilege of being Clarkes first kiss with a woman. She wishes it had been her.

“Why Niylah?”

Clarke shrugged, “I knew she wouldn’t say no.”

Lexa kept her eye contact with Clarke, “No one in their right mind would say no to you.” She saw Clarke blush and look away. She knew they had this conversation last night but she wanted to have it while they were both sober and see if anything changed.

“I didn’t want it to be with someone I actually cared for, what if I was wrong and I didn’t physically like girls like I thought I did? I can’t hurt someone I care about on purpose.”

Lexa nodded, she understood that even though she hated it, Clarke was looking at her again. Lexa tried to keep her eyes focused on the blue eyes, it took all of her self control not to glance down at her lips. Lexa took a big gulp. She saw Clarkes eyes look down at her lips and she licked them automatically.

“So you don’t actually want to be with Niylah?” Clarke shook her head no. Lexa felt herself relax some more. “Do you like girls?” Clarke shrugged.

“I’m physically attracted yes, but I only like one girl.” Lexa wondered and hoped that Clarke was talking about her, but she wouldn’t ask, she couldn’t. She nodded.

“I didn’t like seeing you with her.”

She turned away from Clarke before she could say anything and went back to her previous position, pulling Clarkes arms around her middle before Clarke could do it herself. “So he has been following you around?”

She felt Clarke shrug and shiver, “I guess so but I hate thinking about it, it’s creepy as hell.”

Lexa nodded keeping quiet. “Are you going to tell me what happened to you last night?”

Lexa closed her eyes and shook her head no. How was she supposed to explain to her that the combination of alcohol and seeing her with a girl like that had caused her to freak out and have a damn panic attack? That Lexa cared for her more than she should, that she hoped Clarke felt the same way. Clarke was trying to figure her damn sexuality out she wouldn’t add to that burden.

She tried to get up and go to the bathroom but Clarke wouldn’t release her hold. “ClarKe.”

She felt the blonde shake her head no. “I want to take a shower.” She felt the girls head shake no again. “Come with me then.”

 Clarkes head popped up so fast. “Shower with you?” Lexa laughed at the squeak in her voice. She laughed and pushed Clarke away.

“No you pervert, you can like sit on the toilet while I shower and talk to me. Unless you really want to” She got up and saw that Clarke had turned a bright crimson, she looked adorable, Lexa grabbed her clothes and bent down to press a kiss to Clarkes cheek and winked at her. Why not tease her a little with her new found interest in girls? “Give me two minutes before you come in.” Clarke just nodded in response.

Lexa walked to the bathroom quickly undressing and getting in before Clarke could come in. She stood under the water making it hotter and hotter until she felt it burning a little. She loved hot showers. She heard the door open and smiled to herself.

“Christ Lexa, how can you breathe with all the steam?”

“I don’t know it doesn’t bother me while I’m actually in the shower.”

“Well maybe I will actually have to join you.”

Lexas eyes widened she wouldn’t dare, would she?

“You wouldn’t dare Griffin.”

“Want to bet?” Lexa just shook her head in response.

“You don’t have the guts.”

 She began washing up when all of a sudden she heard the shower curtain being pulled open. She turned her head but before she could see anything Clarkes hands covered her eyes. “Stay facing that way Lex. Okay?”

Lexas heart was beating fast again. She was naked in the shower and considering Clarke had gotten in too she assumed the other girl was naked as well. She turned her head back towards the stream of water and Clarke removed her hand. Lexa still wasn’t moving though. She was clutching the soap at her side with all of her life.

“You were right it is easier to breathe in here.” Lexa couldn’t believe she said that because now she couldn’t breathe at all and the way Clarke spoke made her sound like she was panting. “Pass me your shampoo.”

Lexa listened and grabbed it holding it over her shoulder so she wouldn’t have to turn around and see the girl behind her.

She jumped when she felt Clarkes hands in her hair, and then the girls voice so very close to her ear. “I’m just going to wash your hair and get out okay?” Lexa nodded and closed her eyes.

Clarke began rubbing the shampoo into her scalp, but she kept a good distance so she wasn’t touching her anywhere else. Lexa blushed when she realized Clarkes view was of her ass. It took all her will not to lean back into the blonde, so she could feel what her body felt like.

She was also trying not to moan at how good it felt to feel Clarkes hands running through her hair. “Rinse.” Lexa nodded and stepped forward more into the water to get all of the suds out of her hair. She stepped back but felt Clarkes hand on her back to stop her from moving anymore. She froze but then she saw the shampoo in the corner of her eyes and put it back in its place, automatically grabbing the conditioner and passing it back.

She relaxed again when she felt Clarke working that into her hair now too. What did this mean, what was this to Clarke?

“Are we friends?”

“Yes. Step into the water.” Lexa listened and Clarke began to run her fingers through her hair untangling the knots while taking out the conditioner.

“I don’t shower with my friends Clarke.” Clarke finished what she was doing pulling Lexa back a step, out of the water. Handing Lexa the conditioner to put back.

“Neither do I Lexa.” Before she could say anything she felt Clarkes lips on her shoulder, then a sudden bite made her yelp. She felt Clarke grin and then a tongue soothed the bite mark. Lexa couldn’t help but moan out loud. She felt her entire body shiver from that one touch and knew that Clarke could probably tell.

“Claaarke.” She didn’t mean for the girls name to come out sounding like a moan but it did and she bit her lip to stop. She felt Clarke lightly kiss her shoulder, and heard the curtain opening again.

“Meet you in the room Lex.”

Lexa let out a breath when she heard the bathroom door close, she leaned her head on the shower wall. She needed to shower again, not all of what was running down her thighs was water anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys things are gonna start moving really fast, hope you take this ride with me ;)  
> Let me know what you think!


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things happen., have to read to find out what ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be honest I'm not too confident with this but I gave it my best shot. I hope you enjoy :(

Clarkes POV  
Clarke leaned against the bathroom door trying to catch her breathe. She really just climbed in the shower after Lexa. She opened her eyes to see Anya sitting at the kitchen table grinning at her. Clarke felt herself flush, she turned and stepped into Lexas room closing the door behind herself.  
She face palmed when she realized she left her clothes in the bathroom, she was just standing there in her towel. She turned towards the door to go get them she couldn’t go back in there without going back to Lexa. Shit.  
She made sure she was dried off before sitting on the bed with the towel still wrapped around herself. She heard the shower turn off and her heart began beating a million times a minute. She turned so her back was facing the door. She heard the bedroom door open but closed her eyes and didn’t turn.   
She felt the bed shift next to her and then felt Lexas hands on her face. “Clarke look at me.” She took a deep breath in and opened her eyes to see Lexa searching her face for something. Clarke doesn’t know what she found but suddenly Lexa stood up and started going through her drawers pulling out clothing and handing them to Clarke. “You can wear these.”  
Clarke got up to go get dressed in the bathroom when Lexa grabbed her arm. When she went to turn and look at her Lexa held her in place. “Play fair Griffin.” With that Lexa tugged lightly on the towel, telling Clarke what she wanted.   
Clarke breathed in deeply, “Lexa I..” She felt Lexas arms drop from holding her.  
“I’m just teasing you don’t have to do anything.” Clarke nodded but she didn’t move. She took a deep breathe in and dropped her towel. She heard Lexa gasp which brought a smile to her lips. Her nerves left her again and she felt confident. She felt behind herself until she had Lexas arm and pulled her closer, placing the hand on her shoulder. Clarke then moved her hair to one side making sure to cover the side that held the marks from last night, before covering her breasts with her arms.   
Lexa got the cue because next thing Clarke felt was Lexas lips on her neck, she sighed in relief as Lexa bit and soothed her bite marks with licks and kisses. She ran her hands up and down Clarkes back causing her to shiver each time.   
Clarke whined when Lexa stopped her actions on her neck but moaned when she felt that they were just moving to her back. She could feel herself growing wetter and wetter with every touch Lexa gave to her. She heard herself moan embarrassingly loud and tensed with embarrassment.   
Lexa dropped her hands and moved back a step. Clarke could hear Lexa was breathing harder just like her. “You should get dressed.” Clarke nodded and put the tshirt over her head before putting on the shorts Lexa had given her. She took a deep breathe before turning around to see Lexa sitting on the bed rubbing her head.  
She moved closer to her and gripped Lexas chin making her look at her. “You okay?” Lexa nodded.  
“Clarke, I don’t think I can do this.” Her heart dropped she felt tears spring to her eyes and her heart she swore to anything just cracked a bit. She stood up automatically looking around for her actual clothes. All she heard was a buzzing in her head, she needed to get out of there.  
She walked to the living room looking to see if her jacket was there. She noted Anya still sitting at the table with a confused face but she kept searching.   
“Clarke, what are you doing?” Come back to the room. Clarke. Clarke!!” She felt Lexa grab her arm and pull her towards the room, she saw Anya rushing past them on her way to her room too.  
She actually really was trying to pull away from Lexa, but the girl was freakishly strong. Lexa got her into the room and locked the door behind them when she saw Clarke wasn’t going to give up and was already going for the door. “Will you stop being so damn stupid and listen to me?”   
Her heart was still beating ridiculously fast, and Lexa was pushing her to sit on the bed but she wasn’t going to make this easy. She couldn’t fall apart in front of her, she refused to. She felt her knees hit the edge of the bed making her fall back, before she could get up though Lexa was on top of her, straddling her. Clarke pushed at Lexas chest trying to get her off, but she just grabbed both of her wrists in one hand and pinned them above her head.  
She stopped moving knowing she had lost the flight. “Please just listen to me Clarke, it’s not what you think, can I let go without you running off?” Clarke glared at her but nodded.  
Lexa got off of her and she sat up pulling her knees in to her chest, “Just get on with it Lexa so I can leave.”  
“I know you’re smart so stop being dense.” She sat facing her with one leg on either side of her. Clarke refused to look at her, she felt a tear sliding down her face. Lexa grabbed her face and wiped the tear making her look at her face.  
“I want you. Like I want you as more than a friend Clarke, I can’t just be you’re friend.”   
Clarkes eyes widened, she thought she had pushed her too far with everything and that Lexa was shutting her down not only sexually but as a friend to. “You do?”  
Lexa smiled at her and pulled her in by her chin, Clarke could feel Lexas breathe on her lips. “Can I kiss you?” Clarke didn’t answer, she tackled Lexa back and climbed on top of her straddling her. Lexa laughed at her. Clarke just smiled placing one hand on either side of Lexas head. She felt Lexa grab her by the hips. Clarke stared at Lexas lips licking and biting her own. She was nervous all of sudden.  
“Are you going to just stare or are you going to make.” Clarke didn’t let her finish, she bent her head and captured Lexas lips with her own. And oh god she never felt anything softer in her life. They moved their lips against each other for a little but then Lexa licked Clarkes bottom lip and Clarke needed more, she captured Lexas tongue and moaned. No one had ever tasted so good before, Lexa was minty and sweet at the same time. They battled for dominance, Clarke felt this kiss in her entire body, she never wanted it to end.   
Lexa moved back for a moment and Clarke tried to chase her not wanting to separate which earned her a giggle from Lexa. She pulled back and gasped for air not knowing how long it had been since she breathed.  
She looked down to see Lexa smiling at her. “I’m guessing that means you feel the same?”  
Clarke bent her head and began kissing along Lexas jaw and her neck, she moved towards Lexas ear and whispered “Yes.” She felt Lexa shiver beneath her. She sat up, looking at the beautiful girl beneath her. “I want you Lexa.” She saw the green eyes darken.   
“Clarke?”  
She ignored her and began kissing her once again, she could kiss her forever and never stop. She had wanted this what felt like so long. She knew now she would have never been satisfied kissing anyone else, guy or girl, no, she never felt this in a kiss before. She pulled away to catch her breath. “Lexa I want you.” She ground down on to Lexa moaning.   
But Lexa grabbed her waist stopping her movements. She smiled at how Lexa was breathing hard obviously trying to catch her breathe. Her eyebrows were furrowed in concentration. She was so fucking sexy.  
“Clarke, we don’t have to. You have never done this before. There’s no need to rush.”   
Clarke stopped and thought for a moment, it didn’t feel rushed to her, she wanted Lexa, had wanted her since she met her, it wasn’t even a want anymore, it was a need. She ground down on Lexa again enjoying the pressure she felt but needing more.  
“I need you.” She pressed down again leaning her head down onto Lexas neck panting at her own movements. “Please.” She felt Lexa nod, she lifted her head and smiled down.  
Clarke shifted so that she had one leg in between Lexas. She felt Lexa thrust up onto her leg and smiled at her. She bent down and kissed Lexas neck enjoying the reaction she got for it, she could feel the heat from Lexa on her leg. She herself was pretty sure she would be dripping down her leg at any moment. She moved to Lexas ear, “Take me Commander.”  
Lexas POV  
“Take me Commander”  
Those words sent another shiver through her body, but Lexa didn’t hesitate, she flipped Clarke over so that she was now on top and had a leg pressed between Clarkes. She ground her leg where she knew Clarke needed it most. Hearing Clarke beg was the sexiest thing in the world, she couldn’t say no if she wanted to and she definitely didn’t. She pressed a little harder.  
She got exactly what she wanted, Clarke began moaning into her ear. Lexa needed more she captured Clarkes lips into another deep kiss swallowing the girls moans as if they were what was keeping her alive. She could feel that Clarke was close with the way she began to tense under her.  
She wanted to feel her come though, she would give anything. “Tell me to stop if you need me too.”   
Lexa removed her leg from between Clarkes and kissed the pout on her lips away at the loss of friction.   
“Lexa please.” Clarke grabbed her hips trying to move back into her previous position. Lexa grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head.   
“Patience or you will get nothing. Do you understand?” She looked down to see that Clarkes eyes showed almost no blue anymore, she was biting her lip so hard Lexa was surprised she hadn’t broken skin. She waited for a response, Clarke nodded her head. She knew Clarke would want to be dominated.  
Lexa pushed Clarkes shirt slightly up revealing the girls hip bones, she traced her hand over the exposed skin while pressing kisses to Clarkes neck, She paused when she saw the mark Niylah had previously left and frowned. She didn’t want to think of anyone else feeling Clarke this way. She shook her head suddenly pushing her hand into the shorts Clarke was wearing.  
She heard the blonde gasp making her smile, she could feel her trembling beneath her and she hadn’t even touched her yet. Lexa began rubbing Clarkes upper thighs moving slowly higher and higher. Clarkes upper thighs were slick with want making Lexa groan. She could tell Clarke was doing her best to be patient and decided to reward her for it.  
“Take it off.” She released Clarkes hands and it would have been comical how fast Clarke threw the T-shirt over her head along with the shorts down her legs. Lexa would have laughed if she wasn’t busy taking in the body before her. It was perfect, ever curve and dip, every freckle.  
Lexa placed both her legs between Clarkes as she began to kiss her slowly grinding down into her. She pulled away from the kiss even though Clarkes lips tried to stop her. If she kept going she was going to make herself cum. Every time she ground into the blonde a shock was sent through her entire body. She began making her way down kissing Clarkes neck and collar bones. She stopped and pulled back to take in the view of Clarkes breast. She reached a hand out and began to tweak one of her nipples while capturing the other in her mouth.  
Clarkes moans increased tenfold. She felt it make her throb between her legs. Lexa began to roll it with her tongue, switching between sucking and nibbling. Clarke began to full out thrust into her but she let her knowing she needed it. She could have spent forever on Clarkes breasts but she knew she was needed elsewhere. She rose back up placing her lips onto Clarkes shoulder and began to kiss it while she moved her right hand down between Clarkes legs.   
She ran her fingers through Clarkes folds, her mouthwatering with how wet the girl was. She turned her head towards Clarkes ear, “Shit Clarke you’re so fucking wet.”  
She didn’t think Clarke could hear her over the noises she was making. Lexa found Clarkes clit and began rubbing circles around it and Clarke slapped her hand down over her own mouth trying to cover the noises she was making. Lexa sat up not stopping her movements but laying her body next to Clarkes instead of on top of her. She grabbed the blondes hand that was covering her mouth and placed it above her head. “I want to hear everything.” Clarke nodded in consent.  
Lexa moved her fingers down, away from Clarkes clit making the girl whimper in displeasure. Lexa smiled to herself, she loved how impatient Clarke was, it would be fun to tease her. She began circling Clarkes entrance not actually going in. Clarke tried to thrust her hips up to force Lexa inside of her, Lexa shook her head and placed an arm over Clarkes waist to hold her in place. She let one finger continue to circle her entrance and her thumb to graze over her clit.   
She knew she was driving her crazy from all the moaning, “Lexa I can’t please.” That’s what she had been waiting for, she thrust a finger into Clarke and began thrusting slowly trying to find the spot that would push Clarke over the edge. She knew she found it when Clarke gasped and began panting into her ear.   
“Oh fuck Lex, please don’t stop.”   
Lexa went to put another finger in but she had to do it slowly so as not to hurt the other girl. “You’re so tight Clarke.” Clarke answered with a whimper. Once she knew Clarke was comfortable she began thrusting harder and faster, she wanted to give Clarke the best Orgasm of her life. She knew she was close, she was thrusting into her hand harder and faster than before. Lexa felt Clarke bite into her shoulder and she found the strength to move even faster enjoying the sounds of her fingers slamming into Clarkes wetness.  
“Shit baby I’m going to cum” She kissed Clarkes temple.   
“Then cum for me.”  
She felt Clarke clamping down on her fingers and she began to shake, Lexa didn’t slow down, even as she felt Clarke begin to relax. She pulled out of her grasp and dove down taking Clarkes clit into her mouth and began flicking her tongue across it not slowing her fingers down.  
“What are you doing? Oh god, oh god. Shit Lexa again.”  
She felt Clarkes walls clamp down on her finger harder before they had even stopped from the first orgasm. Clarke grabbed her head and began grinding into her face riding it out. Lexa released her clit and began slowing down her movements letting Clarke feel this one out. She began kissing up her body, but hadn’t removed her fingers just yet.   
When Lexa made it back to Clarkes face she kissed her lips lightly a couple of times while Clarke tried to catch her breath, she smiled and removed her fingers. She turned her head to make sure Clare was watching her and stuck her fingers that had just been inside of Clarke into her mouth.  
She closed her eyes trying to enjoy the flavor that was Clarke. Her eyes popped open, it was really good. Lexa sucked her fingers clean but she wanted more. She looked at Clarke who was watching her with her mouth open. She went to kiss her letting her taste herself.  
“You taste good, don’t you think?”  
“Fucking christ Lexa you're better in bed than I ever imagined.”  
Lexa smirked, “How long have you been thinking about me fucking you?”  
Clarke blushed, “Basically since I met you?”   
Her eyes widened, “We fought that whole first week.”  
“What can I say? I find you being angry very sexy.” Lexa rolled her eyes and pushed at Clarkes shoulder.  
“You’re annoying.”   
Clarke sat up and began running her hands under her shirt Lexa grabbed her hands stopping her from moving any higher, “Clarke you don’t have to.”   
Clarke released her hands from her grasp. “Lexa I want to, I want you, I want to make you feel what you made me feel.” Clarke looked away for a moment biting her lip. Lexa turned her face back so she was looking at her.  
“Talk.”  
“I have never done this, and you are obviously amazing at it, I don’t… What if I’m not any good?”  
“Don’t do anything you aren’t ready for, this is new to you I get that. Don’t worry. Ok?” Clarke nodded and removed Lexas hands right before she took off her shirt.   
Lexa stilled watching as Clarke took her in, she felt another throb at seeing Clarke lick her lips.   
“I want to do everything, just if I do something wrong tell me how to fix it.” Lexa nodded.  
Clarke kissed her on the lips quickly sucking her bottom lip as she pulled away.  
She began kissing down her body, every kiss sent a shiver straight to her center. Clarke stopped her kissing when she reached Lexas breasts, she cupped one and squeezed lightly rolling her nipple between her fingers. Lexa knew Clarke was looking for a reaction so she nodded her head at her as she bit her own lip.  
Clarke smiled shyly and bent her head to take the nipple into her mouth, Lexa let out a moan a she felt Clarke suck lightly on her. She pushed her chest out more and Clarke got the clue and began sucking harder making Lexa squirm. She felt Clarke smile around her.   
Lexa was throbbing and so damn wet, she needed more but she wouldn’t ask for it, she wanted Clarke to do what made her comfortable. Clarke chose that moment to climb on top of her and place her thigh between Lexas legs and press down. Lexa let out a groan that was literally impossible to hold in. “Fuck Clarke” Her eyes rolled to the back of her head when Clarke began grinding down into her. Lexa felt how wet Clarke still was by the moisture on her leg and it only turned her on more.  
Lexa couldn’t stop herself from grabbing Clarke by the ass and pushing and pulling her in harder, she was close to reaching an orgasm it was driving her crazy, she began panting, pulling Clarke down to kiss her while trying not to stop their movements. She just about lost her mind when Clarke stopped.  
She opened her eyes ready to complain when she felt her underwear and shorts being tugged down, she knew she should ask Clarke if she was sure damn it she needed something more and if Clarke was willing to give it who was she to question it. When a beautiful girl wants you, you don’t say no.  
Clarke crawled between her legs and spread them a bit, she was just looking which was driving her mad.   
“What are you doing?”   
Clarke looked up and blushed, “I wanted to see what you looked like, I have never seen any but my own, I was curious.” Lexa nodded understanding, she felt how wet she was now with the air hitting her, she even felt it on her thighs. She tried to close her legs to get some kind of pressure but Clarke held them open.  
She closed her eyes again trying to calm herself but the ache wouldn’t go away. She was five seconds away from touching herself. Her eyes snapped open when she felt fingers touching her, she moaned and tried to push down towards them for more. But Clarke had pulled her hand away and was examining her fingers, she looked up and smirked at her. “You’re dripping onto the bed Lexa.”  
Lexa rolled her eyes, how was Clarke still able to be annoying in this situation? “I am horny Clarke.”  
“What do you want me to do?”  
She could see how nervous the girl was. “What do you want to do?”  
Clarke closed her eyes and Lexa could see the blush rising to her cheeks. She waited for her to look at her again before raising an eyebrow. “I want to taste you.” Lexa couldn’t help it her eyes bulged and she moaned throwing her head back on the bed. She couldn’t wait anymore. She lowered her hand and began rubbing circles around her clit. “Fuck Clarke.”   
“No baby, I want to, please.” She felt Clarke moving her hand away and sighed. But it turned into a gasp when Clarke began repeating the movement she had just stopped. Lexa began gasping for air, if Clarke kept this up she was going to cum. She couldn’t understand why this felt better than any other time she had sex. Clarke made her feel everything like it was new.  
Lexa threw an arm over her eyes trying to hold off her orgasm, she was enjoying this too much to have it end so soon. She felt Clarke moving around but made no effort to move, but then she felt something warm at her entrance and Clarkes hair on her thighs. She threw her arms to the side and began shaking uncontrollably at the sight before her. Clarke was fucking her with her tongue.  
Clarkes POV  
She had never done this before, she was nervous, she wanted to please Lexa, she wanted to make her feel as good as she had made her feel. “I want to taste you.”  
“Fuck Clarke.”   
Before Clarke could do anything Lexa began touching herself, and while it was the sexiest thing she had ever seen, she wanted to make Lexa cum her herself.   
“No baby, I want to, please.” Clarke moved Lexas hand away and started to copy the movements she had seen her doing. Lexa began gasping for air, Clarke smirked to herself, she wanted Lexa to make more noises and she thought she knew how.   
She began adjusting her body so that she would be able to have a better angle. She looked up before she delved in and smiled seeing that Lexa looked like she was trying to hold herself together. She stuck out her tongue and dipped it into Lexas entrance. She paused for a moment trying to enjoy the taste that was Lexa for the first time. She wasted no time diving back in to get more, she knew in that instant she would never tire of this, of tasting her.   
When Lexa began shaking uncontrollably she smiled, she began thrusting her tongue in as far as she could, one of those times Lexa gasped and moaned so loud Clarkes eyes rolled back in pleasure. She tried to replicate what she had done and she knew automatically when she did because Lexa began thrusting herself onto her tongue.  
“Oh, God don’t stop!”  
Clarke thought about holding her down but she enjoyed having her face be fucked like this. She took her tongue out and heard Lexa whimper at the loss. But Clarke just wanted to suck on and nibble on her clit so she did. She replaced her tongue with two fingers and wasted no time finding the spot she had been hitting earlier. Except now she was able to hit it harder and faster. She was trying to repeat what it felt like Lexa had done to her.  
She popped her mouth off for a moment to catch her breathe. “Is this good Lex? Am I doing it right?”   
Lexa raised her head to look at her, breathing fast, sweat visible on her forehead. She was still moaning but managed to nod her head in approval.  
“I’m… going to cum… just keep going please.” Clarke nodded, Lexa grabbed her head and moved it back to her clit where she wanted it. Clarke got back to work doing what she had done before but with a fervor, knowing Lexa was close to coming undone. She wanted to know what that looked like more than anything in this world. After a few more deep thrusts of her fingers she found out.  
She began to feel Lexa tightening on her finger, she lifted her eyes not stopping her movements and saw the most beautiful sight before her. Lexa was arching her back off of the bed. Her hand in her mouth, she was biting her own fingers to quiet herself down. Clarke couldn’t help but moan at the site, she wanted to see this every day, to do this every day. Lexa laid back once her orgasm was done, shaking off the hand she had bitten into. Clarke took her fingers out and made her way back up to Lexa. She sucked one of her fingers into her mouth enjoying the taste.  
Lexa was watching her, she smiled at the girl next to her as she sucked that finger clean. Clarke went to put the other finger in her mouth but Lexa stopped her and brought it to her own mouth. Clarkes eyes widened, Lexa sucked her finger dry moaning as she did so and released it with a pop. Holy shit this girl was the sexiest thing she had ever seen, smelled, tasted or heard.  
She laid back and covered her eyes trying to calm herself down. She was breathing deeply trying to wrap her head around everything that had just happened. It was better than she could have ever imagined. She felt a poke on her shoulder, she uncovered her eyes and turned to see Lexa watching her with a worried face.  
“Are you okay?”  
Clarke smiled and turned her body so she was facing her completely, she studied Lexas face, she used her hand to trace her jaw. “I’m definitely more than okay.”  
Lexa was still studying her but nodded.   
“So more than friends Lex?” Lexa was still watching her.  
Lexa began tracing patterns onto her stomach making her shiver, she looked up and smiled softly at Clarkes reaction.   
“Yeah definitely more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have never tried to write a sex scene in my life, and I don't know, I tried. I'm sorry if it was horrible, but I really do hope you liked it. I have been loving all of your comments they have been amazing guys. You make me keep going so keep it up and let me know what you thought of this. Please don't rip me apart too bad if you hated it.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Goodye, Spring Break, I miss you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Sorry this update took so long!! I'm a senior in college and finals week has officially begun! I only have one test left though so I should be back to updating regularly!

Clarke was walking to her class the next morning with her head phones in bobbing to the song that was playing.

_Can’t keep my hands to myself_

_No matter how hard I’m trying to_

She had woken up so excited to see Lexa. She felt her cheeks flush from thinking about her. They had spent the early afternoon together just lying in bed and watching television until Lexa had to leave to go meet with a group for another class. Clarke had gone back to her room and had tried to focus on studying for a physics test but she only had Lexa on the brain.

They hadn’t talked since they had separated. She was a little nervous about how they would act towards each other out in public. What did being more than friends actually mean?

Clarke walked into the room eyes automatically finding Lexa. She had her hair loose with some braids in it, She smiled she loved when Lexa wore her hair that way. Her nerves hit her full force, she wanted to turn and run. What if Lexa didn’t want her? Her heart began pounding in her chest and she felt like she was going to be sick. The door opened behind her bumping into her. She took off a headphone to apologize the person. When she turned back Lexa was watching her, she had a confused face. But when she saw Clarke saw she gave a little smile and gestured for Clarke to come sit.

Clarke returned the smile feeling relief flood through her. She began walking towards Lexa who didn’t stop watching her. It made her nervous again. She sat and put her bag down, turning to Lexa to say hello.

“Hey Lex.”

“ClarKe.” Clarkes eyes widened at the red that rose Lexas cheeks and ears when she said her name. She wanted to comment and tease her but Mr. Kane chose that time  to start class.

Clarke tried her best to concentrate but having Lexa so close and not touching her was driving her crazy. She tried not to stare at her, she really did but it felt impossible. She knew Lexa felt her staring because she was smirking.

Class had twenty minutes left when Lexa must have been tired of her staring because Clarke was shocked out of it when Lexa shoved her shoulder and pointed towards Mr.Kane. She felt herself blush. She had to concentrate on something else. She opened her notebook and began doodling, it only took her like five minutes.

It came out kind of just looking like a gear, she thought it was trash, she ripped it out of her book and went to crumple it but knew Lexa would still want to see it. She placed it on Lexas desk. Lexa looked down at it and traced each line with her fingers, she picked it up and placed in a folder.

She glanced at Clarke, reached out and squeezed her hand. Just that touch had Clarkes heart hammering. When Lexa went to pull away Clarke squeezed her hand, Lexa studied her face for a moment and nodded focusing in back on what Mr. Kane was saying, but she didn’t move her hand from Clarkes grip.

Clarke felt relieved, she knew Lexa had let her done this before they had sex but it calmed her to know she wasn’t pulling away. She turned Lexas hand over and began tracing the lines of her palm. She must have lost track of time because next thing she knew people around them were packing up and Lexa was watching her.

She pulled her hand away from Clarkes gasp and began rubbing her own palm off.

“That tickled the entire time.”

Clarke looked down, “You could have told me to stop Lex.”

She looked up to see Lexa watching her and shrug. “I didn’t want you to.”

Clarke got up and began putting her stuff away. That response making her freeze and her heart skip a moment.

“Ms. Griffin may I speak to you real quick?”

Clarke looked up to see Mr. Kane looking at her.

“Yes ser.” She finished putting her stuff away and turned to Lexa.

“Ohhhh you’re in trouble Clarke.”

“Shut it. Wait for me?”

Lexa nodded putting her bag over her shoulder and making her way out of the classroom. Clarke took a deep breath and walked over to where the professor was waiting.

“Yes professor Kane?”

“Are you alright?”

Clarke was confused by his question. “Yes?”

“You seemed a bit distracted today.”

Clarke felt herself blush and look away, “Sorry, it won’t happen again.”

“Miss Alexandria should not be your focus.” Clarke thought she was going to die of embarrassment. She literally had no chill, even the damn professor could see how enamored she was with Lexa.

She just nodded her head, she wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. “Is that all sir?”

“Yes Ms. Griffin, see you after break.”

She nodded and walked towards the door, turning back to see that he was still watching her with a smirk on his face now. She shook her head and opened the door to see Lexa on her phone waiting for her.

She looked up when she approached putting her phone away.

“What did he want?”

Clarke looked down and shuffled her feet a bit. “I need to concentrate on class instead of concentrating on you.” She looked up to see Lexa smiling at her.

“Well he is right you know.” Clarke rolled her eyes.

“Shut up Lexa. When do you leave for break?

“A couple of hours, you?”

“My dad is picking me up tonight.”

Lexa nodded her head, “Have you packed?” Clarke shook her head.

“Me either.” She seemed to think a moment before speaking again. “Want to keep me company while I pack?”

Clarke couldn’t help her smile and nodding enthusiastically. Lexa laughed at her and shook her head. She held her hand out for Clarke to take, she didn’t hesitate one moment before taking it.

Lexas POV

She was going through her drawers throwing things into her suitcase trying to pack fast so she could just relax before heading home with Raven and Lincoln. She could feel Clarkes eyes on her. It made it hard for her to concentrate knowing she was being watched.

She couldn’t do it, she turned to face Clarke who didn’t even look away. “You’re staring Clarke.”

The girl just shrugged at her not stopping. Lexa picked up a pillow and threw it at her. “Stop Clarke.”

She turned back to packing but stiffened when she felt Clarke wrap her arms around her waist and tried to pull her onto the bed. She relaxed into the hold but didn’t let herself be pulled. She turned around so she was facing the blonde.

Clarke began releasing her hold on Lexa with a sad look on her face, she must have taken it as a rejection. Lexa frowned a moment before putting her hand on Clarkes neck rubbing her thumb over the girls jaw. She leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to the girls lips feeling the warmth it ignited in her. She pulled away before she or Clarke could try and deepen it.

“Give me a couple of minutes to finish packing and then we can do whatever you want, ok?” She felt a throb between her own legs at her words, hoping she knew what Clarke would want. Clarke nodded and quickly placed a kiss to Lexas lips before shuffling back on the bed.

“Can I get your notebook so I can copy today’s notes?” Lexa nodded and pointed to where her bag was on the floor.

It only took Lexa a couple more minutes of packing before she was done. She put her bag down by the door, she looked at the time. She would have to leave in the next hour to make it to the bus stop on time.

She turned to the bed and watched as Clarke focused on copying her notes. She had her tongue sticking out slightly. She looked cute. She made her way to the bed and placed herself behind Clarke wrapping her hands around her waist. She put her face into her hair and breathed in. She heard Clarke breathe in relief at her touch which made her smile.

“Almost done?”

Clarke nodded and continued writing, faster than she had before. Lexa waited patiently, playing with Clarkes hair as she did. She began braiding parts of her hair to match her own. When she was finished she realized Clarke had already finished and had just been waiting for her to finish. She let the blonde hair drop from her fingers. Clarke lightly touched her hair and turned so they were facing each other.

“Thank you.”

Lexa just nodded, thinking about what to do next. “I have to leave in less than an hour.”

Clarke nodded, and looked down. “I’m going to miss you over break.”

Lexa lifted her head so that Clarkes blue eyes met her own, “I will miss you too, but we can text. Ok?”

Clarke gave a light smile at her, but Lexa was still focused on her eyes. She couldn’t tear her eyes away, mentally she was chastising herself because she stared as much as Clarke did if she was being honest.

“What are you going to do while you are home?”

“Hang out with Lincoln and Raven still, spend some time with the parentals. Nothing special.”

Lexa watched as Clarke seemed to contemplate on saying something else. “Are you going to see Costia?”

The question took her by surprise, but she should have known Clarke would worry. After all they still spoke, more in the past week that they have been broken up than they did in the past month.

She took Clarkes hand in hers, she would always tell her the truth. “She has asked to hang out over break and I said yes.” She could feel Clarke pulling away from her. She moved closer so that she had her hands on Clarkes face and her legs on top of Clarkes almost wrapped around her waist.

Clarke wouldn’t look at her. “Hey, look at me.” She waited for Clarke to open her eyes before she began speaking again. “We are just friends I promise, I don’t want to lose her friendship Clarke.” Clarke nodded but didn’t look convinced.

“I won’t…. we won’t…” She took in a deep breathe trying to say what she felt. She looked down, she was never good at explain what she was feeling. “I don’t want her as anything other than a friend……. I don’t want her the way I want you. Okay?”

She felt Clarke lifting her face up, the blonde was smiling at her as she nodded. “Okay.”

Lexa smiled and leaned forward pressing a kiss to Clarkes lips, she went to pull back but Clarke placed a hand on the back of her neck pulling her deeper into the kiss and Lexa let her enjoying every moment of it. The longer and deeper they kissed the more she wanted though.

Lexa felt the heat between her legs, but all she could think about was touching and tasting the girl before her. She began pushing at Clarke’s shirt, until she got the cue to take it off, breaking their kiss. Lexa didn’t waste a moment, she had Clarkes bra off seconds after. She went straight for her nipples putting one in her mouth while rolling the other with her fingers. Her moans were driving her crazy, she needed something.

Lexa let go of the nipple in her mouth. “We need to be fast baby.” Clarke opened her eyes and nodded. Laying herself back and pulling her to lay on top of her.

Lexa gasped when she felt Clarke begin rubbing her through her pants. She went straight for the blondes pants button and pulled her pant and underwear down at once.

“Wait.” Lexa froze, stopping herself from touching her.

“I’m sorry, I thought you wanted it.”

Clarke smiled pressing a kiss to her lips.

“We have to be fast, I want us to cum together. You are entirely too dressed for that.” Lexa smiled relieved, she thought she had done something wrong. She nodded her head and allowed Clarke to undress her. Once they were both undressed Lexa pressed Clarkes shoulder for her to lay back down.

She wanted to feel her around her fingers, but Clarke beat her to it causing Lexa to moan at the sudden intrusion of Clarkes fingers inside of her.

She didn’t hesitate before entering Clarke with the same suddenness that Clarke had entered her. She felt so warm and wet. It amazed her how fast Clarke could get wet for her. She began thrusting her fingers in and out meeting Clarkes pace. They were both at the perfect angles both hitting each other’s clits with each thrust.

Lexa grabbed her face pulling her into a kiss where they mostly moaned into each other.   
The sounds of their moans combined, the feeling of Clarke around her fingers, and the feeling of Clarke hitting her spot had her so close to coming undone. Every thrust increased in pleasure, she began to feel it all over her entire body. She wanted Clarke to feel the same way, she focused all of her energy on hitting the spot she had learned would bring the other girl undone.

“Lexa right now.” Lexa nodded refusing to slow down.

“Me too.”

At that Clarke increased her pace and pressure bringing her over the edge. She began moaning and thrusting herself onto her fingers unable to hold back any moan or movement. She felt Clarkes tightening around her fingers and coming undone right along with her. Even as she rode out her own high onto Clarkes fingers she refused to slow down her own movements making sure the other girls orgasm lasted as long as possible.

They both stopped thrusting onto and into each other at the same time, neither removing their fingers for a moment, Lexa needed a moment to catch her breathe before any movement seemed possible.

After a couple of minutes when she could breathe normally she removed her fingers from inside of her running them through her folds for a moment to collect some of her wetness.

“That was amazing Clarke.” She pressed a kiss to her lips before putting her fingers that were coated in Clarkes wetness into her mouth so she could enjoy the girls taste. She closed her eyes to enjoy it, the most amazing thing she had ever tasted.

Her eyes popped open when she felt Clarke remove her fingers to see the girl bringing her own fingers to her lips to taste her. Lexa swore she would never see something as sexy for the rest of her life.

****Six Days Later****

Lexas POV

She was sitting on her couch with Raven on the floor and Lincoln sitting next to her. All of their parents were busy at work so they were trying to keep busy with a movies day.

Lexa was trying to tune out their bickering over what to watch next, focused on her phone.

Costia: Are they still fighting?

Lexa: Yeah, how do I make it stop?

Costia: I will be there in like 10, and will take care of it lol

Lexa: Sounds good.

She put her phone down, meeting with Costia earlier in the week hadn’t been too bad. She thought it would hurt to see the other girl so soon after their break up, even though they had talked, but she really only felt friendship. She had Clarke now, well for whatever it is that they were.

She tuned back into the bickering.

“No Lincoln I don’t want to watch a damn biker movie.”

Lexa couldn’t deal with these two much longer they were driving her crazy. “Will you two quit it?” She got up phone in hand and headed to her bedroom, she stopped on the stairs and turned back to the,” Costia will be here in a little let her in.” She finished walking up the stairs and to her room closing the door behind her.

Lexa felt at home in her room, it had been the guest bedroom when she first moved in but her adoptive mother Indra let her change it right away.

She threw herself onto her bed and stared at her phone screen for a while before deciding to call Clarke. She missed her, they texted a lot but it wasn’t the same. It rang a few times before an answer but when she heard her voice Lexa felt her stomach do a flip. It annoyed her how she had no control over her feelings.

“Lexa?”

“Hey, beautiful.” Her cheeks flushed at her own words, it was stupid of her to say that. She heard Clarke giggle a little and she stopped regretting it.

“Beautiful huh?” She frowned, she could hear the slur in Clarkes words, she didn’t like it.

“Clarke have you been drinking? It’s three on a Thursday.” She could hear music in the background and Clarke shushing people.

“Yeah I’m at one of my high school friends houses, we are hanging out. What are you doing?” Lexa took a deep breathe in, she worried about Clarke.

“Movie day with Lincoln, Cos, and Raven.”

“Hm hanging out with Costia again huh?” Lexa rolled her eyes at the obvious disapproval in Clarkes voice, the girl had no reason to worry.

“ClarKe.” She heard a huff and did her best to hold in her own laugh.

“Alexandria.” Her eyebrows furrowed.

“Don’t call me that.”

She heard Clarke laughing and some mumbled words.

“Wells quit it will you?” Lexa didn’t like this.

“Clarke?”

“Yeah?” She closed her eyes trying to stay calm.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t okay?”

“That’s the thing Lex I don’t know what you wouldn’t do.” Drunk Clarke was annoying and impulsive Lexa knew this and it worried her. She could just picture her and Niylah in her head playing over and over again.

“I wouldn’t touch anyone or let anyone touch me who isn’t you.” She could hear Clarke breathing but she didn’t say anything.

“Clarke, I only want you, I told you this, I’m not just…. I don’t do what we have done with anyone, it means something to me.” She heard a sigh.

“Wells is my best friend, everyone here is like my family… they were just making fun of me for how happy I got when I saw it was you calling. Hold on.” She could hear the music and laughter dying down as Clarke must have been walking away from them.

“Lex?”

“Still here.”

“I won’t do anything with anyone but you. I only think about you that way. I only want you.” Lexas heart began beating faster at Clarkes words.

“Yeah?”

“Yes beautiful.” She laughed at Clarkes words.

“Beautiful huh?”

“Shut up Lexa.” She laughed again but stopped when her room door was opened. Costia was standing in the door way watching her suspiciously not saying anything.

“Lexa?” She snapped out of the staring contest and focused back in on Clarke.

“Yeah sorry.”

“You have to go?” She thought about it for a moment, she didn’t want to hang up, but from Costias face she could tell the girl had heard parts of this conversation that she shouldn’t have.

“Yes. Can you call me when you get home?” She moved to sit up on the bed.

“Like hearing my voice?” She could feel herself blushing and tried to turn away so Costia wouldn’t see.

“A lot actually.”

“I will, goodbye Lexa.”

“Goodbye.” Lexa hang up her phone and put it down next to her, she looked up to see Costia hadn’t moved from the doorway. “Are you going to come in or just glare from over there?”

Costia walked over and sat on the opposite side of the bed, she had stopped looking at her. The lack of eye contact made Lexa feel a light ache in her heart. She didn’t want to hurt her friend.

“Say what you need to Cos.” Costia looked at her with a blank face, one that mirrored her own when she was trying to hide her thought and feelings.

“You met someone?”

“Yes.”

“Are you guys officially together.”

She shrugged pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. This wasn’t a conversation she wanted to have.  I don’t know, maybe, we haven’t spoken about it.”

Costia just nodded and stood from the bed, walking to the door.

“Costia?” She just shook her head without turning to look at her.

“We better get down there before those two kill each other.”

“Okay.” Lexa walked after her, she felt guilty, she didn’t have a reason to really, but no one wants to hurt their best friend.

They all settled back in on the couch and it only took them another twenty minutes to decide on watching The Heat.

Lexa thought the movie was funny, she was so zoned in that she jumped when she felt Costias hand on her leg. She was wearing one of her pair of shorts so Costia was touching her skin. She glanced to the side and saw that girl was laughing and seemed to be focused on the movie. But then she began rubbing circles with her thumb moving higher onto her leg.

All Lexa saw was Clarkes blue eyes in her mind, and she felt herself get nauseous at Costias touch. A touch she would have loved just three weeks earlier. She jumped up to her feet startling everyone around her. She just shook her head and sat herself on the floor as far from Costia as she could get.

She couldn’t calm herself down, she could feel how tense she was. She looked up to see Costia was watching her, she just shook her head at her and frowned. She felt her phone vibrate and looked to see that it was from no other than Clarke.

Clarke: I miss you.

Lexa took a deep breath in feeling herself relax at the message, she wished she could see her sooner.

Lexa: I miss you too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Love jealous and worried Clarke and Lexa. They are so damn cute, once we get back from vacation we will see how things progress for them and the story. As always you guys know I appreciate your comments! Let me know what you beautiful people think.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bed, Class, Gala drama, a little more drama?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy my loves, and thank you to those that constantly let me know what they think, I honestly appreciate your comments and feedback.

***Lexas POV***

(Wednesday morning)

She had been up almost half an hour already but she didn’t want to wake Clarke up until she actually had to. Lexa was running her fingers along the blondes bare hips hoping the movement would stir her. But apparently she was a heavy sleeper. She sighed knowing Clarke wouldn’t wake quickly.

She brushed the blonde hair out Clarkes face twisting her body so that Clarke was no longer on top of her but next to her. She traced Clarkes jaw, moving to press a kiss to it. That earned her a little stir from her. Lexa smiled and began pressing kisses all over Clarkes face hoping to wake her up.

She held in her laugh when she got a huff instead and Clarke turned putting her back to her.

“Why are you so insatiable Lexa, I’m too tired.”

Her eyes widened. She was insatiable!? Lexa sat up and moved so she was sitting on Clarke and held her hands above her head before she even had a chance to react.

“Lexa! Come on I’m tired.” Clarke was glaring beneath her, which made it really hard for her to keep a straight face.

“I’m insatiable Clarke? You woke me up in the middle of the night to have more sex. You haven’t been able to keep your hands off of me since we got back.”

She raised her eyebrow at her daring her to challenge her. Clarke just shrugged her shoulders the best she could with arms above her head.

“We have to go now or we are going to miss class.” Lexa released her hands and went to move off of her when Clarke grabbed her hips and pulled her into her, sliding her hands down so she was cupping her ass.

“Clarke, No.” Her response was to squeeze. Lexa rolled her eyes and went to move again when Clarke pulled her hips causing her grind down on to her. She felt the pleasure shoot through her body. She looked down to see Clarke looking at her with desire. Clarke repeated the movement and Lexa couldn’t stop herself from helping.

They repeated their movement and Lexa could feel herself getting wet, there was evidence of it on Clarke. She groaned out loud, letting what this was making her feel be the only thing she concentrated on. She closed her eyes enjoying the feeling knowing she would need more any moment.

Her eyes snapped open at her alarm going off, the alarm that let her know they should be walking out the door. She jumped off of Clarke before she could stop her.

“Lexa no.” She turned to see Clarke sitting up and pouting at her. She moved close enough to quickly kiss her lips knowing Clarke would try and grab her which she did attempt. He just shook her head and grabbed clothes walking towards the bathroom to wipe herself off before fully getting dressed.

She looked over her shoulder at Clarke who was still sitting in bed. “We have to leave. Get dressed.”

She went to the bathroom, trying to clean herself of her wetness. Leave it to Clarke to get her sexually frustrated before class. She just better be ready by the time she made it back to the room. Lexa pulled her shirt over her head and walked into the room to thankfully find a dressed Clarke waiting for her.

“I’m hungry.”

“Didn’t eat enough last night?” She raised her eyebrow but couldn’t keep the serious face at Clarkes blush.

“I could never have enough of you.” She pressed a kiss to her lips before making her way to the bathroom, Lexa put on her shoes and followed.

“I’m meeting Raven for food after class, she’s going to kill me if I blow her off again.”

“I doubt Octavia has even noticed I only slept in my bed Monday, she’s too busy getting it on with Lincoln.”

“Clarke!! I don’t want to hear about that!” Clarke laughed around her tooth brush. Lexa rolled her eyes at her through the mirror. She stepped behind her one hand around her waist and pushed the blonde hair one side revealing part of Clarkes neck. She began kissing it, placing her hand with the other around Clarkes waist. Clarke finished brushing her teeth while Lexa continued.

She looked up to see Clarke watching through the mirror. She pressed a light bite making Clarke moan. One of her hands made its way under Clarke shirt and began running over the smooth skin. She began squeezing one of her breasts, she could hear the change in the other girls breathing at her movements. She took her free hand and snuck it into Clarkes pants running her finger through her folds.

She moved her mouth to her ear where she swiped it with her tongue before she began to speak.

“Always so wet for me.” She just nodded in response. Lexa plunged a finger in without warning causing Clarke to moan. She began pressing into her hand trying to ride her finger, she added a second. She thrusted them in twice before removing her hand completely from Clarkes pants and her other from under Clarkes shirt.

Clarke spun on her instantly the frustration evident in her face, “What the fuck?!” Lexa just smirked and put the fingers that were covered in wetness in Clarkes mouth.

“We have class.”

She sucked them clean but when Lexa tried to remove them Clarke bit down.

“Clarke!” She rubbed her fingers and glared at the now smirking blonde.

“Don’t be a fucking tease.”

Clarke stormed past her and grabbed both their bags handing Lexa hers before closing the door behind them. Lexa looked at her fingers while they walked to class, she could see the teeth marks.

“Stop being a baby.”

She looked up to see Clarke watching her. “Oh I’m a baby?” Clarke just nodded. “You’re an ass, and you will be taking care of yourself tonight. “

Clarke watched her to see if she was serious or not, she probably couldn’t tell because she just looked forward without saying anything.

Clarkes POV

They got the class right as the professor began talking, taking their seats quickly. Clarke was slowly getting better at concentrating, mostly because of all the time she and Lexa had spent together since coming back. During class she still caught herself taking glances though.

How couldn’t she though. Alexandria Woods was sitting next to her. Alexandria Woods let her touch her, Alexandria Woods wanted to touch her. She felt herself shiver at the thought and readjusted in her seat clenching her thighs.

Lexa looked over and smiled at her knowingly, she rolled her eyes in response making Lexas smile grow wider. She watched as Lexa ripped a page from her book and wrote something down, before passing it to her.

“Doing okay over there?”

Clarke glared at her.

“NO”

Lexa just smiled at her and shrugged when she read her response.

“You know the athletes gala on Friday?”

“Yes?”

“Come with me?”

Clarke looked up eyes wide. Was Lexa asking her to be her date? Before she could respond Professor Kane announced it was the end of class and Lexa was getting up having already packed her stuff up. Clarke rushed to try and catch up to her. She reached her right as she reached the door, pulling on her arm, “Couldn’t wait for me?”

“Sorry, don’t want to keep Raven waiting.” She nodded following her into the hall where Raven was leaning against a wall. Lexa walked over and she trailed behind her feeling a little odd.

She saw Raven glance between them and she rolled her eyes, she couldn’t help it. Raven walked over to Raven and kept eye contact with Clarke before kissing Lexas cheek. Clarke stuck her tongue out and laughed when Lexa wiped it off with a groan.

“Hey Griffin.”

“Reyes.”

Lexa turned to her, “We are going to go eat, text me?” She nodded and was about to walk away when she felt Lexa grab her hand. “Will you go with me on Friday?”

Clarkes heart began beating hard and fast. What did this mean? But she knew she wouldn’t ever say no to Lexa. “I’d love to.” Lexa nodded, she was still holding onto her hand. Clarke watched as Lexa glanced between her and Raven seeming to be thinking about something.

She was taken by surprise when Lexa pulled her in quickly and pressed a fast but soft kiss to her lips before releasing her hand and giving her a little push in the opposite direction. Lexas face was turning red and Ravens eyes looked as if they were going to bulge out of her head.

 Clarke couldn’t help but laugh out loud before giving a little wave and turning to walk towards her room. Lexa just kissed her out in public in front of her best friend. Her heart was beating uncontrollably, she needed to figure out what they were as soon as possible. If Lexa was okay with kissing in front of people then she would kiss her every chance she got.

 She stopped at the sound of Ravens yelling.

“Fuck yeah Griffin, quench that thirst!”

She spun around to see Lexa slapping a hand over Ravens mouth and pulling her away, turning to mouth “Sorry” to her. Clarke just smiled and shook her head. She had work to do, the gala was a big night, everyone would be dressed up in gowns and suits, she needed to go shopping.

She pulled out her phone and to text Octavia.

“Mall. ASAP. 911”

***Friday***

Clarke and Octavia had been fighting in the bathroom for almost half an hour over the mirror. Two girls getting ready for this kind of event with just one bathroom was difficult to say at the least. Clarke was trying to curl the ends of her hair but Octavia kept bumping into her arm.

“Octavia, you are going to make me burn myself!”

Octavia just glared at her and continued to try and do braid design in her hair. “You don’t have to go Clarke, I do, so shut it, you are choosing this.

Clarke bumped her on purpose earning her a glare. “Lexa asked me to!”

“Are you guys a thing now or what, I have noticed you spent more time at her house than here this week you know.”

Clarke curled the last of her hair, ignoring the question, she simply didn’t have an answer to and walked out of the bathroom. She picked up her phone seeing that she and Octavia had fifteen minutes before Lincoln and Lexa picked them up. She decided to text her to make sure they were still on schedule.

Clarke: Everything okay?

Lexa: Lincoln will be here in like 5, then we are heading to you.

Lexa: Want me to go up and meet you at your door?

Clarke: Nope, only because I might not want to go anywhere if I get you near my bed ;)

Lexa: Keep it together Clarke.

Clarke: What if I can’t?

Lexa: I missed you last night, you staying over my place tonight right?

Her heart began to pound, she had missed her too. It felt weird to sleep in her own bed. She probably shouldn’t be sleeping over Lexas so often but… she couldn’t help it.

She put her dress on and sat back down.

Clarke: Yes.

Lexa: Good, Lincolns here see you in 5.

Clarke put her phone down and walked over to Octavia in the bathroom. “They are on their way, lets meet them down stairs.” Octavia nodded and followed her out of the bathroom.

Both girls sat to put their shoes on, Clarke grabbed her overnight bag with her, ignoring Octavias smirk when she noticed. Clarke looked herself over one more time, she wore a red dress that came down right below her knees.

It was fitted in all the right places showing off her curves, but looking classy at the same time. She hoped Lexa would like it. She hoped she really liked it.

“Stop worrying, you look beautiful.” Clarke looked up and smiled at Octavia who was watching her. “Ready?”

“Yes”

They took the elevator down, when they got out Lexa was standing there waiting for them. Clarke couldn’t help but drop her jaw at the site of her. She had her hair pinned up with some strays framing her face. Her lips looked amazing with red lipstick, her dress was a cream color that went down to the floor, and had slits on her hips. Lexa smiled when she saw her and seemed to be taking her in to view too.

Clarke took a step towards her, Lexa chuckled and lifted her chin to close her mouth. Clarke hadn’t realized she was gaping until then.

“Lexa. You look wow. Like wow. Amazing.”

“So do you Clarke.”

Clarke shook her head, “You can’t compare us, you are a goddess, I swear it’s official.” She turned to Octavia who was watching their exchange. “I mean, she can’t be human right? It’s impossible.”

Octavia rolled her eyes, “She is human Clarke, but you do look very beautiful Lexa.”

Lexa was trying to hide that she was beginning to turn red, but it just made her even more beautiful to Clarke.

“You look very nice too Octavia. But we have to go if we are going to make it on time.” Clarke nodded, Lexa grabbed her bag and turned, but Clarke couldn’t help but stop her from walking further.

The dress exposed her back, it was covered in jewels that were used as straps to hold it up. Clarke ran a finger between the jewels that’s cascaded down her back. She felt Lexa shiver and look back at her over her shoulder.

“Clarke.” Lexa just shook her head and grabbed her hand to make her walk, trying to make her snap out of it, but she just couldn’t. She spent the drive in a daze just staring at the beautiful woman next to her.

She even spent most of the time at the actual gala just sitting next to Lexa and staring at her, or staring and walking next to her.

“Clarke, please stop with the staring, I don’t think you have blinked for forty five minutes. You are making me nervous.”

She shook her head trying to clear it, “Sorry, I just couldn’t help it.” Lexa smiled at her and nodded her head. Clarke looked around the gala finally taking it in. It was actually beautiful. She turned to Lexa “I have to use the bathroom.”

Lexa pointed across the room to where it was located.

“Be right back.”

When she finished using the bathroom she began making her way back to Lexa who was sitting and talking to Lincoln at their table when she was spun around by someone grabbing her arm.

She took a breath of release when she saw who it was.

“Niylah.” She was smiling at her, so she smiled back, ready to turn around and head back. But Niylah pulled her in by her hips until there was only about six inches between their bodies.

“Clarke, how was your spring break? Haven’t seen you since last time we got interrupted.” Clarke knew she was flirting, she knew what Niylah wanted. She definitely didn’t want that though. She took a step back to get out of her grip but she just stepped with her.

“Um, it was good. But I better get back to my uhh table.” Niylah took another step forward closing the distance between them and moved to talk into Clarkes ear.

“You could always just sit with me babe.” Clarke placed her hands on Niylahs shoulders and moved her so she wasn’t touching her at all, making the girl to pout.

“I’m not here alone.”

 Niylah looked up and her face went ashen, she took another step back all by herself.

**Lexas POV**

She was watching for Clarke to come back when she spotted her making her way back towards the table. But then she saw Niylah trying to make her way towards her. Lexa felt the anger rise, but she kept her seat waiting to see what would happen. Lincoln had been talking to her but she tuned him out entirely.

She couldn’t do it she got up so fast she spilled a drink. She honestly didn’t give a shit she was focused.

She saw Niylah turn Clarke around and the two said hello, but when Clarke looked like she was going to walk away Niylah pulled her in closer. She had her hands on Clarkes hips, she was clearly flirting. Lexa could feel the heat radiating off of her own body. She stopped walking until she was just two or three feet behind Clarke wanting to see what she would do.

She had to force herself to stay still when Niylah stepped forward and began talking into Clarkes ear. She felt relief flush through her when Clarke pushed Niylah off and away from her. She stood her ground arms crossed and glaring.

“I’m not here alone.”

Lexa saw when Niylah spotted her. She looked like she was going to make a run for it, she would have found it amusing if she still didn’t feel a bit of jealousy at seeing them so close.

“Clarke?” She relaxed when Clarke turned and began smiling at the sight of her. She put her hand out for hers and Clarke took it without hesitation entwining their fingers.

“Niylah.”

Niylah looked from their hands up to their faces looking back and forth between them. “Lexa. Lexa and Clarke?”

Lexa just nodded her head at the question before turning back to Clarke. “Ready to go back to our seats?” Clarke nodded smiling before pressing a kiss to her cheek. Lexa lead the way, keeping their hands entwined for the rest of the night.

After that tiny hiccup the night went pretty well, while Lexa had complained about Clarkes staring she could not help but steal glances at her the entire night. At least she was less obvious about it.

With her free hand she would brush Clarkes hair back any moment it got in her face always earning her a small smile. She was ready to leave, she just wanted to be alone with this girl she couldn’t get enough of. She had never felt this way before.

She turned away from Clarke to see Lincoln and Octavia whispering and giggling to each other, she rolled her eyes. She just couldn’t help it.

“Are you guys ready to go home? I’m tired.” Lincoln looked up with bright red cheeks, probably from something Octavia had just whispered. Lexa was able to hold back her eye rolling this time, barely.

“Yeah we are.” Lexa nodded and stood up pulling Clarke to stand close to her. Clarke leaned in to whisper to her ear.

“Are you really tired?”

Lexa shook her head and went to whisper in Clarkes ear, “more like hungry.” She couldn’t help but lightly bite Clarkes ear before pulling away.

Clarke turned bright red, “Come on guys I’m so damn tired.” She tried to fake a yawn but it was so horribly bad. Lexa just tugged her away from the table and began walking towards the exit trying to hold on her laugh.

Thankfully the ride to her room was fast. “Goodnight guys, see you later.”

Lincoln and Octavia waved, both looking very impatient to leave.

Lexa wrapped her arm around Clarkes waist as they began walking into the building.

“Those were the worst fake yawns I have ever seen Clarke, like really bad.”

“Oh shush Lexa, I just wanted to get back here faster.” They had reached her floor and Lexa turned at the top of the stairs putting both hands on Clarkes hips as she walked backwards down the hall to her room.

“Yeah I know why you wanted to get back here fast.”

“And why was that Lex?”

It was a wonder they hadn’t fallen neither was paying attention to where they were going.

“I know you want me between your legs, but the question is Clarke what do you want first my tongue or my fingers.” Lexa went to pull Clarke in for a kiss when a voice behind her made her freeze.

“Yeah Clarke, which do you want first? I always preferred fingers first, she finishes so damn strong with her tongue.”

Lexa spun around and saw that she wasn’t losing her mind.

“Costia?” She felt Clarkes body stiffen behind her as she received a killer glare from the woman sitting in front of the apartment door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. And I told you things are going to be moving faster, I'm trying to decide if I will finish this fic in 25 chapter or more.... Hmm decisions? What do you think?


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fucking Costia!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved everyones reactions to the last chapter! So many different responses lol mostly everyone mad at me for bringing Costia back Lml. Sorry to have left you on a cliff hanger for so long but I graduated college yesterday! My graduation cap was decorated in a Lexa theme, it was awesome! Anyway hope you enjoy!

**Lexas POV**

“Lexa.” Costia stood across the hall watching her, her eyes flickered to Clarkes and she saw how her posture tensed and she glared like the look would make the woman behind her burst into flames. She could feel Clarkes body close behind hers, she looked back to see Clarke was mirroring Costias stance.

She wanted to relax her, to reassure her because she knew how much she must hate seeing Costia, let alone what her own reaction would have been to someone talking about Clarke the way Costia had spoken of her.

She kept watching Clarke until she looked back at her, they kept eye contact, Lexa tilted her head the side questioning if Clarke was okay without saying anything, she understood because she nodded in response which Lexa took as an okay.

She turned back to Costia, “What are you doing here?” Costia paused her glaring from Clarke to look at her with such sadness that Lexa almost took a step forward.

“I needed to see you babe, to talk to you, why have you been ignoring me? Is this bitch telling you not to talk to me?” Lexa felt her anger rise at Costia referring to Clarke that way. She felt Clarke start to take a steps forward.

“Who the hell do you think you are!?” Lexa grabbed Clarkes arm before she could actually pass her. She turned her so Clarke was facing her, she had never seen so much anger in her face before.

“Clarke. Please?” Clarke just shook her head in response, refusing to calm down. Lexa looked behind her to see Costia watching them barely able to contain her own anger. She couldn’t let this escalate.

“Costia don’t refer to Clarke that way, if you attack her you attack me.” Lexa placed her hands on Clarkes shoulder and leaned in to whisper to her, “Let me handle this, please baby.” She didn’t move until she got a response, Clarke took a moment to nod.

She knew Clarke needed something, when she pulled away she stopped to press a kiss to Clarkes cheek. She moved to step in front of her again.

“What the fuck Lexa? How could you do this?” Lexa looked around the hallway. She didn’t want to have this conversation in the hall where everyone could hear.

She reached behind her and took Clarkes hand, rubbing circles with her thumb, she reached the door and Costia just stood her ground, going back to glaring at Clarke. “We are going into the apartment, if you really do need to talk then come in, but I’m not doing this out here Costia.”

Costia nodded her head and moved out of the way, Lexa unlocked the door and stepped in pulling Clarke behind her. Costia walked in right after them. Lexa turned to her and pointed to where her room was, throwing the keys at her.

Costia nodded and began walking to the room. Lexa turned to Clarke who looked confused and pissed off. “What are you doing Lexa?” She pulled her hand out of hers and Lexa felt her heart clench at the rejection.

“Clarke.” She went to touch Clarkes face but she took a step away so Lexa wouldn’t touch her.

“Clarke, I’m just going to talk to her real quick that’s it, and then she will go. She just needs to be set straight. Please, don’t make this into a fight between us.”

She put her hand out for Clarke but she wouldn’t even look at her. Lexa felt her heart clench again, she had to fix this as soon as possible, it hurt her seeing Clarke like this with her.

“Baby? I will fix this, just, please don’t leave.” She hoped Clarke understood that she meant she didn’t want Clarke to leave the apartment but she also meant she didn’t want her to leave her too. She waited for a response but Clarke gave none. She just turned away and sat on a chair facing the window, back to her.

Lexa stood for a moment just watching her before she turned towards her room ready to put an end to whatever this was.

She took a deep breath before entering the room.

Costia was sitting on her bed legs crossed, tears rolling down her face. Lexa glanced behind her deciding to close the door.

She moved to sit on the other side of the bed putting as much distance between them as possible.

“Costia?” It took a moment for her to calm herself down. The part of Lexa that recognized Costia as her friend wanted to comfort her but the tug on her heart she knew was for the girl out in the living room, so she made no move to get closer.

“How Lexa? I thought you loved me?”

Lexa tilted her head to the side trying to figure out how to handle this the best way possible.

“I did Cos, you know I did.” Costia just shook her head, as tears streamed down her face.

“You don’t love me anymore?”

“I do.” Costia went to move towards her but Lexa put her hand up to stop her. “I’m not in love with you, but I love you, always will, we spent three years together, but you can’t do this.”

She could see how much her denial hurt her, but still all she wanted was to get back to Clarke, she was scared that she would turn her away now and she couldn’t let that happen.

“Do what exactly Lexa?”

“Show up here out of nowhere, act like you have some sort of claim on me. You don’t, we broke up.”

“It took so long for you to move on huh? Tell me Lexa, how long were you fucking her behind my back?”

Lexa felt her anger rise she jumped up and walked around the bed to stand in front of Costia.

“Don’t you fucking dare Costia! I never cheated on you and you know it!”

Costia was glaring at her, “So you never touched your whore until after we broke up? Thanks I appreciate it.”

Lexa wanted to shake her, who was this hateful person in front of her? “I swear to god Costia, if you say one more thing about her, you can leave right now and we will never talk again. She is mine and you will not talk about her like that.”

“Is she the one you left me for that weekend?” She knew she wasn’t going to like the answer, but she wouldn’t lie.

“Yes.” She moved to the door and sat in front of it on the floor.

“You said she was just a friend who needed you.”

“She was.”

“Did you have feelings for her then?”

Lexa closed her eyes and breathed in. She saw flashes of her times with Clarke before that weekend with Costia. She thought of how annoying Clarke was, how despite that she loved it when she was close. She had loved waking up to her, fighting with her, and just being with her. She had felt a physical attraction to her early on, she couldn’t deny that.

She pictured Clarkes blonde hair, her pale skin, but most of all her blue eyes, always so beautiful. She heard her laugh in her mind and it brought peace to her heart, just the thought of it making her relax. Her eyes snapped open at her realization, she was falling in love with her. Just the thought of losing her brought a pain to her that she had never felt before. What she felt for Clarke was incomparable to what she had with Costia, with Clarke it was so much more.

She looked at Costia who was still waiting for an answer.

“Yes.”

Costia just nodded accepting it.

“What happened to Nia, I thought you were going to try things with her?”

“She isn’t you Lex, it was never going to work.”

“You will find someone else Costia. But we are done.”

The tears began rolling down her face again.

“You love her don’t you?”

Lexa breathed in deeply, “I’m falling in love with her.”

Costia looked down and covered her eyes with her hands. “I wish you weren’t.” She didn’t have a response for that. She just watched her quietly.

“I don’t think we can be friends anymore.” Costias head snapped up at that.

“No Lexa, you don’t mean that.”

She watched her gaging her reaction, “I do mean that, you need to move on, and I can’t expect Clarke to be okay with us being friends anymore after what you just pulled. I won’t lose her because of you. I can’t.”

Costia began to cry harder. Lexa just kept sitting and waited for her to calm down.

Once she thought Costia was calm enough she began to talk.

“There isn’t a bus back to your school until the morning. You can stay here tonight. I’m going to leave with Clarke and spend the night in her room. Don’t be here when we get back tomorrow.”

She got up and moved to her drawers grabbing pajamas and sweat pants for her to wear in the morning.

“Lexa?” She turned and looked at Costia who had laid herself down and was just watching her. “You look beautiful. I’m going to remember you like this.”

She ignored what she said and walked over to the door, “Goodbye Costia,” she turned towards the door, “don’t call me, or text me, and don’t come back here again.” She opened the door and stepped out closing it behind her taking a deep breathe in.

She walked to the living room and she felt like the world stopped for a moment. Clarke was gone.

**Clarkes POV**

Seeing Lexas ex had made her so angry and it made her realize how she really didn’t know where she and Lexa stood. She knew Lexa cared for her and that they had agreed to only be physical with each other. But besides that what did this more than friends thing they had going on actually mean?

Now that ex was glaring at her and all Clarke could hear in her mind was the repetition of “I always preferred fingers first, she finishes so damn strong with her tongue.” The idea of Lexa touching anyone that wasn’t her caused her to forget to breathe. It made her want to break things, to destroy something.

She focused in on Lexa watching her, she knew she was checking to see if she was okay. She wasn’t but she nodded anyway.

She couldn’t focus, she couldn’t think, she couldn’t breathe. She was going to lose her.

“I needed to see you babe, to talk to you, why have you been ignoring me? Is this bitch telling you not to talk to me?”

Clarke was ready to snap. It wasn’t even at Costia calling her a bitch it was her choice of reference to Lexa. Lexa was hers. She walked forward, she wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“Who the hell do you think you are!?” She felt Lexa grab her and next thing she knew she was facing her.

“Clarke please.” She shook her head, she couldn’t just stand here and do nothing. “Costia don’t refer to Clarke that way, if you attack her you attack me.”  She felt Lexas hands on her shoulders, the touch making her relax slightly.

“Let me handle this, please baby.” The term of endearment whispered into her ear cleared her head slightly. She needed to calm down for Lexa, her being upset would only make things worse. She nodded.

Lexa pressed her lips to her cheek before pulling away, and all Clarke wanted to do was pull her back in and press a kiss to her lips so that Costia would get the point but she controlled her instincts.

“What the fuck Lexa? How could you do this?”

Clarke looked towards the wall, if she looked at her she wasn’t going to be able to control herself. Lexa grabbed her hand and rubbed her thumb over her hand repeatedly, the motion calming her slightly.

“We are going into the apartment, if you really do need to talk then come in, but I’m not doing this out here Costia.”

Clarkes eyes widened. Was Lexa serious? She must have been because next thing she knew she was being pulled into the apartment and Lexa was giving Costia the key to her room. What the fuck was happening and why was Costia going into Lexas bedroom?

“What are you doing Lexa?” She pulled her hand out of Lexas, she felt betrayed, why was this happening?

“Clarke.” Lexa went to touch her but she pulled away, she couldn’t do this, she couldn’t let her do this.

“Clarke, I’m just going to talk to her real quick that’s it, and then she will go. She just needs to be set straight. Please, don’t make this into a fight between us.”

What was this us Lexa was referring to because Clarke certainly didn’t know. She wanted to know, needed to know. What were they, whatever they were was it enough for Lexa to choose her?

She could see Lexa reaching out for her but she couldn’t bring herself to look at her. She knew if she did she wouldn’t be able to do it. She would break down and cry, she couldn’t do that right now. If she felt her skin or saw her green eyes she wouldn’t be able to hold it in.

“Baby? I will fix this, just, please don’t leave.”

 Clarke closed her eyes for a moment trying to control her emptions. She moved and sat herself down in the chair. She heard Lexa walking away from her, when she heard the bedroom door close she couldn’t help but whisper, “Please don’t leave me.”

She was able to sit for less than thirty seconds after the door closed. She needed to know what was being said.

“Costia?” Clarke could hear the sniffles of the other girl through the door.

“How Lexa? I thought you loved me?” Clarke felt her anger rise, but also her doubts. They had been together for years, she knew Lexa had loved her. She had been the one to comfort her over their breakup.

“I did Cos, you know I did.” Lexa saying that hurt her, she knew it shouldn’t, she has only known Lexa for a month, Lexa had a life before her.

“You don’t love me anymore?” Clarke held her breathe, she pressed her ear to the door. She needed to know Lexas answer, it was the only thing that mattered in this moment.

“I do.” Clarke couldn’t move for a moment her mind was blank, and then she heard the creak of the bed, which meant they were on her bed. She couldn’t do this. She ran as quietly and as quickly to the door as she could.

When she felt the cool air hit her face she couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. She should have known, hell she had known. Three fucking years of dating her best friend, of course she still loved her. Maybe they were meant to be, maybe she had been a distraction for her.

She began walking towards her own room. She needed to be alone, her heart felt like it had been ripped out of her chest and squeezed to its breaking point.

She had never felt this kind of pain before, but she had never felt so strongly for anyone in her entire life. She had to let her go. But when she closed her eyes she was all that she could see.

The thought of being with anyone else made her sick, how was she going to do this? She was falling in love with Alexandria Woods and in mere minutes she had lost her.

At this very moment while her heart was breaking Costia was probably touching her. She wondered briefly if Lexa came out of the room to tell her to go home before they began having sex or if she even remembered she had been there.

The thought of someone else’s hands taking Lexa out of that dress made her sick, the idea of Lexa kissing down anyone else’s body but  her own was an image she couldn’t handle.

When she made it up to her room she was relieved to find that it was empty, she laid herself on her bed letting the tears fall freely. Lexa loved Costia, she wanted Costia, and there was nothing she could do about it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarke jumped to conclusions but can you blame her?


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confrontation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What are they going to do? Find out below lol

**Lexas POV**

She walked back to her side of the apartment looking in the bathroom, but there was no Clarke. Lexa could feel the tears coming to her eyes. She sat in the chair she had left Clarke in and pulled her legs up to her chest, letting the tears fall freely.

Clarke left her. She didn’t give her a chance. She didn’t want Costia, she hadn’t since she met Clarke, and even though she still tried a little at the beginning, Clarke had been finding her way into her heart without permission.

She couldn’t let this be their end, it wasn’t right, it felt so wrong to not be with Clarke, she just had to make her see that. Lexa stood and looked down at her dress, she needed to change now. She couldn’t walk in this all the way to Clarkes room where she hoped to find her, and she forgot to grab sneakers and a shirt earlier.

She looked at her bedroom door and sighed, she walked towards it and opened the door as quietly as possible, praying that Costia was asleep. She stepped in seeing that she was under the covers.

She took off her shoes off by the door and put them down before tip toeing to her drawers. She grabbed a shirt, jeans, and her sneakers. She unzipped her dress, but then remembered Costia was in the room so she held the ends together and walked towards the door.

“I love you Lex, always will.”

She looked over her shoulder for a moment before walking out of the room, shook her head and stepped out closing the door behind herself. She changed quickly in the bathroom before looking at her bag with pajamas, wondering if she should take it or not.

What if Clarke refused to see her? She looked back at her room, she couldn’t come back here until tomorrow anyway. If Clarke wouldn’t have her she would stay the night at Ravens.

Lexa began walking, still scared that Clarke wouldn’t want her, but she was too stubborn not to try. Her heart wouldn’t let her, and Lexa was going to listen.

She made it to ark tower and stood in front of Clarkes door, she couldn’t do it, she was scared of rejection, she pressed her back against the door and slid down it. She just needed a moment, she needed to be able to handle the possibility that Clarke didn’t want her.

Lexa closed her eyes trying to control her breathing, she needed to calm herself down. Her eyes snapped open at the sound of footsteps coming closer. She looked over to see none other than Finn Collins, his eyes widened when he saw her filled with anger.

She stood as fast as she could tensing up. “What are you doing here Collins?”

“I could ask you the same thing Lexa.”

“Fuck off and go home or how about to hell, but hey there’s no difference between the two for you.”

“Fuck you Bitch, you will get what’s coming to you soon enough.”

“Yeah because I’m the bad guy right? You hurt my best friend and are lucky I don’t kick your ass right now.” She took a step closer to him causing him to step back.

“You took her from me, you will pay for that and so will she.”

Lexa glared at him taking another step forward, but Finn being the coward he was stepped back again.

“Are you delusional Finn, you lost Raven because of you not me?”

He gave her a confused look, glancing at the door behind her and back to her a couple of times. She couldn’t understand him. But then he smiled at her as if he knew something she didn’t, it made her skin crawl. “I will see you two soon enough Lexa, goodnight.”

She watched him walk back from where he had come, if she didn’t have to deal with Clarke at this moment she would have kicked his ass royally. But she had her priorities right now and Clarke came first. She turned to face the door, Clarke would always come first.

Lexa took a deep breathe in and knocked on the door.

**Clarkes POV**

She doesn’t know when she fell asleep it couldn’t have been long, her pillow was still wet from her tears, she rolled over wondering what had even woken her up, when there was a second knock on her door. She sat up quickly her mind automatically thinking it was Finn.

She reached for her phone to call someone when she heard a voice.

“Clarke please be home.”

She froze putting her phone down on the bed. Lexa? What was she doing here?

She stood up and walked as quietly as she could to the door, she could hear Lexa shuffling her feet on the other side. She reached for the lock but her hand froze.

Lexa knocked lightly one more time, Clarke leaned her forehead against the door, trying to bring up the courage to open the door. She was scared.

She heard the sound of footsteps walking away and panicked swinging the door open. She stepped out and looked down the hallway.

“Lexa?”

She saw Lexa walking towards the stairs but she paused when she called her name. Lexa turned around and Clarke could tell from her eyes that she had been crying. It made her heart clench. She took in that Lexa had changed her clothes. She closed her eyes trying to make the image of Costia taking it off of her out of her mind.

“Clarke?” When Clarke opened her eyes Lexa was standing in front of her. She reached out to touch her but Clarke stepped back into her room out of reach leaving the door open so Lexa could come in. If she let Lexa touch her she would break.

She heard her sigh but follow her into the room. Clarke walked and sat on her bed motioning for Lexa to sit in the chair, she ignored her and sat on the bed too.

“You left me.” She knew it wasn’t a question, but a statement, she couldn’t help but respond.

“Yes.”

“Why? I asked you not to.”

She felt herself getting frustrated, she couldn’t do this very long, she was going to break. She ran her fingers through her hair trying to think of her response.

“To avoid this Lexa. Go be with Costia, I will be fine.”

“You don’t…….” She could hear the shakiness in Lexas voice. ”You don’t want me anymore? That’s it, it’s that easy?”

Clarke looked at Lexa to see tears running down her face, Lexa was trying her best to wipe them away as fast as they came, but she was failing.

“You love her go be with her.”

“Clarke I don’t love her, please just listen to me.”

She cut her off before she could say anymore. “I heard you Lexa, she asked you if you loved her and you said yes, that’s all I needed to hear. I left as soon as you said it.”

“Clarke no.”

“No Lexa, I thought you cared about me, I should have known I was just a distraction. It was stupid of me to think we were more.”

“Clarke.”

“No, just don’t, I will get over you.”

“Clarke you aren’t listening to me!”

“I don’t want to hear anything Lexa!”

She jumped off of the bed and moved to walk away when Lexa grabbed her and pulled her towards her, one hand on each of Clarkes arms. She went to pull away but Lexa wouldn’t let go.

“Get off of me.”

“No! You are being stubborn and not listening to a word I’m saying, you’re stuck in your own head Clarke.”

Clarke closed her eyes trying to block Lexa out. She was going to cry, she could feel the tears forming. She fought it as long as she could, but then a tear escaped and Lexa wiped it away before it could go anywhere.

She just wanted to be in Lexas arms, but she didn’t want to get hurt, she couldn’t do this if Lexa walked away from her. The tears didn’t stop. Lexa pulled her into her making her go back onto the bed so she was sitting on her lap and Lexa wrapped her arms around her.

Lexa began to whisper in her ear as she rocked her. “I want you Clarke, I want you. Please don’t.” She could hear Lexa sniffle and she pulled away to see she was crying to. “I told her I chose you, I told her but you left. I asked you not to leave.”

She was trying to register Lexas words.

“You chose me?” Lexa nodded, and Clarke heart felt so much lighter by that one movement.

“But I heard you tell her you loved her?”

“As a friend Clarke, you missed the part where I said I was falling in love with you.”

Clarkes heart began beating wildly, was this really happening?

“You are falling in love with me?” Lexa nodded her head again, her tears were slowing down.

“But… really? I mean you want me?” Lexa gave her a small smile as she wiped away the last of her tears.

“Why is that so hard for you to believe?”

“We never defined what we were Lexa, and you and her have such a history I saw her and in my mind you were already gone.”

Lexa shook her head, running her thumbs over Clarkes cheeks. Clarke welcomed the touch, She had her own hands clasped behind Lexas neck.

“I told you, you were mine and I was yours Clarke. That’s all I wanted, I didn’t want to rush you. If you wanted to define our relationship more all you had to do was say it. I would have loved to have been your girlfriend.”

Clarke pressed her forehead to Lexas still trying to process the conversation they were having.

“You would have loved to be my girlfriend?” Lexa nodded.

“I would still love to be your girlfriend Clarke.”

“Yeah?”

“More than anything.”

Clarke pressed her lips to Lexas and she responded right away but pulled back after a moment. “You can’t do this again Clarke, don’t assume the worst from me. I need you to trust me.”

Clarke nodded and went in to kiss her again but Lexa pulled back raising an eyebrow at her. “I trust you Lexa, do you trust me?”

“I trust you completely, I don’t trust easily Clarke.”

She took a moment to think about Lexas past and how she knew Lexa trusting her was a big deal.

“Lexa?”

“Yeah?”

Clarke placed her face into Lexas neck breathing her in finding the courage to tell her what she was feeling. “I’m falling in love with you too. Will you be my girlfriend?”

Lexa pulled her away so that they were looking at eachother, she put her finger on her chin and pretended to think. She pushed her shoulder, making Lexa laugh.

“I would love to baby.”

Clarke smiled and kissed Lexas lips, her tongue swiping at Lexas bottom lip. The kiss began to deepen but Clarkes position kept her from moving too much. She got off of Lexas lap to get into a better position but Lexa stopped her and made her stand before her while she took her in.

“Why haven’t you changed out of your dress?” Clarke just shrugged, she hadn’t been in the emotional state to care about what she was wearing when she got home.

“Turn around.” Clarke listened right away, she recognized that rasp in Lexas voice.

**Lexas POV**

Clarke turned as soon as the words left her mouth. She found the zipper and pulled It down. She felt her tense up.

“When did your dress come off Lexa?”

Lexa stopped her hands movements from sliding the dress off of Clarke, she knew what Clarke was insinuating but she couldn’t believe she actually had to explain herself.

She dropped her hands to her legs and closed her eyes trying to calm herself down, she wouldn’t say anything she would regret later. When she felt calm enough to answer she opened her eyes find Clarke was facing her.

“Are you really asking me if Costia and I had sex?” Clarke just nodded at her waiting for an answer. Lexa jumped to her feet and began pacing back and forth. “I can’t believe you Clarke, after everything I just told you, you still have to ask that? What kind of person do you think I am!?”

“Is that a no?”

“Fucking obviously it’s a no!”

“Okay.” Lexa turned and glared at her, she tells the girl she is falling in love with her and this is what she gets.

“I just needed to hear you say it Lexa.”

“You just said you trusted me, apparently you lied.”

Clarke shook her head and closed the distance between them, “it’s not that I swear it was just going to eat at me if I didn’t ask, I knew the answer but I just needed to hear it okay?”

Lexa looked at the girl standing in front of her and sighed, she understood that, but it still bothered her. She would let it go, it wasn’t worth it.

“Okay.”

Clarke grabbed her hands and pulled her back towards the bed and sat her down, she stood between her legs and just watched her. Lexa stared back, neither making a move.

“You’re staring Clarke.”

“So are you.” Lexa just shrugged her shoulders. Clarke began tracing her facial features and she let her. Her hands moved along her jaw and traced her lips, when Clarkes hand was on her lips she couldn’t help bite her finger lightly. She saw how that made Clarkes eyes darken.

“Are we okay Lex?” Lexa took in the beautiful girl standing in front of her, she couldn’t stay upset with her for long it was impossible, Clarke was her weakness.

“Yes.” Clarke nodded and moved her hands to her hair taking out all the pins that were holding it up. Lexa felt her hair fall to her shoulders and down her back, she shook her head to loosen it more.

Clarke took a piece of her hair and twirled it around her finger, while watching her. “How can you be so beautiful Lexa? How could you be so beautiful and still want me when you could have anyone?”

Lexa hated Clarke talking like this, as if she didn’t deserve her, as if she wasn’t good enough. She pulled Clarke closer to her and kissed lips quickly, she moved her hand to her eyes. “I love your eyes, they are the most amazing blue I have ever seen.” She ran a finger along her nose, “when you concentrate you scrunch your nose, it’s really cute.” She tugged on Clarkes ear, “when I whisper in your ear it makes you shiver, I love it when that happens.”

She traced her lips and pressed another quick kiss, “You have the softest lips ever, I could kiss you forever.” She moved and kissed Clarkes neck, “one of my favorite things is how sensitive you are right here.” She pulled Clarkes dress down a slightly revealing her shoulders, “I love your shoulders,” She pulled the dress down to her waist unhooking her bra in seconds. She ran her fingers up and down her back making her shiver, “Your back is so smooth and flawless.” She pulled back and looked at Clarkes breast cupping one and popping the nipple of the other into her mouth.

She sucked lightly and then pulled her mouth away to look Clarke in her eyes, “Your breasts are also perfect, in size, shape and softness.” She stood up and pulled Clarkes dress all the way down  before making her lay on the bed.

“Lexa.” Clarke was pouting, she knew she wanted her to touch her more but she was proving a point. She moved onto Clarke and began kissing down between her chest to her hip bones, she stopped at her stomach looked up and smirked before pressing her lips to her stomach and blowing making Clarke giggle and swat at her head. Lexa laughed, “I love how you are ticklish right there.”

Lexa sat back and grabbed Clarkes foot, “I love how we argue constantly about your stinky toes,” Clarke rolled her eyes at her so she just winked in response. She ran her hands up and down the pale legs, “your legs are quite sexy, I love it when you wear shorts around my room, very nice to look at.”

She took Clarkes hand in hers and played with her fingers, “I love your fingers for the art they create, and well how good they make me feel.” She winked at the blonde again releasing her hand after pressing a kiss to it.

She pulled Clarkes underwear down and went to lay next to her. She ran her fingers through her folds, smiling at how wet she was and how she began to pant. She plunged a finger in, “I love how you are always wet by the time I touch you.” She pulled her finger out and Clarke whined her complaint. She brought her fingers to her mouth licking them clean, “I love your taste, I want to taste you every single day.” She moved and laid her body half on to Clarkes.

She placed a hand on the left side of her chest and one moving around her scalp. “But my two favorite things about you are how smart you are and how loving you are, I don’t ever want you to change, if anything Clarke you are too good for me and  I will do my best to make you happy, especially since you are now my beautiful, amazing, perfect girlfriend.”

Clarke grabbed her by her neck and crashed their lips together, her tongue finding hers instantly. Lexa moaned into the kiss and went to move her hand to Clarkes wetness when she grabbed her hand and pulled away from the kiss.

“Take your clothes off baby.” Lexa nodded and stepped off of the bed quickly stripping her clothes off, she paused and looked down at Clarke, she was so beautiful.

She climbed onto the bed and placed a leg between Clarkes as they began kissing again. She could feel how wet she was, she pressed her leg in harder and began grinding it into the girl beneath her. Clarke gripped onto her ass and pulled her in even more and began thrusting onto her.

Clarke was moaning loudly into her ear, she felt her tense beneath her and knew she was close, she went to move away so she could use her fingers but Clarke wouldn’t release her hold.

“Let me cum like this Lex, please. Please don’t stop.” Lexa couldn’t stop the smirk on her face if she tried, she loved to hear Clarke beg her. She went back to grinding her leg right where she knew Clarke needed it and took only a couple of seconds before Clarke was biting down on her shoulder to stifle the sounds she was making. She could feel the pain from the bite but it was almost as if seeing Clarke unravel before her caused an out of body experience because all she cared about was not missing a moment of it.

She removed her leg and moved down Clarkes body. She spread her legs and moved to clean her up with her mouth but paused when Clarke spoke.

“Wait Lex, I need a moment.” She tilted her head trying to decide.

She shrugged her shoulders before saying, “shut up Clarke,” and diving tongue first into her. She licked lightly at first avoiding her clit because she knew it would be too sensitive for the moment. She decided instead to plunge her tongue into her, after a moment Clarke began moaning and thrusting into her, she took a chance a rubbed her nose against Clarkes clit once to see what reaction she would get.

“Fuck Lexa, do that again.” She smiled to herself repeating the movement. Clarke grabbed her by her head and began grinding onto her face. She knew that meant she was close. She was right, after a couple more seconds of grinding she began clenching around her tongue.

Once her orgasm was over Clarke pulled her up her body by her hair and pulled her into kiss. Lexa jumped when two fingers were thrust into her making her stretch quickly. She couldn’t help but let out a breathy, “Clarke.” She moved her hips in sync with her hand.

When Clarke found the spot that made her squirm she focused on it. She felt Clarkes other hand on her shoulder pushing her to sit up, she did as was wanted. She didn’t remove her fingers and instead used her free hand to move Lexa up and down onto them by her hip.

She looked down to see the other girl biting her bottom lip taking her in completely, the sight turned her on even more, it helped that Clarke was still fucking her exactly as she needed it.

“Ride my fingers until you Cum. ” Clarkes voice was so raspy and the words themselves so  dirty that it pushed Lexa closer to the edge, she began moving faster trying so hard to jump over it.

“I know you are close Lexa, I feel you tightening around me. I feel how wet you are, you are dripping down my hand. I just want to taste you please let me taste you soon. I don’t think I can wait.”

She closed her eyes concentrating on her words, they shoved her over the edge. “I’m cumming Clarke, shit baby, it’s so damn strong, I can’t.” She collapsed onto Clarkes chest her body trembling uncontrollably. She let out a breath when she felt Clarke remove her fingers, she rolled onto her side so she wouldn’t crush her girlfriend. She peeked an eye open to see Clarke licking her fingers clean.

She hummed in content and pulled Clarke close to her, she snuggled her face into the blondes neck. “Sleep Clarke.” She felt her nod and move an arm around her shoulders to hold her.

“Goodnight girlfriend.” Lexa chuckled lightly pressing a kiss to Clarkes neck.

“Goodnight baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy? Sort of? I know you all are just wanting Lexa to figure out Clarke and Finns connection, it will happen soon I promise!
> 
> In other news my fave couple on youtube, BFvsGF, just broke up... that's depressing :(


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What are they going to do? School is almost over. And the moment you all have been waiting for. (Sort of)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy, we have 2-3 chapters left guys. I have been thinking about ideas for another fic to start after this one let me know if you have any suggestions!

**One Week Later**

**Clarkes POV**

She was never so happy to be left handed in her life, until she met Lexa, at this moment sitting in class both of them taking notes with their fingers still intertwined. Struggling with scissors and always having ink on her hand seemed worth it now.

She could tell that Mr. Kane noticed, he even gave her a little smirk once and she couldn’t help but blush slightly. She paused in her note taking to look at Lexa.

She was concentrating so hard, with her glasses perched on the end of her nose. Clarke couldn’t help but lift their hands and press a kiss to the back of Lexas, making her look at her and give her a quick smile before going back to work. She sighed and followed suit.

The end of class came pretty fast thankfully, she stood up packing her stuff.

“Woods, Griffin, can I speak to you both?” Clarkes eyes widened and she looked at Lexa who also had a confused expression on her face, but she just shrugged and began walking towards him.

Clarke followed behind her.

“Yes Mr.Kane?”

“I just wanted to check in and see how you two are doing.”

She felt her face turn red and couldn’t even look at him, thankfully Lexa was able to handle it.

“We are good ser, I am actually thankful you made us work together. Clarke has taught me a lot.”

“I can see that, both of your works have been amazing and I am looking forward to your final paper, don’t disappoint me.”

“We won’t, thank you.”

Clarke looked up then and nodded her goodbye to him before turning and half running out of the room, with Lexa trailing behind. She stopped outside of the door, and took a deep breathe in waiting for Lexa to come out.

What she didn’t expect was the glare she got from her right away. Lexa walked past her without saying anything. Clarke scrambled to catch up.

“Lexa, whats wrong?”

“Nothing, I’m going to get food.”

“Babe, talk to me.”

She didn’t expect Lexa to spin on her so fast and jumped back. “What was that Clarke? So he saw us holding hands, you are that embarrassed to be with me?”

She froze, that definitely wasn’t what it was. She was honestly just confused at the same time, Lexa had never shown any real insecurities so for her this was definitely uncharted territory having to reassure her.

She reach forward and cupped Lexas cheek, “Babe, I would never be embarrassed to be with you, have you seen how hot you are?” Lexa rolled her eyes.

“I don’t mean look wise Clarke.. I mean because I am a girl. Have you told anyone about us?”

Raven, Lincoln, and Octavia know.”

“I told Raven and Lincoln, and then Lincoln told Octavia. Have you told anyone Clarke?”

She frowned, she hadn’t told anyone. She didn’t realize until that moment. She hadn’t even told Wells yet.

“No, but I will Lexa I swear. I’m not ashamed to be with a girl, you should know that. I have just been so absorbed in being with you, I haven’t really spoken to my friends much recently.”

She could tell Lexa was trying to decide if she was going to believe her not. She moved forward to press a kiss to her lips, she sighed in relief when Lexa kissed her back.

“I can totally find a speaker and announce that you are my girlfriend to the whole campus, maybe then people would stop checking you out so much, it gets annoying. I might have to pee on you to mark my territory I swear.”

She smiled as Lexa chuckled and shoved her shoulder lightly before taking her hand and walking towards the cafeteria.

“If you pee on me, you will be single Clarke Griffin.”

She put her finger to her chin pretending to think about it and then shrugged, “fine I will think of something else then.”

Lexa just shook her head with a smile on her face. Clarke watched her thinking how lucky she was, Lexa never let a fight or disagreement come between them or ever held it against her. It was harder for her to that but she was working on it, Lexa was worth it.

She needed to prove that she was willing to tell anyone.

“Lexa?”

“Yeah baby?”

“When my parents pick me up after finals week in three weeks will you meet them?”

Lexa stopped walking and turned towards her. “You want me to meet your parents?”

“Of course, they should meet you before I ask them if you can come visit over summer and stay with us.”

Lexas eyes widened, making Clarke frown.

“You want me to visit and stay with you during the summer?”

“Lexa, how did you plan on doing long distance during the break?”

She shrugged, “I’m not good with long distance Clarke.”

Clarke lost her breathe for a moment, she closed her eyes willing herself not to panic and freak out like she has done before without letting Lexa explain herself. She opened her eyes, Lexa was watching her confused.

“Are you planning on breaking up with me? “

Lexas eyes widened even more if that was possible.

“No! Ofcourse not, I’m just saying I don’t know how to do long distance babe, not that I don’t want to try. Long distance..” She shrugged her shoulders,” I did it for years with Costia and I might as well have been single for it. I don’t want that to be us.”

Clarke felt herself relax, “that’s why I’m saying you will be visiting me throughout the summer, and I’d like to visit you too babe. If that’s okay with you.”

Lexa smiled and pulled her in and wrapped her in a hug, she returned it automatically and they just stood that way for a bit. “I want nothing more than to have you in my home Clarke. My parents will love you by the way.”

“You think so?” She felt a kiss pressed to her forehead before Lexa pulled away.

“They have no choice, I’m not letting you go.”

Hearing Lexa say that made her happier than she had ever been. She looked at her as they continued walking, and it hit her. She was in love, no longer just falling. She wanted to tell her, she wanted to tell everyone but she had to make it special. It had to be the perfect moment.

**Lexas POV**

She couldn’t help but glance at Clarke multiple times as they walked back to her room after grabbing some food. She was beautiful.

She opened the door and made her way to her room, Clarke trailing close behind. When she opened the door Clarke wasted no time laying on her side of the bed and turning the tv on.

“You know, you’re extremely comfortable here Clarke, you basically have your own drawer too.”

Clarke stuck her tongue out at her. “I offered to sleep in my room, and what did you say Lexa?”

She rolled her eyes ignoring the question.

“You said I couldn’t because my bed was too little for both of us.”

“Well it is! That one night you basically slept on top of me, my back just stopped hurting.”

“No one said you would be sleeping there with me.”

She huffed and crossed her arms, “don’t act like you don’t want to sleep with me every night. If you went to sleep in your room you would show up at my door in the middle of the night.”

Clarke crawled towards her and pulled her to sit before pressing a kiss to her cheek, “you are probably completely right. Plus I need clothes here or we would constantly have to go to my room.”

Lexa nodded moving so she was sitting between Clarkes legs facing the t.v.  Clarke began playing with her hair, it made her tired. “You are putting me to sleep and I have to leave for practice soon.”

Clarke stopped her hand movement pressing a kiss to the back of her head, “Sorry Lex. Lexa?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you go out on a date with me, an official one?” She turned her head to look at her. She could tell Clarke was nervous asking her, which just made her smile.

“I’d love to, when?”

“Today? Around six so you have enough time to get ready.”

“Sounds good, what do I wear?”

“Whatever you want it’s very low key. Just meet me at my room then?”

“Yeah.”

Lexa felt how nervous she was about later, but also excited, it wasn’t like she and Clarke hadn’t done things just them before but it was never explicitly a date. Her alarm went off telling her she had to leave for practice. She got up and went to the bathroom real quick only to return finding Clarke on her phone.

She froze at the sight, it wasn’t that she had anything to hide at all but seeing Clarke feel the need to go through her phone honestly bothered her especially because it was done behind her back. When Clarke saw her she put the phone down as if she hadn’t been caught snooping.

“I have to go, you going to hang out here a little?”

“Umm yeah, have a good practice.”

Lexa nodded and turned to walk away after grabbing her phone when Clarke pulled her back pressing a kiss to her lips quickly.

**Clarkes POV**

She knows Lexa saw her with her phone, she sucks at sneaking but she needed to do it anyway.

She picked up her own phone and dialed the number, she had been repeating over and over again in her head.

“Hello?”

“Raven?”

“Yeah, who is this?"

“It’s Clarke, I stole your number from Lexas phone, I want to plan something special for tonight and was hoping you would help.”

“What’s the special occasion?”

“I want to tell her I love her.”

“How stereotypically gay of you falling in love so fast. But I will definitely help you Griffin, Lexa deserves the best and you seem to be making her happy.”

She rolled her eyes but couldn’t help the smile that came to her face at knowing she made Lexa happy, she just knew she wanted to continue doing it.

“I’m at Lexas meet me here?”

“Yeah, be there in twenty.”

Clarke took out a sketch book and began doodling while she waited, before she even knew it there was a knock coming from the apartment door, she moved to let Raven in.

“Alright what do you want to do?”

“I don’t know that’s what I need help with. Name some of Lexas favorite things.”

“Netflix, Lacrosse, Candles, Chinese food. That damn show.”

“Raven, I want more than just netflix and chill!”

“That’s what she likes Clarke, shes really simple.”

“What if I take her out for Chinese tonight?”

“She rather eat in.”

She could feel her frustration growing. She covered her face with her hands and took in a deep breathe.

“Okay candles, I can work with candles, and ordering in food, that could be romantic right?”

Raven nodded her head enthusiastically.

She was trying to concentrate on what could be romantic, it hit her.

“Raven do you have a projector?”

Raven looked confused for a moment, but shook her head no. Clarke frowned.

“But I know where to get one.” Clarke jumped and hugged her.

“Hey, I don‘t go that way but I’m totally flattered!” She pushed her away and stuck up her middle finger making Raven laugh loudly.

“I can’t figure out how you and Lexa are friends.”

“Get used to it, I’m not going anywhere. And by the way if you hurt her, I will hurt you. Do you understand me?”

Clarkes eyes widened at the threat, and she could tell that Raven really meant it, she could see the strength in her eyes. It reminded her of Lexa. She knew why they were friends now, two strong women, they probably couldn’t help it.

“Yeah, I get it Rey.” Raven nodded not averting her eyes driving her point home.

“Alright,” She stood up, “Where do you want me to bring the projector to?”

Clarke stood up too grabbing her stuff, “My room as soon as possible.”

**********

It had taken the better part of next couple of hours just to clean her and Octavias room, She threw herself on her bed in frustration, looking around at the now spotless room. She had even cleared one of the walls so she could project Lexas favorite show there.

She laid blankets down on the floor and one draping from her bed to Octavias, creating a kind of tent/fort for them to lay in comfortably, hopefully Lexa would be open to spending the night there now.

She grabbed the bag of candles and began spreading them around her room, if an RA showed up she was going to be in so much trouble. She shrugged she should be good as long as it didn’t cause an accidental fire.

She had already called and ordered the Chinese food Lexa would be there any moment, but Raven still hadn’t shown up. She pulled out her phone to text her.

Clarke: Where are you?”

Raven: Be there soon, Wick needed some convincing to let me borrow it ;)

Clarke: Ew just hurry up.

Clarke: Please.

Raven: Nice add on.

She rolled her eyes.

Lexa: Walking up the stairs.

Son of a bitch. Clarke ran around lighting all of the candles as fast as she could. She turned the lights off and opened the door, stepping out as quickly as possible so Lexa wouldn’t see into the room.

She could see Lexa trying to peek behind her.

“Hey beautiful. So um change of plans we are staying in my room I have something planned but I’m waiting on one more thing, so I’m stalling.” She gave Lexa her biggest smile, but she just looked skeptical.

“What are we waitig for exactly?”

“Ravens bringing something for me.”

Lexa raised an eyebrow at her before sitting herself down on the ground. “How did you get Raven involved?”

“Took her number out of your phone earlier.”

Lexa smiled at her then, Clarke sat so they were sitting next to each other.

“Who is Wick by the way?”

“Ugh trust me, you do not want to know anything about Wick when it comes to Raven, he is a nice guy though.”

She laughed and moved so she was facing Lexa.

“How was practice?”

Lexa leaned forward so her head was laying on Clarkes shoulder. “Exhausting, I am so tired babe.”

“Not too tired I hope.” She could feel herself pouting, she wanted Lexa as excited as she was.

Lexa lifted her head and smiled at her, “As long as sex is involved I am definitely not too tired.” She ended it with a wink which was the funniest thing she had ever seen. She burst out laughing at her girlfriends corniness.

Lexa pouted and crossed her arms looking way too adorable. Clarke couldn’t help but press a kiss to her lips before leaning their foreheads together. She heard footsteps approaching she hoped it was Raven.

She looked up and her heart stopped, Lexa must have sensed the change because she looked up a moment later and tensed.

“Just the two girls I was hoping to bump into. Did you miss me princess?”

Clarke stood and Lexa followed right after, Clarke couldn’t help but stand protectively in front of her, she glanced behind her to see Lexa looking at Finn like she was going to kill him. She caught her eyes for a moment.

“I’m sorry Lexa.” She got a confused face from her before she turned around to face Finn again.

“Finn, please just go, don’t do this.”

She felt Lexa push her out of her way so she was standing between the both of them looking back and forth.

“You two know each other? How?”

“Princess you didn’t tell her about me? I’m honestly hurt, I thought our relationship meant more to you than that.”

Clarke pulled her eyes from Finn to Lexa, she wished she would have never done that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo no more Lexa in The 100 and FTWD is on break for three months. What are we going to do without ADC for that long!? :(


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soooo this is what you have been waiting for and I'm excited to give it to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't make you guys wait :-* Hope you enjoy.

“I’m sorry Lexa.” She couldn’t understand why Clarke was apologizing, if anything she should apologize for Finn interrupting them in the first place. She really hated his guts. Clarke turned away to look at Finn again, Lexas eyes followed noticing the smirk his face held.

Why had Clarke moved herself between them in the first place?

“Finn, please just go, don’t do this.”

Wait hold on Clarke knew him. How? She pushed Clarke to the side so she could stand between the two now. She looked from Clarke to Finn, Clarkes face held fear, she looked like she was ready to cry at any moment, while Finn looked like it was his fucking birthday.

“You two know each other? How?”

She was looking at Clarke for an answer, but she wouldn’t look at her, she felt her stomach drop. What was happening?

“Princess you didn’t tell her about me? I’m honestly hurt, I thought our relationship meant more to you than that.”

Lex felt as if she had just got punched in the gut. She instinctively wrapped her arms around her mid-section. Clarke was looking at her waiting for a reaction, Lexa could do nothing but shake her head.

“You have been cheating on me?”

Clarke took a tentative step towards her and she stepped back bringing herself closer to Finn.

“I didn’t cheat on you, I would never, please hear me out babe.”

Lexa shook her head, and turned so she was facing Finn, she wanted to hit him, but she needed to know more first now.

“Explain.”

She had to hold her own hands down to stop from slapping that fucking grin off of his face.

“Lexa please let me explain, just come inside.” She felt Clarke grab her arm and try to pull her back away from him.

She snatched her arm away from Clarke, spinning on her, “don’t touch me!” Clarkes eyes widened but she took a step back releasing her. She took a deep breath in before turning back to Finn and nodding.

“Well as far as I know she didn’t cheat on you, but hell it wouldn’t be out of character for her.”

“Fuck you Finn!” Lexa ignored Clarkes outburst, until she saw Finns face change into something else entirely. He took a couple of steps towards Clarke but she stepped into his way still trying to fully comprehend what was happening. Her insticts told her not to let him near Clarke.

He looked down at her and his smirk returned.

“She is pretty easy, you know that by now and you know how good she is, so can you blame me for leaving Raven for her?”

It clicked. The blonde that Raven told her about way back at that party was Clarke, Raven never got a good enough look to recognize her. The girl that broke her best friend. She turned facing Clarke, how?

“You lied to me.”

“I didn’t lie Lex, I was too scared to tell you guys.”

Before Lexa could say anything else she felt herself being swung around and slammed into the closest wall, her head banged so hard she saw stars for a moment. It was as if the world had gone silent. She couldn’t register what just happened until she felt something cold pressed against her throat.

She opened her eyes when she felt the breath on her face to see Finn pressing her against the wall a switch blade held to her throat. That’s when it hit her, Finn was the abusive ex, he hurt Clarke, she looked over his shoulder to see tears running down Clarkes face and her screaming.

She had to concentrate to clear her head enough to understand what was being said.

“I told you I wouldn’t let you stand in my way, you should have listened.”

“Finn please let her go! Please!!”

“Shut up baby, I just need to take care of this and I will deal with you after.” That snapped her out of her fog, she wouldn’t let him lay a finger on her ever again.

Lexa tried to push him away from her but he was crazed, he pressed the blade in harder, she felt it cut her, and knew she was bleeding, but only a little. She knew when Clarke saw the blood because she freaked out.

One moment she was just standing there screaming and the next she was doing her best to pull him off of her. Finn couldn’t control himself he spun around and swung the hand with the knife at Clarke. As soon as he had released her she tackled him to the ground. Pinning the hand with the blade above his head.

She chanced a glance to look at Clarke and saw that she was on the floor gripping her arm where blood had begun dripping down. He had slashed her arm. That glance cost her, Finn headbutted her making her see the stars again, she didn’t loosen her grip though.

She began repeatedly slamming his hand on the ground, he held on to the knife with all his strength but after a couple more slams and a twist of his wrist it clattered to the floor. He growled at her and began trying to throw her off of him so he could grab it again.

“Clarke! Grab the fucking knife!” She saw Clarke crawl towards them and grab the knife before crawling back again.

Lexa focused back on trying to keep her dominance in this fight but her focus was lost just a moment when she heard Raven scream.

“Lexa!?” She looked up and saw Raven standing there confused as hell, it was all Finn needed, he pushed her off of him, she scrambled back trying not to let him get on top of her, she looked over to see Raven obviously trying to find a way to help her.

“Back off Raven!” She jumped to her feet at the same time Finn did. He began running the little distance between them, at the last moment before impact she darted out of the way. He growled in frustration turning around and tried to grab her again. She swung her fist as hard as she could, and couldn’t help the smile from forming on her face when she heard a crack and blood began pouring out of his nose.

“Fucking bitch!”

“Is that all you got Collins?”

She wasn’t going to let this be over so fast. She looked over at Raven and knew she would beat his ass for hurting her, she glanced at Clarke quickly taking in her still holding onto her arm. She felt a pain in her heart, who was she? But then she remembered the marks he had left on her and felt her anger increase, no one deserved to be hurt by their significant other.

She glanced back at Finn who had begun circling her like an animal, he darted and got a hit in to her stomach. Shit Lexa focus! She shook her head eyeing him trying to guess his next move. What Finn didn’t realize was he gave away what he was going to do next every time. When she saw him pull his right arm back, she ducked under it and spun landing a kick to his legs as she did making him crumble.

She could tell he was getting frustrated, good, he would make stupid mistakes. He stood up and went straight for her knocking them both to the ground. He was trying to climb on top of her, she knew she couldn’t let that happen, she punched him in the nose again. He screamed so loud it made her pause. She climbed on top of him. He began throwing his fist wildly at her and she did her best to block them while not falling off of him.

She took a chance and began punching his face over and over again. She must of hit his nose again because she heard a scream again. He stopped hitting her after that but she couldn’t stop, she was lost.

She pictured herself trying to quiet Ravens sobs after he broke her heart, she saw Clarkes face of pain when she grabbed her wrist, her lips hurt from him. She even pictured her mother on the floor begging her father to stop hitting her. Why didn’t he stop? He could have stopped but he didn’t, he killed her, and took away the only family she hated. She hated him, she wished he had been dead instead of prison.

Everything else was gone, all she could picture was her mother, the pain she must of felt, she pictured her little self curled in a bed that wasn’t hers begging for her mother to find a way back to her. She remembered all the panic attacks she had whenever she saw someone who looked like her father.

She felt arms grab her and she fought against them. She turned to see it was Raven trying to pull her off of Finn, she looked down and saw that he wasn’t moving. She scrambled off of him and wrapped her arms around her knees as she began rocking back and forth. She doesn’t know when the tears had started but she couldn’t stop them.

Raven wrapped her arms around. “Shhh Lex it’s okay, please calm down.” She looked up and saw Clarke was looking Finn over.

Through her sobs she was able to ask, “Is he alive?” Clarke nodded as she began trying to wake him. Lexa sighed in relief. She looked to Raven was watching her.

“He hurt you, he hurt Clarke, I couldn’t stop Raven, I couldn’t stop. I could have killed him. I’m just like my father.” Raven pulled her in closer and she let her, she broke down. Everything turned a little murky then. She couldn’t hear what was Raven was whispering to her, the words made no sense but they comforted her all the same.

“What happened Clarke what was he doing here?”

**Clarkes POV**

“I couldn’t stop, I could have killed him I’m just like my father.” Raven was holding Lexa as she fell apart, all she wanted was to be the one holding her, but she knew in her gut that she wouldn’t be welcomed. And in a moment when Raven found out even less.

“What happened Clarke what was he doing here?” She raised her finger up as she brought out her phone and called the police, she wouldn’t give him the opportunity to hurt anyone she cared about again.

When she hung up the phone she looked to see that Finn was still sleeping, well sort of, whatever this was called. The bleeding in her arm had slowed down, she took her sweater off her hips and pressed it to the cut in attempt to make it stop completely.

She moved to sit next to Raven and Lexa, but the moment she sat Lexa looked up with swollen eyes and gave her the most terrifying look, she couldn’t help but scoot back away from them.

“Okay you two need to talk, what the hell happened here?”

“Yeah Clarke explain to Raven what happened and why!”  Clarke flinched, she could feel the anger in her voice. She just shook her head as tears began to slide down her face.

“Clarke? I know you have been through a lot right now, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know he was this bad, I haven’t spoken to him in months.”

“Raven!! Don’t you fucking apologize to her!”

Ravens eyes widened as she glanced back and forth between them.

“Lexa please, just let me explain it to you.” She was full on sobbing, she couldn’t help it. Lexa stood up and walked to stand in front of her but shook her head and walked to the other side of the hall.

“Clarke explain to me.”

She forced herself to calm down enough to talk looking at Raven watch her with a worried expression.

“I’m sorry Raven, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen it’s all my fault.”

Raven seemed to be picking up on that because the longer she took to talk the more anger entered Raven eyes.

“Finn is the guy I broke up with a few weeks back, he is the one who hasn’t left me alone and who was hurting me whenever he did see me after our break up.”

Ravens eyes widened, “It was you, you were the girl I saw him with at the party?”

Clarke nodded.

“I told you about him, I told you about everything, I trusted you and you kept this from me?” She looked across the hall at Lexa who was watching them. “You kept this from both of us?” Lexa nodded.

“Yes, I know I shouldn’t have.” She didn’t get to finish because before she could say anything else Raven had slapped her across the face. She was shocked, and couldn’t move, Raven looked like she was going to hit her again but Lexa grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back as she yelled. Clarke jumped to her feet as Lexa dragged Raven away and to hers.

“You son of a bitch we trusted you! Lexa could have gotten hurt! I could have lost her because of your secrets!”

“Raven calm down please.” Lexa was trying to calm her, Clarke deserved whatever Raven had to throw at her she was right.

“No!! You left Costia for her Lex!” Raven focused back in on her. “Is that your thing Clarke people in relationships? It would explain a lot!”

She couldn’t let Lexa believe that it wasn’t true. She hadn’t known, she really hadn’t until they were over. She thought back to how she acted when she knew Lexa had a girlfriend, everything she did that Raven saw right through. Ofcourse she would see it that way.

“No!!! I didn’t know he was with you Raven I swear! Lexa it wasn’t like that I swear.”

“Don’t talk to me!”

“Lexa please….. I love you.”

Lexas eyes watered, Clarke could see the moisture building and she went to take a step towards her but Lexa stepped back pulling Raven with her.

“If you loved me you would have told me, you would have told us. I don’t know what this was to you Clarke but whatever it is it’s over.”

Clarke felt like the world had dropped from beneath her feet and she was free falling. Lexa was giving up on her, she was just going to leave her. She couldn’t let her, she shook her head no over and over again.

“Lexa please don’t do this.”

“I will tell the police what happened, he will get put away, you won’t have to worry about him anymore, but after that I want nothing to do with you. You knew he would come after me and you didn’t tell me, you put me in danger.”

Clarke couldn’t do it her knees dropped from beneath her and she was on the ground again. She felt her heart tearing into a million pieces. Her love, her best friend was going to walk away from her. She couldn’t do this, what had she done? She ruined it, she ruined everything.

The elevator doors opened and she looked to see the police eyeing Finn who had just began to sit up. Lexa watched her crying for a moment but then walked over to the police explaining everything that had happened.

Clarke watched her talk, one officer went and handcuffed Finn before he could do anything crazy, he was sitting there watching her from his place on the ground. No expression on his face. She looked up and stood when the officer that had been talking to Lexa came over to talk to her. She explained everything to him and he just nodded writing it down. Then he went on to talk to Raven.

Lexa leaned against the wall looking at her hands, they were covered in Finns blood. She was trying to wipe it off to no avail. Clarke turned and walked into her room grabbing a towel and wetting it before heading back out.

She walked straight to Lexa who was glaring at her and seemed to be daring her to take another step forward. She knew not too, instead she reached the hand with towel out towards her, Lexa looked at it a moment longer before snatching it and using it to wipe her hands off.

Clarke could see that Lexa was rubbing way too hard, even after the blood was gone she wiped harder and harder until her own hands were red and looked rubbed raw, only then did she hold the towel up for her to take back. Clarke took it and stood in front of her.

“Lexa.”

“No! I mean it, don’t you dare.” She didn’t have a response, no matter what she said in this moment she would lose. So she just nodded and took a step back as Raven walked towards them.

“They said he is being arrested.” Lexa nodded, Clarke glanced over as they began walking Finn to the elevator. Raven moved to hold onto Lexas arm, “Can we leave now?”

 Lexa nodded again and made eye contact with her. She shook her head and began walking towards the stairs.

Clarke waited until she could no longer hear their footsteps before walking into her room. She walked all around and began blowing all of the candles out. She looked around at everything and felt the ache in her heart.

There was a knock on her door, she ran to it as fast as she could hoping it was Lexa, praying that she came back willing to listen. She pulled the door open so fast she scared the man standing there.

“Chinese? I have been calling you for the past fifteen minutes.” He glanced at her arm which realized she still hadn’t cleaned up. She grabbed money and gave it to him taking the food and closing the door in his face. She pressed her back against the door and looked at the room in front of her.

How was her night ending this way? She screamed and threw the food across the room, she moved to all the blankets and began throwing some around the room, the ones that were thin enough she began tearing into pieces. When she was too tired to continue she dropped to floor tears rolling down her face. How could she possibly have any more left? She wasn’t sure how long she stood on the floor like that, but that she was still there when Octavia came home with her own tears running down her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo Clarkes screwed. Poor baby Lexa thinks she is like her dad now :( but she isn't. Raven is pissed the fuck off! Bye bye Finn! And umm Octavia whats wrong?  
> What did you guys think? Was the fight everything you wanted or did I fail miserably?


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How is Lexa dealing with this? Lincoln and Octavia. Raven confronts Clarke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this all today!! I'm exhausted!

**Lexas POV**

They walked back to her room in silence. She couldn’t find the strength to speak, she was emotionally done, wanted nothing to do with anything or anyone. She could feel Ravens gaze on her most of the time but she ignored it.

She opened the door to her room letting Raven in, she couldn’t look around without something that made her think of Clarke. She couldn’t handle that right now.

“I’m going to shower.”

She didn’t wait for a response, just walking back out of the room and into the bathroom, she closed the door behind her and turned the shower on, stripping every piece of clothing off.

Lexa felt numb, she stood there just outside the shower, willing herself to go in. Such a simple task of walking a couple of feet forward seemed impossible.

After a couple of minutes she stepped forward entering the shower. The moment the water hit her body, every emotion slammed into her at once. Anger, betrayal, confusion, but most of all pain.

She couldn’t do this, she pressed her body against the shower wall to hold herself up. Her mind couldn’t block out anything that had just happened, she replayed it over and over again. She saw Clarkes face as the truth was revealed, how could she have kept that from her? How could she smile and laugh with her, how could she claim to love her?

Lexa couldn’t comprehend how Clarke could think she loved her and have done this to her. Lexa knew what love was, love was what she had felt whenever she looked or touched Clarke, it was in her intense need to keep her safe. But now it was just tainted, it was dirty, she felt dirty.

What if Raven was right? What if Clarke had only wanted her because she saw her as a challenge because she had a girlfriend? Had she played right into her hands?

She shook her head she couldn’t believe that, Clarke had to have cared for her atleast a little right? She thought Clarkes love for her was the purest love she had ever seen or would ever feel. She constantly felt her gaze on her, she made her feel beautiful, she made her feel wanted, it couldn’t have all been fake? But where could she draw the line?

She knew she was crying, but the water going down her face helped her pretend that she wasn’t. Her mind was fucking with her and she couldn’t stop it even if she tried.

“ _I’ve never seen eyes like yours before.”_

The first time Clarke made her heart skip a beat, it came out of nowhere and she hadn’t been expecting her to say anything like that.

_“Stop staring Clarke.”_

It wasn’t the first time she felt Clarkes eyes on her but it was the first time it had an effect on her.

_“You can touch me Lexa.”_

Clarke had meant it innocently back then, but it had embarrassed both of them. But what if it wasn’t as innocent as she had thought then?

_Clarke picked up Lexas hand and was running her finger along Lexas palm lines, it gave Lexa goosebumps._

_“I don’t know just keep talking until I fall asleep, your voice is soothing.”_

_“Stay safe in your room, I don’t want anything to happen to you…. I don’t know what I would do.”_

_“I have to go home Costia, she needs me.”_

_“Oh…. You met someone?”_

The first time she ever felt jealousy for her.

_Clarke bit her lip and winced again. Lexa ran her finger along the blonde’s jaw who closed her eyes when Lexas fingers came in contact with her skin._

The first time she ever wanted to kiss her.

Lexa snapped out of her memories at the sound of a knock on the door and the sound of it opening, she was gasping for air and hadn’t even noticed it.  She was sitting on the floor of the shower too with her arms wrapped around her legs.

“Lexa?” Raven must have heard her breathing because she pulled the curtain back turning the water off, she had a towel held out for her to step into. “Get up, come to your bed please.” Raven closed her eyes, and Lexa stood turning her back to the towel and Raven wrapped her in it before opening her eyes again.

Lexa walked into the room to find Lincoln sitting on her bed, she turned and glared at Raven who rolled her eyes.

“He’s your brother don’t act like you don’t want him here.” She couldn’t deny that seeing him calmed her, her breathing had already began sounding more normal.

“I need to get dressed.” Lincoln nodded standing up and walking out of the room followed by Raven. She took a deep breathe in going to her drawers. Her pajamas were mixed with items of hers and Clarkes, she felt a pang of pain in her heart with the sight.

She grabbed her clothes and slammed the drawer shut in frustration, she didn’t want to be weak. She got dressed and went to open the door, they were both just standing there watching her.

She walked over to bed and laid down in the middle. They followed her and laid down too. One on each side of her. They laid like that for a couple of minutes no one saying anything. Lexa glanced over and saw Raven was running her fingers along the wall.

“I’m sorry Raven.”

Raven looked at her with a frown, taking her hand that was on the wall and finding Lexas hand next to her, she squeezed it reassuringly.

“You have nothing to be sorry for Lex, you didn’t know…. Umm I’m sorry I slapped her by the way, well not really but I know you probably didn’t like it. It made me feel a lot better though.”

Lexas eyebrows furrowed, seeing Raven slap Clarke had taken her by surprise and she didn’t like that it happened but she couldn’t blame Raven for having that kind of reaction, and Clarke seemed fine after it. She shrugged her shoulders. “Just don’t do it again.”

She turned to Lincoln and watched as a tear slid down his face. “Lincoln?”

He sighed frustrated and rubbed the tear away. He turned and looked at her lifting her chin so he could look at the slight cut on her throat. “You could have been really hurt Lex.”

“I’m okay little brother.” He just shook his head and looked away from her.

“Octavia knew, I asked her when Raven called, she knew the whole time, ever since that first day the four of us went out.”

Lexa gasped, she felt like she had been hit again. Clarke knew, she knew for so fucking long and she kept it from her the whole damn time.  She felt the betrayal stronger now.

“I kicked her out of my place and came straight here. I don’t know what I’m going to do about her. She fucked up Lexa, I know that, my fucking sister got hurt because of that damn secret. But I love her. I’m so sorry, I’m weak.”

She watched him as the tears began to fall down his cheeks. She sat up and wiped them from his face pulling him into a sitting position before wrapping her arms around his neck in a hug.

“Don’t feel sorry for loving her, it wasn’t her secret to tell. Clarke…” She felt another wave of pain at saying her name. “Clarke probably told her not to say anything. Don’t blame her. You aren’t weak.”

Lincoln nodded as they hugged. Lexa pulled back and went back to laying down. She was tired.

“What is going to happen to you and Clarke?” Her eyes snapped open quickly she turned to look at Lincoln.

“I broke up with her, we are done, she hurt my best friend and me.”

Raven sat up quickly. “She fucked up Lex trust me I know, but don’t break up with her because of me. Seriously don’t use me as a factor.”

Lexa rolled her eyes before closing them. “I’m tired….. Can you guys stay?”

“We weren’t going anywhere.” Lexa nodded and rolled onto her side grabbing Lincolns arm and pressing her forehead to it. She felt Raven shift behind her and felt her press her head between her shoulder blades. She didn’t know what she would do without these two, they were always there when she needed them.

**Clarkes POV**

After Octavia got home she explained what happened they didn’t speak after, they just cleaned up the mess she had made and went to bed neither saying a word, both crying themselves to sleep.

Clarke woke to a knock on the door, her and Octavia looked at each other with hopeful eyes. Clarke jumped and pulled the door open only to find Lincoln stand there. She couldn’t help but let her face fall.

“Lexa?”

He just shook his head at her looking behind her to look at Octavia, “You both messed up bad really bad.” He looked back at her, “It is not my place to forgive you and I can’t even tell you that my sister ever will either.” Her eyes began to water again but she understood what he was saying.

“Octavia can we talk over lunch?”

Octavia jumped at the offer throwing on sweatpants and sneakers before walking to the door and pressing a kiss to Clarkes cheek.

Lincoln glanced back at her before walking away.

“Goodbye Clarke.”

She closed the door behind them, the tears falling down her face once again. She grabbed her phone and saw that there was no message. She needed to talk to Lexa to explain in person.

Clarke: Can we please talk?

She put her phone down and opened her computer turning netflix on, she clicked the show she knew Lexa loved more than anything and began watching it. Before she knew it she had finished the first season and had begun falling asleep.

She checked her phone one last time and saw that Lexa never texted her back.

Clarke: I love you and won’t give up on us.

**Monday Morning**

She got to class almost twenty minutes early, Lexa wouldn’t be able to avoid her here and she was going to take full advantage of that! She tried to make it look like she hadn’t spent her weekend in bed crying over her, but who was she kidding, she totally had.

Once professor Kane walked in and the class began filling she began to worry, Lexa wouldn’t skip class. She prided herself on her attendance, she was dying from a cold last week and still sat there sniffling the whole damn time.

When professor Kane began his lecture he glanced over to her and the empty seat next to her. She wanted to walk out right then and there. But she needed these notes and maybe she could use them as an excuse to get Lexa to see or talk to her. School was her first priority, she wouldn’t let what was going on between them ruin that.

Before leaving class she took out her phone to text her.

Clarke: I have the notes, I can give them to you if you want.

She sighed putting her phone away before heading out, putting her head phones in for her walk back to her room pressing play.

_No oxygen, could barely breathe_

_My darkest sin, you've raised release_

_And it's all because of you, all because of you_

_I don't know what it is, but you've pulled me in_

_No one compares, could ever begin_

_To love me like you do_

_Hmm I wouldn't want them to_

She was so into the song that she jumped when she felt someone grab her arm, she jumped again when she realized who it was. She took her headphones out.

“Raven?”

“I have been calling you since you left the damn classroom!”

“Sorry, umm was listening to music.”

 She just nodded and glared at her. Clarke just stood there waiting for her to say something, to hit her again, maybe yell a bit, she would take whatever it was.

“You look like shit Griffin.” That kind of took her by surprise, she couldn’t help the eye roll.

“Thanks Raven.” Raven just shrugged.

“I’m starving lets go talk over breakfast.” Clarke was speechless, she didn’t know what the hell was happening, last time she saw Raven was horrible. She didn’t move forward.

“Are you coming or not?”

“Why?”

“You are obviously doing horrible over this break up, and Lexa is too. So you are going to explain your side of things to me, and maybe I can help you win Lexa back.”

Clarkes eyes widened, Raven was willing to help her. She wouldn’t give this opportunity up. She began following her towards the cafeteria.

When they got there Raven went straight for the food, Clarke was too nervous to eat, she probably had this one shot to prove to Raven that she would do anything to get Lexa back, she filled her plate anyway and followed Raven to a table.

“Okay, I’m listening, start from the beginning where and when did you met Finn and then go on until today.”

Clarke took a deep breathe in trying to gather her thoughts before speaking.

“Okay there was a party Octavia dragged me to about five months ago, I was drunk and a guy Finn came up to me started flirting saying all of the right things, he was cute and seemed really nice. We had sex in the bathroom at the party. He asked for my number and I gave it to him, I didn’t really think he was going to call me but he did.”

She paused and watched Raven for any reaction but she was just watching her and eating her oatmeal. She nodded for her to continue so she did.

“At the beginning it was really fun and great he was the kind of guy any girl would have wanted, but the longer we were together the less I felt, I knew I should feel more for him but I just didn’t. I just didn’t want to be alone. I found out about you at the party I met Lexa at. I was dancing and Finn went to get a drink he was gone awhile and I couldn’t find him. I looked all around, I went to check the hallways when I heard you guys fighting and got the jist of what was going on, he cheated on you with me, and then on both of us for the first two months we were together he was still with you. I needed a moment so I went to the bedrooms I was leaning on the door trying to figure out what to do when Lexa opened the door and I fell.”

She thought about what she had said and burst out laughing, she laughed so hard tears began rolling down her face, but then the laughing stopped and the tears kept coming. She coved her face with her hands trying to stop the tears.

“Clarke?”

“Our first real interaction was me falling for her Raven, how fucked was I from the beginning?”

She removed her hands to see Raven just observing her break down. She sighed and readied herself to talk again.

“I saw you when you came back in the apartment. I didn’t know what to do. I decided to stay with him, I don’t know why I just didn’t want to be alone. Then I saw Lexa inn class, he used to pick me up from it all the time, he recognized her but wouldn’t give anything away. I wanted so bad for him to slip up, but he never did. I started falling in love with Lexa from the beginning though she was amazing. I used to complain about her to him and then flip out when he agreed with me. But the day I met youand we had breakfast I knew I was done with him, I was able to recognize that my feelings for her were way stronger than what I had ever felt for him.”

She paused and drank a cup of water, before continuing. “I really liked you too and thought he was seriously stupid for letting you go. I brought you up to see if he would admit anything, he didn’t. I wanted nothing to do with him anymore. I broke up with him then, it was the first time he ever put his hands on me.”

She looked down and noticed she was shaking her leg, she put her hand on her leg to stop herself giving a small smile because she wished Lexa was there to yell at her. “I was scared to tell Lexa, even from the beginning, I told Octavia not to say anything to her or Lincoln while I figured out what to do about him. When Lexa found out he hurt me, she took care of me, you too. When you told me about your story with him I froze, I was terrified of losing Lexa and I didn’t want you to hate me too so I said nothing. That was a huge mistake I see that now and I’m sorry Raven.”

Raven nodded at her and took her hand in hers and squeezed her reassuringly before quickly letting go. “Go on.” Clarke nodded.

“I knew Lexa had Costia, and I would never have tried to do anything with her while they were together. I did my best to control myself but Raven I wanted her so bad, everyone could see through me. I knew she wasn’t really the kind of person who acted so touchy with their friends but she let me and it was amazing. I would take whatever she would give me. Then the she went to see Costia and Finn showed up again…He accused me of leaving him for her and I said he was right. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Obviously, your psycho ex is flipping out and you basically put an X on her back Clarke!”

“I know that now but I didn’t then. That was the last time I saw him before Friday, he had even stopped messaging I thought he was done with me. Then Lexa and Costia broke up, and it was my chance to be with her so I took it, I will never regret that. I love her Raven, I think she is the love of my life, I just need to prove that to her.”

Raven sat back and watched her for a while. Her nerves were driving her crazy.

“I believe you. I think you are an idiot for keeping it from us but I believe you. But Clarke this isn’t just about you keeping secrets anymore. Do you know about Lexas dad?”

She nodded her head and remembered Lexa saying that she was just like him after beating Finn up.

“With Finn she lost it Clarke, she zoned out, she has never done that before, never reached that level of angry. She thinks if I didn’t stop her she would have killed him. I think she’s wrong but she won’t listen to me. Her protectiveness of me and you pushed her there. She isn’t just upset with you she is questioning who she is now, and I can’t stand to see that. That’s why I came to you. I think you can help her.”

“I will do anything for her Raven, but how? She won’t answer any of my messages.”

“I’m thinking we ambush her. What do you say? Want to go to Lexas room Clarke? I told her I’d be right back, she is expecting me any minute now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So 2-3 chapters left loves! The last one will be an epilogue, I hope you have enjoyed reading as much as I have enjoyed writing <3


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They talk, maybe figure some things out?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so confused about how to feel with the story coming to an end!! Hope you enjoy the chapter :)

**Clarkes POV**

“I’m thinking we ambush her. What do you say? Want to go to Lexas room Clarke? I told her I’d be right back, she is expecting me any minute now.”

Her eyes widened, that was a joke right? She couldn’t be serious? But then Raven stood and began walking towards the exit. She scrambled up and ran to catch up to her.

“Wait you’re serious?!”

Raven didn’t slow down, “You just said you loved her.”

“I do love her, are you sure she doesn’t need more time away from me?”

Raven stopped walking and turned to her, “honestly I don’t know what she needs but I know she let you in and really cares for you, she is at her happiest when with you. I just want her to be happy.”

Clarke thought about it a moment and nodded, this went beyond just what she had done now and if Lexa needed her she would be there. “Lets go.”

The walk seemed to take forever, she kept going over what she was going to say to Lexa in her head, that is if Lexa actually let her talk. She hoped she would, she really did.

The closer they got to Lexas apartment the more nervous she felt. They got to the door, and Clarke was sure the moment they knocked and Lexa saw her the door would slam shut. Her eyes widened when she saw Raven take out Lexas keys. There was no going back.

Raven opened the door and she followed her in, Lexas room door was open, when they got to it the room was empty. That’s when Clarke heard the shower was on, she turned to Raven to ask if they should just come back when she went and knocked on the bathroom door.

“You said you were getting in the shower as soon as I fucking left! Tell me you haven’t been in there the whole time.”

Raven hit the door harder at the silence.

“Go away!”

Clarke stepped towards the door but Raven put her hand up to stop her, but Clarke ignored her. Lexa had begun leaving the bathroom door unlocked since they had gotten together. She hoped she had left it unlocked now out of habit.

When she grabbed the door knob and it turned Ravens eyes widened. She glanced between the door and Clarke, she motioned for her to go in, and pointed to herself and then the bedroom. Clarke nodded.

Raven closed the bedroom door behind herself, and it sounded like she locked it behind herself. Clarke shook her head knowing that was Raven way of trapping Lexa.

She took a deep breathe in, knocked on the door once more before opening it and stepping in closing it quickly behind herself.

“Seriously Raven, I regret being your friend so much right now. Get the hell out, I just want to be alone for fucks sake!!” Clarke hovered near the door unsure of what to do. Lexa was going to kick her ass, she was sure of it.

She sat on the toilet not saying a word, then she remembered keeping her mouth shut was one of the problems here. She took another deep breathe again.

“It’s not Raven.”

Clarke was ready for there to be yelling for something to be thrown at her but none of it came. The silence scared her more than anything else would have.

“Lexa?” She wanted to go to her, to pull the curtain back and just go in like nothing wrong had happened between them.

“Why are you here?”

“Raven came to me after class, told me you needed me, well you might need me so… I’m here. You may hate me right now but I won’t let that stop me from being here for you.”

“She had no fucking right.” Clarke flinched at that.

“She wants to make sure you are okay is all.”

“I’m fine.”

“Lexa can you get out the shower so we can talk face to face?”

There was a silence after that, she seemed to be ignoring her.

“Pass me my damn towel.”

Clarke stood and grabbed the towel walking towards the curtain, the shower turned off and Lexas hand popped out. She gave it to her and went back to sitting.

When Lexa opened the curtain she was looking down towel wrapped around herself wringing her hair out.

“You can leave now, I don’t want to talk to you.”

Lexa still hadn’t looked up but began stepping towards the door, Clarke jumped up and stood in front of the door locking it. Lexa looked at her then and what Clarke saw broke her heart, Lexa looked like she had been crying for hours, her eyes were red and swollen and held so much sadness, more than she knew anyones could hold.

It was her instinct to comfort her so she stepped forward raising her hand to Lexas face but before she could touch Lexa stepped back shaking her head, tears forming in her eyes. “Don’t.”

She tried to ignore her and took another step forward but Lexa put her hand up and shook her head. “Please Clarke, I can’t, don’t touch me.”

She pulled her hand back instantly, she felt her own eyes begin to water, how could she have let this happen? She broke the woman she loved.

**Lexas POV**

She couldn’t do this, she didn’t want to see Clarke, she wasn’t strong enough to face her and not fall right back into her arms. She didn’t want to need her, to want her, to love her. Yet the moment she heard her voice relief had flooded her entire body.

She couldn’t be weak. She made sure not to touch Clarkes hand when she grabbed the towel. She was trying to calm herself down before stepping out. She remembered how her face looked before stepping into the shower and couldn’t imagine what it looked like since she had spent the time in there crying again.

“You can leave now, I don’t want to talk to you.”

When she stepped out she kept her face towards the ground she started walking towards the door but looked up and she heard Clarke locking the door. Her first thought was she hoped Clarke knew that her locking the door did nothing considering the lock was on this side of the door. Then she saw Clarke take in the way she looked.

She felt vulnerable and she hated it, it felt wrong. When Clarke began walking towards her to touch her she couldn’t help but step back. If Clarke touched her she would fall apart instantly, she felt it happening already.

“Don’t.”

Clarke ignored her and went to try and touch her, “Please Clarke, I can’t, don’t touch me.” Clarke pulled her hand away, Lexa took the moment to look her over, she looked like she was struggling to keep it together herself, and though her entire body screamed for her to pull Clarke to her she fought it with all her strength.

“You should leave.”

Clarke shook her head and glanced at the door behind her. “Raven locked herself in your room and I’m pretty sure she won’t let you in unless you hear me out. I won’t leave until you do.”

She couldn’t believe the audacity of either girl. They had no right to tell her what she had to do.

She walked to Clarke and did her best to glare at her, she wasn’t sure she managed it. “We will see about that, move out of my way.” Clarke nodded and moved to the side. Lexa opened the door and walked to her room, she tried to open it but it was indeed locked. This mother fucker locked her out of her own room.

“Raven open the fucking door this isn’t funny.” She began banging on it. She stopped when she heard footsteps.

“Nope, I forgave her and she literally slept with my boyfriend, now it’s your turn. You love her, I won’t let you push her away without giving her a chance.”

Lexas eyes widened at what Raven had said. She had no right to say that Lexa loved Clarke even if it was true. She went to yell something back when her speaker was turned on to what sounded like full blast. She banged on the door a couple of more times before stomping past Clarke back into the bathroom.

She sat herself on the toilet, she cursed herself for forgetting to lock the door behind herself again when Clarke stepped through the door and sat against the wall across from her.

Neither said anything for awhile, Lexa was counting in her head she didn’t want to freak out, she was scared of what she was capable of now. She wasn’t as in control as she had thought she was all these years.

“So you do love me?”

Her head snapped up to look at Clarke. “What!?”

“Raven said you loved me and you didn’t deny it.” Clarke shrugged at her. She could see the hope in Clarkes eyes, she wanted to snuff it out, but she couldn’t be a liar.

“Love is weakness.”

“You can’t believe that Lex. My love for you has made me stronger.” Lexa rolled her eyes at that.

“You don’t love me.”

“You can’t tell me what I feel, just let me explain Lexa please, don’t interrupt me and let me tell you everything.”

Lexa thought about it for a moment, once Clarke finished talking she could tell Raven that she had listened and she would be able to go back to her room. She nodded her consent, fighting the smile she felt coming at Clarkes bewildered face. Control yourself Alexandria Woods, she flinched at her own name in her head, stupid name.

Clarke began talking, telling her every single thing since the day she met Finn. She couldn’t help but ask a question or throw in commentary every now and then.

“I still don’t believe you weren’t drunk.” She chided herself, it made her sound like she was teasing her. Clarke rolled her eyes at her but had a small smile on her face.

How she found out Finn was a cheater and liar. “Why didn’t you break up with him right there it doesn’t make sense?”

“I didn’t want to be alone, and I wanted to know more about him and Raven, plus he was nice to me then Lex, too nice even. I didn’t know you or Raven.”

Lexa couldn’t agree with what she was saying because she wouldn’t ever stand for cheating it was wrong, but she nodded for Clarke to go on. Which she did.

How she made Octavia promise not to say anything. “You kept it from me from the very beginning.”

“Lexa you were mean! I thought you hated me I wasn’t going to give you another reason to!”

She nodded her head, she had begun relaxing as Clarke spoke and sitting on the toilet was uncomfortable, she moved sit on the floor. “Hurry up and go on.”

How she broke up with Finn because she began having feelings for her and she realized Raven was a good person. “You liked me before Costia and I broke up?”

“Yes, but Lexa I swear I wouldn’t have crossed that line! I hated that you were with someone else but I did my best to respect it. I don’t have a thing for people in relationships contrary to what Raven has said.”

She couldn’t say anything to that, if she was honest with Clarke and herself her feelings for her began while she was with Costia. It was wrong but she couldn’t help it.

It was hard for her to hear about Finn hurting her again but she sat through it. She couldn’t help but glance at Clarkes arm that held the cut. She seemed to be okay.

She replayed the conversation she had where Raven told her her story.

“Why didn’t you just tell me and Raven your ex was Finn when Raven opened up to you? She only did it because I trusted you, which was an obvious mistake now that I look back.” She saw Clarke physically flinch at the words and regretted them immediately. She almost went to comfort her but refrained herself.

She was being weak. She pulled her legs up but she saw Clarkes eyes move up her legs and blush. Was she seriously checking her out?

Clarke shook her head, “I was scared to tell you guys, I was scared to lose you, it may have been a short amount of time of us knowing each other but you already meant so much to me…. I told Finn the last time he hurt me that I left him because I had feelings for you. I didn’t mean to but it slipped out and that’s why he went for you before. It was my fault completely.”

Tears began to fall down from Clarkes blue eyes. “Fuck Lexa he could have fucking killed you and it would have been because of me. I’m so sorry.” Clarke began full on sobbing. Lexa couldn’t stand to see her that way, it hurt more than what she had been feeling since she last time saw her.

She moved so she was sitting next to Clarke she raised her hand to comfort her but let it fall back down. She let Clarke finish crying before she asked the question on her mind. “Have you heard anything? I mean how is Finn?”

Clarke watched her then examining her face. Lexa wondered if Clarke could see the monster that she felt inside of herself.

“You are not your father Lexa.”

Her eyes widened in surprise and she dragged herself away from Clarke not looking at her.

“Lexa?” She made no move that indicated she heard her.

“Lexa you are not your father. You were protecting me and yourself, defending Raven, you did what you had to and he is fine, broken nose that’s it.”

She looked up, “just a broken nose?” Clarke nodded and she felt relief flood through her. Tears began rolling down her face again, she just couldn’t seem to help it these days. She felt Clarke move closer to her but she didn’t touch her and that she appreciated that.

They sat there for another ten minutes. Lexa was going over everything Clarke had said. She understood it but she couldn’t act like it was okay because it wasn’t. She was going over every moment between them through Clarkes point of view when Clarkes voice snapped her out of it.

“Thank you.” She was too wrapped in her own thoughts to understand what she was being thanked for.

‘What?”

“For hearing me out.”

“I didn’t have a choice in the matter.”

“You did, you could have still kicked me out and waited Raven out.”

She tilted her head to the side thinking it over. Clarke was right. She sighed out loud, weakness.

“Lexa please give me another chance, I know you still care for me I can feel it, and you know I love you even if you won’t accept it, tell me what is holding you back and I will do anything I can to fix it.”

Lexa thought about it for a moment, she loved her she really did and she did believe Clarke atleast thought she loved her too, so what was holding her back. She looked at Clarkes face and she knew, she couldn’t trust her.

If Clarke hurt her again, she wouldn’t be able to handle it, it would break her. She loved her too much. She stood up from the floor and Clarke followed.

“I’m doing what I must to survive.” Clarke took her words in a moment before responding.

“Shouldn’t life be about more than just surviving? Don’t we deserve more than that?” Lexa studied Clarke then, and just the sight of her made her feel at home, made her feel like she was where she belonged. How could one person have the power to destroy you and the power to bring you to life? It wasn’t fair.

Lexa brought her hand to Clarkes face and cupped her cheek. Just as she did the music from her room stopped playing. She glanced at the door before looking back at Clarke who had placed her own hand on top of Lexas.

“Maybe we do.” Lexa pulled her hand away and opened the bathroom door and stepped out. She turned the knob, it was unlocked. She turned to face Clarke who was watching her.

“Goodbye Clarke.” Clarkes face fell instantly, Lexa felt a pang of pain.

“Lexa what does this mean?” Lexa thought about it a moment, she had two very differnent instincts yelling at her about what to do. One was based on love, it told her to let Clarke in to forget what she had done and put it behind them. The other was based on fear, it told her to push her away, end things right now and never look back. She couldn’t do either thing.

“It means not yet.” She nodded at her and seemed to understand what she was saying. Lexa turned to her door once again.

“Will you be in class on Wednesday?”

Lex turned back to her again. “Yes.” Clarke nodded and began walking away from her.

“Wait Clarke.” Clarke turned back around with hope in her eyes, Lexa looked down feeling a little embarrassed about what she was going to say. “Can I borrow your notes?”

Clarke let out a little chuckle and began digging through her bag. She pulled out her notebook and paused picking up another book along with it, handing Lexa both. Lexa didn’t say anything about the extra book and neither did Clarke.

“Thank you.”

“Anything for you beautiful.” She couldn’t help but roll her eyes before going into her room and closing the door behind herself, she didn’t open her eyes until she hear the apartment door close. When she did open them Raven was standing in front of her.

“You out too!!” Raven raised her hands in surrender with a small smile on her face. She began walking around her to get to the door. “How can you forgive her so easily?”

Raven stopped walking and looked at her, “because you are my best friend and you love her, you need her Lexa. You were only together right now for like half an hour and you already look better, even if you didn’t really fix everything yet.”

Lexa looked at the floor, “ I don’t know if we can fix everything.”

“Do you want to?”

Lexa didn’t have to think about it, “Yes I love her…. but I don’t trust her to  not break me heart.”

“That’s what love is Lexa, putting your heart on the line even if it might get broken.”

Lexa nodded absorbing the words. “I never felt like this with Costia, does that mean I didn’t truly love her?”

Raven shook her head, “I think you just loved her a different way.”

“Okay…. Get out now.”

Raven stuck her tongue out at her before closing the door behind herself. Lexa laid herself down and picked up the books Clarke had given her. The second one seemed to be a sketch book. Her phone rang with an alert and she picked it up and looked at the message.

Clarke: I started that sketchbook right before I met you, I haven’t filled it yet, but I thought you should see it.

Lexa looked back down at the book and began flipping through the pages quickly she recognized some of the drawings as ones Clarke had sent to her. But the majority of the book was filled with drawings of herself, some just showed her features, lips, eyes, jaw. Others were moments Clarke had seen her in. Taking notes in class, sleeping, laughing, smiling, reading. They were all so beautiful they took her breathe away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Ravens pain in the ass self, she is honestly one of my favorite people to write :) Lexa needs more time guys trust is a big thing. Atleast Clarke knows she has a chance now. Let me know what you think I love your feedback, and I just wanted to thank you for taking the time to give me a chance <3


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my pain in the butt friend has been rushing me for this since I told her I started writing it. She has been my biggest support while writing this Fic. So this is for you beautiful :) Thank you :-*

**Wednesday Morning**

**Clarkes POV**

She decided to wait for Lexa outside of the classroom that morning, she missed her terribly but she didn’t want to push her. She hadn’t texted her anything since her text explaining the sketchbook, she just hoped she liked it. She isn’t sure if she had ever felt this nervous about seeing Lexa, she just wanted to earn her back.

She kept switching her weight from foot to foot looking down the hall but she didn’t see Lexa, what if she didn’t show again?

“Clarke?”

She spun around to find Lexa standing behind her, she had come from the opposite way. “You never come in this way.”

Lexa just shrugged lifting her cup, “I needed coffee and I had time so I stopped by the café.” Clarke just nodded and Lexa began walking away from her into the classroom. The room was pretty packed, but they found seats at the back of the room. Clarke just wanted to grab Lexas hand once they were settled in but she refrained herself and just watched her.

“You are staring.”

She blinked but kept looking, “You look very beautiful Lex.”

Lexa turned her head slightly to look at her and just shook her head,” Clarke don’t. Not now.”

Clarke blushed, “Sorry, I just, I miss you so much Lexa.”

Lexa ignored what she said and went back to paying attention the teacher.

Class ended pretty fast and Lexa seemed to be in a rush to get out of there but Clarke moved just as quickly catching up to her in the hall.

“Wait hold on.” Lexa stopped walking took a deep breath in and turned to her expectantly.

“I umm had a little trouble concentrating and didn’t really take notes, can I borrow your note book?” Lexa rolled her eyes but Clarke saw the little smirk on her lips as she opened her bag to grab her book, it made her heart beat faster, she missed that smile. Lexa handed her the book. “Thanks.”

Lexa nodded and began walking away, Clarke watched her walk away, Lexa paused for a moment seeming to contemplate something, she looked over her shoulder. Clarke began walking towards her but before she got really close to her Lexas words made her freeze.

“I miss you too.” Lexa didn’t give her a chance to react because by the time she was able to close her mouth from shock Lexa was gone. She just smiled to herself letting the words course through her. She had a chance.

**Thursday Afternoon**

Lexa laid on the field trying to catch her breath, Indra made their last practice of the year ten times harder than usual and she had previously thought that was impossible. She closed her eyes trying to block out the sun, it was too fucking hot.

Her eyes snapped open when there was thud next to her, she looked over to find none other than Octavia next to her, she sighed and closed her eyes again.

“Lexa?”

“Yes Blake?”

“I’m sorry about keeping the Finn thing a secret, I didn’t ever think it would have escalated to what it did.”

Lexa glanced over at her quickly trying to gauge her sincerity, she thinks she meant it. “It wasn’t your secret to tell….. I’m glad you and Lincoln are okay.”

Octavia sighed loudly, “So am I, I was so scared I lost him that night and then Clarke was mess in our room when I got there, I have never seen her like that.”

Lexa didn’t know what to say to that so she stood silent. She didn’t want to hurt Clarke she really didn’t but she couldn’t just jump back into things.

“Are you guys going to get back together?”

She felt a rush of annoyance. “Octavia, you should stop now.”

“Look she’s my friend, and she misses you, she loves you. Just don’t give up yet, give her a chance.”

Lexa didn’t say anything but she had listened, if everyone had their way she and Clarke would have been back together already. She missed her too, she just did her best to stay busy and not let it consume her. It was always hardest at night, she missed having someone to sleep next to her.

Octavia stood up then and began walking towards the locker rooms, Lexa sat up and began running her hands through the grass. She wanted to see Clarke, she sighed, she would wait until tomorrows class, she could hold off until then.

**Friday Morning**

It was her turn to wait outside of the classroom, she got there especially early to beat Clarke, she felt a weird nervousness about seeing her. She didn’t know if she was doing the right thing or not but she didn’t really care right now.

She tried to not smile when she saw her walking towards the room, the hall was a little crowded so Clarke didn’t see her right away. She was wearing shorts with a loose t-shirt and a pair of converse, she had her hair down. She looked hot. Lexa tried not to stare but she couldn’t help it.

When Clarke saw her she smiled so bright Lexa couldn’t help but smile back and offer a small wave. Clarke half jogged to her which made her stomach flip.

“You waiting for me?”

“Yes.”

Clarke smiled and opened the door ushering her in, they sat in the back again. Clarke handed Lexa her book and they waited for Kane to start. Lexa couldn’t help but glance at Clarke every now and then and Clarke caught her more than a few times making her blush and look down quickly.

“Lex are you okay?”

“You look sexy.” Her eyes widened and she looked around quickly, did that really come from her? From Clarkes hanging jaw she knew it was. God she hated herself so much in this moment. She covered her face with her palms putting both elbows on her desk.

A couple of seconds later Professor Kane began talking so she did her best to focus on that but then Clarke passed her a note.

“So you think I’m sexy?”

She glanced over but Clarke was pretending to listen to the lecture.

“It just slipped out.”

Lexa didn’t get to put the paper down before Clarke grabbed it and read.

“But is it true?”

Lexa thought about this situation a moment, flirting with Clarke probably wasn’t a good idea when she was trying to control her own feelings but damn this felt so right.

“Always.”

She held on to the note awhile before passing it to her trying to decide if it was a good idea but then Clarke snatched the paper away before she made her decision. Lexa almost jumped up to snatch it from her but it was too late.

“;) Are we meeting later to start our final papers?”

Lexa completely forgot about the papers which was so unlike her. Of course she kind of flirted with Clarke the day they would have to be alone working together.

“My place after class?”

She passed the note back to Clarke and swore she fucking squeaked with excitement before turning red and looking down. Lexa just shook her head trying not to smile.

**Clarkes POV**

The walk to Lexas room took forever and it was driving her crazy, she wanted to get there as soon as possible, Lexa was even walking too slow for her liking. When they finally reached the apartment she went straight to Lexas room throwing herself on the bed and grabbing a pillow.

“I miss this bed soo much.” She looked up and saw Lexa watching her arms crossed eyebrow raised. Clarke just realized what she did and she scrambled off the bed as fast she could.

“Sorry, umm habit, plus your bed is way better than mine.”

Lexa just gave her a little smile and sat on the bed patting next to her for Clarke to sit. Her heart started beating faster from just the thought of being on the bed with Lexa but she sat anyway. Lexa grabbed the pillow she had earlier and passed it back to her. “It is way better than yours.”

They began talking about their paper. It came so natural being with Lexa and she hoped that she just felt the same way. They settled on what they were going to do and began writing. Clarke didn’t realize how fast time was flying until her stomach growled ridiculously loud. She looked up embarrassed but Lexa just gave her that little smile again, stood up and motioned for her to follow.

Clarke went to the kitchen where Lexa began pulling things out of cupboards and fridge. “You’re cooking for me?”

“I’m hungry too, but yeah figured it would be rude not to feed you.” Clarke just smiled at her and if she wasn’t crazy then Lexa just blushed.

Lexa made them grilled cheese with tomato soup, it was Clarkes favorite, Lexa knew that. She couldn’t help but think the way Lexa was acting today meant they were going to be okay. But how could she find out?

The answer came when Lexa walked around the table and swiped her thumb across Clarkes bottom lip where she was about wipe soup off. Lexa looked her in the eyes and stuck her thumb in her mouth sucking her thumb with a pop.

“Mm delicious.” With that she winked and walk over to the sink and began cleaning. Clarke thought she was going to die, Lexa was messing with her bad. She could play that game too.

**Lexas POV**

She was horny, she was so fucking horny she was losing her mind, all she wanted was Clarke touching her, tasting her, filling her. She wet her hands in the sink and tried to focus on cleaning, that was an impossible task. She had gone months without sex why was it so difficult right now?

Clarke was Clarke and from the first moment she had touched her Lexa had been addicted to the feelings that her touch caused. She couldn’t just act like nothing had happened and jump in to bed with her, or could she?

Next thing she knew she felt the heat of a body behind her, she glanced over her shoulder to see Clarke standing behind her. “What?”

“You seem tense, let me help you.” Before she could say anything Clarke began to massage her shoulders, she tensed even more at the contct but relaxed into as Clarke continued. Clarke moved all of her hair to one shoulder but continued her movements.

She stepped forward as much as possible causing Lexas hips to hit the counter and her ass to push against Clarkes front, she held in a moan at the contact. Lexa was losing right now and she knew it.

She fought to keep her eyes open but then she felt Clarkes breath on her neck, followed by very light kiss to the spot that made her weakest, she let out a little moan, moving her head to give Clarke better access.

“Is this okay baby?” Lexas eyes snapped open and she pushed back making Clarke step back from her as well. She turned to look at Clarke and started pacing. What should she do?

“Lexa?”

“Shut it a minute will ya?” She looked at her, fuck she wanted her, but she was supposed to let her go. She was failing at that miserably. She looked at her again, damn it she loved her. She loved her with everything inside of her, seeing her smile, spending time with her today had proved it. But there had to be a but right?

“Lexa I’m sorry, I just thought, I mean you were flirting with me right?’ She was, she definitely was. She shouldn’t have but she did.

“Clarke can you go home?” She saw Clarkes eyes widen and saw the hurt flash in her eyes. Shit that came out wrong. She went to take a step towards here but Clarke just nodded tears forming in her eyes and she half ran to Lexas room. Lexa just stood there she couldn’t move, she needed to think with her mind and not her hormones and with Clarke around she only focused on her hormones.

Clarke walked just as quickly to the door glancing at Lexa as tears ran down her face, yet still she couldn’t move. She didn’t realize she was holding her breathe until the door closed behind Clarke.

She sat at the kitchen table for about ten minutes rotating a mug in her hand. What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to do? She pictured Clarkes face right before she left.

“FUCK!” She threw the mug against the wall shattering it.

**Saturday Morning**

**Clarkes POV**

Clarke had spent the rest of the day in bed, she fell asleep so early but still managed to sleep in. She rolled over pulling the blankets back over her head, she never felt this alone and empty. She thought her and Lexa were making progress but Lexas rejection was heard loud and clear.

Her mind wouldn’t let her go back to sleep. She went to grab her phone, she needed to talk to someone anyone so she could understand what to do next. She grabbed her phone but it was dead, ofcourse it was. She plugged it in and went decided to go take a shower.

She stood in the shower way longer than usual. How was she supposed to let Lexa go when she is all she ever thought about? She was always the person she wanted to spend her time with. Could she ever feel this way for anyone else?

She stepped out the shower wrapping a towel around her self. She walked to her bed and sat down. She looked around her room trying to figure out what to do. She remembered she was going to calls Wells so she grabbed her phone.

What she wasn’t expecting was all the messages that were there.

Lexa: I’m sorry I handled that wrong.

Lexa: I’m trying.

Lexa: Can you please come back?

Lexa: Clarke?

Lexa: I called your phone…

Lexa: Please.

Her last message had been around midnight. Why the fuck hadn’t she paid attention to her fucking phone? She was always on her phone! Lexa seriously probably thought she was ignoring her.

Clarke tried to call her back but there was no answer, it was ten, Lexa didn’t sleep in. She got dressed as fast as she could and headed straight for Lexas.

She knocked on the door but there was no answer. She wasn’t going to give up she must have been knocking for a good five minutes when the door finally opened.

“What the fuck blondie?” Anya looked very mad, but Clarke didn’t have time for it.

“Sorry!” She half ran to Lexas room, thankfully her door was unlocked. Clarke stepped into the dark room and was able to make out Lexas sleeping form, which confused her.

She walked towards her bending down to try and wake her up. Lexas hair almost covered her whole face, Clarke smiled she didn’t understand how she could sleep like that. She brushed the hair away taking in how beautiful Lexa looked in that moment.

“Lexa….Lex.” She began running her hand up and down Lexas arm to try and get her to wake up. She knew it was starting to work when Lexas peaceful face began looking more grumpy.

“Lexa come on its time to wake up, I came back.” There was a groan and Lexa turned onto her side facing away from Clarke.

“Come on don’t be stubborn.”

“Clarke shut up!!” Clarkes eyes widened at the outburst but then Lexa threw herself up into a sitting position so fast she actually squeaked the movement was so fast it scared her.

“Clarke!?” Clarke stood back up as Lexa stared at her with wide eyes and her mouth hanging open, she didn’t know what to do so she just waved in response.

Lexa grabbed her waving hand and pulled her down towards the bed and on top of her into the most painful hug ever, she loved it completely.

“You came back.” Clarke did her best to hug her back just as tightly. But then Lexa pushed her away and sat up ,her face turning serious.

“What took you so long?”

“My phone died yesterday, I didn’t notice until I woke up this morning.”

Lexa just nodded and stood up, walking to the bathroom without another word.

“Okay?” That was weird right? She got up and  stood there awkwardly waiting for Lexa to get back, she heard the water running. She didn’t know if she should sit or what so she just stood their awkwardly.

** Lexas POV**

She finished brushing her teeth and looked at herself in the mirror. It was now or never, she walked back into the room to see Clarke was standing. She sat on the bed and motioned for Clarke to sit, she started talking before Clarke could.

“So you love me?’ Clarke seemed confused by the question but answered anyway.

“Of course I do.” Lexa nodded trying to take it in.

“Say it Clarke.” She needed to hear it.

“I love you Lexa.” She nodded again feeling for the first time what those words truly meant, for the first time actually believing that Clarke meant them.

“Do you want to be with me? Like in a relationship again?” Clarke still looked confused.

“More than anything.” Lexa nodded her head again, looking at Clarkes confused face and smiling for the first time since she got there.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Lexas smile grew wider, she moved so she was sitting on top of Clarke facing her and straddling her lap. She moved Clarkes hair away from her face and lightly pressed her lips to Clarkes who gasped at the contact. Lexa pulled away smiling. She went to kiss her again but Clarke pulled back.

Lexa frowned at the movement.

“Wait, I need to clarify for my own sake, you’re mine again? Like my girlfriend?”

Lexa smiled feeling relieved, “I was still yours even when we weren’t together but yes you are my girlfriend… again.” She was surprised when Clarke jumped up making her fall to her back and putting her on the bottom.

“Oh thank god.” She started laughing but it was cut short when Clarke pressed her lips to hers again, this kiss wasn’t fast at all. Lexa sucked Clarkes bottom lip into her mouth and bit it causing Clarke to moan. She soothed the bite by running her tongue along it. Clarke pressed down into her more sliding her tongue into Lexas mouth who welcomed it greedily.

They fought for dominance in the kiss the entire time, Lexa didn’t want to relent, but then Clarke growled into the kiss, and she found it to be the sexiest thing ever. She could release some control if it is what got Clarke so riled up, she wanted to see what she would do.

Clarke began running one of her hands up and down Lexas side, moving it to cup a breast through her tank top, she squeezed hard making Lexa whimper in pain and pleasure. When Clarke pulled away from the kiss Lexa gasped for air she didn’t realize she needed.

But then Clarke was on her neck, kissing, sucking and biting, each and every one made her shiver beneath her, she knew Clarke was marking her but she couldn’t find it in herself to care. Clarke had never been this dominant before and it was driving her crazy.

Clarke pulled back, pulling her up with her, She grabbed the bottom of Lexas shirt and tugged it over her head so fast Lexa was sure she had whip lash. Clarke shoved her to lay back down, and Lexa was just shocked at how this was playing out and so turned on by it at the same time.

Clarke wasted no time, Lexa jumped a little she wasn’t prepared for Clarke to take a nipple into her mouth so fast, but the way her tongue swirled around it had her pulling Clarkes head in closer. She moaned as she felt teeth graze it. “Fuck Clarke.”

She thrusted her hips up trying to a find some kind of contact but Clarke refused, moving her body so that she couldn’t get what she needed most. “Clarke please.”

Clarke let her nipple go with a pop and she couldn’t help but whine at the loss. Clarke moved higher and whispered in her ear “Shhh baby I’m going to take care of you.” She pressed a kiss right below her ear making her moan again.

Clarke made her way lower and began kissing her stomach, the lower she went the more Lexa couldn’t help but jump with each pulse it sent through her entire body. She could feel her pulse in her clit, and it was going crazy, she pressed her legs together as tight as possible to try and alleviate some of her need. Clarke just shook her head prying her legs open but doing nothing to appease her need there.

She just about cheered when Clarke began moving her shorts down her legs, but then she realized Clarke left her underwear on and she was ready to cry. She was soaked, she could feel it, she was so turned on but her fucking girlfriend decided to be a tease. She paused for a moment and smiled for a moment, Clarke was her girlfriend again.

Clarke settled herself between her legs and began to pay attention to her inner thighs she kissed and licked closer and closer to where she needed her most. The anticipation was driving her crazy. She was sure the moment Clarke did touch her she would finish embarrassingly fast.

Clarkes teeth were at the edge of her underwear nibbling so close, she thrusted her hips trying to make Clarke move but she just shook her head and held her down. Then Clarke brushed her nose against her clit through her underwear and Lexa moaned so loud she knew someone probably heard her. Clarke looked up and grinned at her before repeating the movement.

Lexa tried to hold in the next moan so it came out sounding like a hum. But then Clarke was crawling back up her body. “You have to be kidding me!!” Clarke just laughed pressing a quick kiss to her lips before going back down and removing her underwear very quickly and setting herself next to her.

Lexa gasped when Clarke ran her finger through her folds. Clarke moved closer to her, “I knew you would like this, you are so wet right now, I bet you are going to cum so hard.” Lexa just nodded what Clarke was doing felt good but it wasn’t going to get her anywhere and she knew Clarke knew this.

“Baby please, I need you, I can’t do this.” Clarke nodded and sat up pulling Lexa up by her arms too. But then Clarke laid down and pulled Lexa on top of her.

She was seriously tempted to kick her out to teach her a lesson about making her wait so long. Clarke kissed her as Lexa straddled her hips realizing for the first time that Clarke was fully dressed. She sat up and pulled Clarke with her making quick work of removing her shirt and bra. When she went to tug on her shorts Clarke stopped her.

This was seriously bullshit, but then Clarke laid back down and grabbed her ass pulling her forwards higher and higher on Clarkes body. When Lexa had gone high enough so that she was straddling Clarkes face Clarke held her in place by her hips.

When she felt the first tentative lick of Clarkes tongue she pressed her hands against the wall to keep herself from collapsing. Without any warning Clarke drove her tongue in as deep as she could go, her nose bumping her clit. Lexa felt her body begin to shake already.

Clarkes hands on her hips began raising her up and down so that she was literally riding her face. She couldn’t help but quicken the pace, she couldn’t contain her moans it was impossible. She thought Clarke had been amazing before but this was reaching new levels that she didn’t know even existed until right now. She felt her tongue go even deeper causing the pressure to her clit to increase and that was all she needed.

“Clarke oh shit.” The English language left her in that moment.

Her orgasm hit her harder than any she had ever felt in her life. Her entire body was going through wave after wave of pleasure. It also lasted longer than any she had before, it was too much to handle, she swore she was going to die like this.

It took every ounce of strength she had to not completely collapse onto Clarkes face, she barely managed it. She jumped as Clarke thrust her tongue in one more time, finding the strength to drag her body off of her and collapse next to her instead.

She lazily grabbed Clarkes face and kissed her as hard as she could trying to convey how amazing that was to her. She laid her head on Clarkes chest dragging her hand up and down the girls smooth stomach. She sat up suddenly putting her hair up, she smiled at Clarke, she had some work to do and she was going to enjoy it.

**Clarkes POV**

She had never felt so accomplished of anything in her life, she felt how hard and long Lexa had cum on her tongue, every pulse of it caused Lexas walls to clench around her. She could tell how exhausted she was from it and wanted to tease her about it but she was honestly exhausted herself.

In this moment with the girl she loved in her arms she could never ask for anything more, it terrified her how close she had come to losing her, she would do everything in her power to make sure that never happened again. She closed her eyes trying to enjoy the moment but Lexa sat up quickly surprising her.

She opened her eyes and watched as Lexa put her hair up, she gulped hard. She knew what that meant and the smile Lexa gave her only confirmed her thoughts.

The sight of it made Clarke focus in on how needy she was right now, she wanted this, she wanted Lexa so bad. “You see, I could go your way and tease the shit out of you or I could make you cum faster and harder than you ever have.” Clarke gasped as Lexa quickly shoved her hand into her pants, swiping once before pulling it out and looking at her fingers.

“Just as I thought, always so eager baby.” Clarke was speechless, Lexa was right there was no denying it and she needed her release right now, the faster Lexa pushed her over the edge the better.

Lexa wasted no time she pulled Clarkes pants down along with her underwear in one go. She paused quickly pressing a kiss to her lips, she moved down to her chest and began fondling her breast. “God I missed these.” Clarke let out a little laugh at that. But then Lexa pressed a leg between hers and that shut her up quickly.

Lexa let her grind into her a little before removing herself. She wanted to complain but then Lexa kissed her center. She kissed her lightly over and over again driving her crazy. Didn’t she just say she wouldn’t be a tease?!

“Lexa please.” Lexa tilted her head to the side and nodded.

“I just need to taste you really quick. Do you want that?”

She nodded but Lexa didn’t make a move, she was waiting. “Please taste me.” Lexa smiled and began pleasing her, alternating between thrusting her tongue inside of her and running it around her clit. Everything she did sent tingles down to her toes, she was so close.

When Lexa sucked her clit into her mouth she thought she was going to cum, she began grinding into Lexas face with all her strength, her body tensed but right before she took the plunge Lexa stopped out of nowhere.

She shot her head up and looked down to see Lexa grinning. “You are kidding right!? Please tell me you are kidding!”

Lexa smile just grew, “Shh baby I’m going to take care of you.” Clarke hated hearing her words thrown back at her in that moment, she was just about to tell Lexa that when Lexa flipped her onto her stomach. What the hell was she doing?

She tried to turn back over but Lexa held her. “Trust me.” Clarke nodded, and felt Lexas hand on her hip pulling them up so she was on her knees.

And then Lexa tongue was back inside of her, and she was grinding back into her tongue, this was so damn hot. She whimpered when Lexa removed her tongue, but then she felt finger enter her, Lexa was on her knees behind her using her body to ram her fingers into her as hard and fast as she could.

Lexa still found a way so that her thumb was rubbing against her clit, and she was soon at the edge again and just prayed that she wouldn’t stop again. Clarke began thrusting her ass back meeting her rhythm. Suddenly she felt a hard slap on her ass and at the same time Lexa did a little twist with her fingers that sent her tumbling.

She stopped her movements as she came but Lexa only sped up making sure the orgasm lasted. With one hand plunging in and out of her while the other kneaded her ass, Clarke Griffin felt her entire body convulse, ever nerve in her body was yelling, screaming, screeching. She couldn’t handle the amount of pleasure that hit her. She collapsed onto her stomach causing the fingers to be removed, and even then she still felt herself clenching and unclenching on nothing.

Lexa was kissing her shoulder blades as she came down, it took awhile if she was being honest. When she could she turned she lifted herself onto her elbows so she could look at the girl beside her.

“Hi.”

She smiled, “Hi Lex.”

“So that’s what all the fuss about make up sex is huh?” Clarke laughed and swatted at her. Lexa smiled but her face grew serious right after.

“Seriously though Clarke, I don’t ever want to let you go or lose you again.” She nodded pressing a kiss to her temple.

“You won’t, I promise, I’m here to stay.”

Lexa looked at her intently trying to see if she was telling the truth.

“Good.”

They lay there for bit, Clarke moving her head onto Lexas chest.

“Clarke?”

“Yes baby?” She heard Lexas heart begin beating faster.

“I love you.” She felt her own heart stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo what did you think??? There is one chapter left which will be an epilogue! Thank you soo much for all of the love this fic has received. I never thought it would get to be this long but it has been an honor to share my story with you guys. One more chapter and we are done!


	28. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Random snippets of Clexa in the future, just to show how their lives turned out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, nothing crazy just good old Clexa times. Enjoy

Last day of Finals Week

**Lexas POV**

“Are you nervous? Don’t be nervous. Fuck I’m nervous.”

Lexa sat down next to Clarke on her bed and began rubbing circles on her back, she wasn’t nearly as nervous as Clarke seemed to be.

“Relax babe, they took it well when you told them about us right?”

Clarke nodded and leaned to lay her head on her shoulder. She pressed a kiss to her head trying to comfort her.

“I think it was harder for my mom to hear I’m officially majoring in art.”

“If it helps I think you made the right decision.” Clarke stood up and placed herself between her legs, pressing a kiss to her lips.”

“You are biased, I mean you are in love with me, I could draw a stick figure and you would think it was amazing.”

Lexa shoved her shoulder making Clarke giggle. She loved that sound more than anything, she pulled her back towards her after a moment. “Well I bet it would be the best stick figure I have ever seen.”

Clarke pressed their lips together again, She couldn’t help but wrap her legs around the blonde to pull her in even closer, she would miss her over break. When Clarke pulled back she couldn’t help but pout a little.

“Definitely biased.”

When there was a knock on the door they both jumped and separated. Lexa stood while Clarke opened the door. She waited while Clarkes father picked her up and spun her around. They were cute, she saw her mother glance at her quickly but looked away when they made eye contact.

She hoped this wouldn’t be too bad. When Clarkes father put her down, he saw her standing there and walked over, “Lexa right?” She nodded and stuck out her hand.

He just looked at it and then back up to her face, she slowly put her hand down and glanced over to Clarke who was watching him with worried eyes.

What Lexa didn’t expect was for him to grab her and pull her into a hug, she just kind of stood there before realizing she should hug him back. “Thanks for taking care of my baby.” Lexa saw Clarke smiling wide over her fathers shoulder that she couldn’t help but smile too.

When he let go Clarke went and stood next to her grabbing her hand. “So these are my parents Abby and Jake Griffin.”

Lexa nodded and smiled at them both, “It is nice to meet both of you.”

“This is Lexa, my girlfriend.” Lexa watched Abbys face as Clarke said that last part, she looked down at their hands and nodded stepping forward. She stuck out her hand for her to shake and Lexa did.

“It’s nice to meet you Lexa, thank you for being there for Clarke,” She didn’t know what to say to that so she said nothing.

“All right girls how about we pack all of Clarkes stuff, and I take you all out to lunch before we hit the road?”

They all began bringing things down, Clarkes parents seemed surprised by how strong she was and slightly annoyed that instead of helping Clarke chose to just watch her, it was embarrassing.

They piled into the car, Abby watched them through the mirror, she felt her eyes on her the whole drive, she knew where Clarke got her staring from.

When they sat down Lexa felt seriously awkward Clarke and Abby were both staring at her and she didn’t want to feel rude by saying something, thankfully she didn’t have to.

“Will you two stop staring at the girl?” You are making her uncomfortable.” Abbys eyes widened and she lightly punched her husband on the shoulder. Clarke didn’t even blink.

Abby gave her an apologetic smile, “Sorry, I never thought.. well it never crossed my mind, Clarke ever being with a girl.” That had Clarke snap out of her staring and focus back on Abby.

“Mother…” Clarke used a warning tone, Lexa just patted Clarkes hand to tell her it was okay and nodded for Abby to continue.

Abby glanced at Clarke before continuing. “But she’s told me a lot about you, you are good for her I can tell, and to be frank Lexa, you are very beautiful I can tell why she likes you so much. ”

Lexa felt herself begin blushing which caused Abby to laugh, she was able to mutter out a quick thanks before Jake changed the subject to save her.

Lunch was quick and before she knew it it was time to say goodbye. Jake and Abby both hugged her goodbye letting her know she was very welcome to visit as much as she wanted over break. Saying goodbye to Clarke was hard, but  she knew she would see her in a couple of weeks.

She pressed a final kiss to her lips. “I love you Clarke Griffin.”

“I love you Lexa Woods. I’m going to miss you.” She smiled at the words, she watched as Clarke get into the car with tears in her eyes as it pulled away. She didn’t make it back to her room before her phone alerted her to a message.

Clarke: Maybe I already miss you.

**Three Weeks Later**

**Clarkes POV**

The bus ride hadn’t been too bad two and half hours, she spent most of it asleep. The driver announced that they would be pulling into the station.

Clarke: Pulling in.

She waited for a response but got none, she really hoped Lexa wouldn’t be late to pick her up. She looked out the window as the driver parked, it was so pretty out today, she was glad she decided to catch an early bus.

After she grabbed her bag, she walked out to the front to see if Lexa was there. She jumped when someone placed their hands on her eyes.  She smiled.

“Lexa, don’t play games just kiss me!” She spun around to try and catch Lexa off guard but jumped when she saw it was Raven instead.

Lexa was standing next to her smirking as Raven bent over clutching her stomach and laughing. Clarke went to say something when all of a sudden she was in Lexas arms. It felt like home. Lexa pulled back slightly and pressed their lips together. They stood like that for a bit just taking eachother in. It had felt like so long since they had seen eachother.

When they finally separated she realized Raven was gone, and she spotted Lincolns car. They walked over and Clarke said hi to Lincoln.

“How are you and O? She constantly texts and calls me about you.”

“We are good, I miss her like crazy but she is coming up next weekend, so I’m excited.”

Clarke nodded understanding, she squeezed Lexas hand, she didn’t ever want to let go.

She wasn’t nervous until they pulled into the driveway, she was going to meet Lexas parents for the first time. She just hoped it wouldn’t be too bad. Lexa kissed her quickly before they walked in and she took a deep breathe.

The house smelled amazing, they walked straight to the kitchen where they found a woman who looked so much like Lincoln it was amazing.

“Mom, Clarkes here.”  The woman turned around and smiled at her and stepped forward pressing a kiss to her cheek.

“It’s nice to meet you Clarke. I hope you are hungry.”

Clarke nodded enthusiastically she was and it looked just as good as it smelled.

“Lexa go show Clarke where to put her stuff your dad should be down in a bit.” Lexa nodded but stopped at her moms next question.

“Raven, is Yadi coming over?” Clarke made a confused face, who was that? She wanted to know even more when she saw the blush Raven was sporting. “Umm no, not today.”

Lexa burst out laughing at Raven who stuck the middle finger up as soon as Lexas mother turned away. “Lexa be nice to Raven.”

Lexa grabbed her and ran towards the stairs before Raven could reach her. She ran to a room and threw herself on her bed laughing.

“Who is Yadi?”

“No one Clarke.” She turned and saw Raven glaring at Lexa.

“It’s her girlfriend.”

“She is not my girlfriend!”

“Fine it’s the girl she wants to be her girlfriend!”

Raven huffed and looked at Clarke, “No sex on my bed Griffin.”

She turned to Lexa who stood up, “Raven has a bed?” She nodded and reached under her own bed pulling out a second from underneath.

“That’s so cool! Wait I’m sleeping in your room?” Lexa nodded with a small smile.

“I promised my mom you wouldn’t sleep on mine.” She emphasized the word sleep, making Clarke shiver. Lexa noticed ofcourse and smiled pulling her close, they sat on the lower bed.  Lexa leaned in and kissed her, she doesn’t know if Lexa meant for it to be so deep but she didn’t complain.

When Lexa moved her lips to her neck she lost all words completely. While Lexa spoke between each kiss. “ I… missed….. you….. so…. Much…beautiful.” By the time she said beautiful she had Clarke on her back and was hovering over her.

But then the door burst open and Lexa jumped falling onto the floor. Clarke looked to see Raven standing there smirking.

“I said not on my bed.” She turned to walk away,” Oh yeah foods ready.”

Lexa grabbed the pillow and threw it at the door. She huffed and stood up grabbing Clarkes hand to pull her off the bed. “Remind me to lock the door tonight.”

When they got down stairs Lexas father was dancing around the kitchen twirling her mother around. Clarke couldn’t help but smile and laugh, which caught his attention.

He paused and stepped towards her, “you must be Clarke, this one can’t shut up about you.” Clarke smiled at Lexas blush before looking back at her father.

“It’s nice to meet you Mr. Woods.”

He smiled, “Call me Gustus, tell me Clarke would you like to dance?” Before she could say anything he grabbed her hand and began twirling her around the kitchen, she couldn’t help but laugh the entire time. For such a big man he was so kind and soft.

When he was done with her he turned to Lexa who began shaking her head and backing up, Clarke could tell she was trying her hardest not to smile. Her eyes widened as Lexa turned and began to sprint around the entire house with her father chasing her.

He caught back up to her in the kitchen when Raven and Lincoln cornered her, “Traitors!” Before she could say anything else her father grabbed her and began spinning her around as fast as was possible. She laughed the entire time.

Clarke looked at her in wonder, she had never seen her look so peaceful or so happy. It was amazing. While this was happening Lexas mother walked over to her and began speaking.

“She loves you very much, I thought her and Costia would last, but you make her happier than she ever did and for that I am grateful. Don’t hurt her.”

Clarke nodded her head without looking at her, “I love her more than anything, I will do everything I can to make her happy.”

“All right you two time to eat enough playing around!”

**Six Months Later**

**Lexas POV**

She laid in her bed with headphones on trying to finish up her final paper of the semester, she couldn’t believe she only had one semester left of her undergrad, and then on to law school. She jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

She turned to see it was Clarke, she took out her headphones.

“Whats up babe?”

Clarke looked so excited it was adorable. “I finished my final drawing come look.” With that she hopped off the bed and ran into her room, well her art room, She spent every night in Lexas room.

Over summer, the decided they wanted to live together but not alone, so they along with Raven and Octavia got an apartment just like the one Lexa had the year before, it worked.

While they spent every night together, her and Clarke having separate rooms helped them have some time apart if they needed it. The only down fall was having to keep their sex noises to a minimum or Raven would start yelling for them to shut up from down the hall.

Lexa got up and made her way to the room next to hers, it was a mess as usual with art stuff and clothes thrown around everywhere. She walked to Clarkes desk and her breathe was gone instantly.

It was her. She seemed to be standing with a bed sheet covering her butt, her legs and back fully exposed, her hair was over one shoulder while she glanced over the other as if she was turning to see who was watching her. Lexa took a step closer noting that on the back of her neck Clarke had drawn a broken infinity symbol.

Clarke had done amazing work before,  but this, it was amazing like nothing she had ever seen before. She turned to Clarke who had been watching her nervously. “What do you think?”

“Clarke this is…. Wow. I don’t even know what to say, it is your best work honestly, you chose right when you chose art.” Clarke smiled at her brightly .

“Well I have a beautiful muse.” Lexa rolled her eyes but kept smiling, and looked back at the picture.

“I want that tattoo.” Clarkes eyes widened.

“Really?”  Lexa nodded.

“I have always thought about getting it, but this has definitely convinced me.”

“I think you would look so sexy with tattoos.”

“Maybe I will.” She winked at Clarke before going back to her room to finish writing.

** Two Years later**

Clarke was pacing back and forth in front of Lexas school. She wanted everything to be perfect, it just had to be. What she didn’t expect was for Lexa to come storming out looking furious. Lexa stopped in front of her and grabbed her hand before dragging her away from the building.

“Umm Lex is everything okay?”

“NO!” Clarkes eyes widened, this was not good.

“What happened?”

“School, my professor is an idiot.”

Clarke didn’t really understand.

“Care to elaborate?”

“Not really.” Lexa stopped walking and spun to face her pressing a hard kiss to her lips. “Hello by the way, sorry.”

Clarke smiled and kissed her again softer this time, “Hello beautiful.”

Lexa sighed and began walking again, “Professor Pike just thinks his way of working is the only way, he won’t give me a chance.”

Clarke nodded, she was so glad to be done with school. “Just a couple more months babe and you will be a lawyer. You are almost done, don’t let him stand in your way.”

Lexa nodded, “I won’t. Where are we eating tonight?”

Clarke looked away from her then getting nervous, “I have something planned.”

“Are the girl joining us?”

“Nope, Raven is working and Octavia is with Lincoln.” Lexa nodded, she seemed to still be stuck in her thoughts.

When Clarke stopped in front of her gallery Lexa looked confused but didn’t say anything thankfully.

  
“Stay here for a second.” Clarke walked into one of the main gallery room and turned on the projector, the room was filled with what looked like the night sky. She laid the blanket on the floor. She walked into the second room and laid out another blanket along with the wine and all of Lexas favorite food that Raven had dropped off right before they got there. She walked around the room placing all of the candles and putting rose petals everywhere, she lit the candles. She turned the light off, she walked back out to see Lexa waiting impatiently. She motioned for her to come to the door.

“Close your eyes until I say to open them okay?” Lexa nodded closing her eyes. Clarke grabbed her hand and walked her forward. She walked her to the center of the room “Open them.”

She saw Lexas eyes open and heard the gasp as she took in the ceiling of the room. “Clarke this is beautiful, I can’t believe this.

Clarke shrugged even though Lexa wasn’t looking at her. “I know you love the sky Lexa and stars, I always catch you just looking up. If I could give you the world I would.”

Lexa turned to her and kissed her, “You are my world Clarke. I love you. This was a great surprise.”

Clarke laid down and pulled Lexa with her they laid there for only a couple of minutes.

“Clarke?”

“Yeah?”

“I only started looking at the sky after I met you, it reminds me of you, so it comforts me.”

Clarke turned and pressed a kiss to Lexas lips. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Clarke sat up and offerd Lexa her hand. “Where are we going?”

“One more surprise. Close your eyes.” Lexa looked at her suspiciously but nodded closing her eyes again.

Clarke led her to the next room and made her stand in the middle again, except this time she got on her knee in front of her, pulling a ring out of her picket.

“Open your eyes Lex.” Lexa looked all around the room first her jaw dropped taking everything in.

“Clarke this is beautiful, I can’t believe…” Lexas eyes widened even more the moment she saw her. Her eyes began to water, and Clarke couldn’t help it so did hers.

“Lexa, I have known you almost three years now and it has been the best three years of my life, you are the best thing to ever happen to me and I never want to let you go.”

“Clarke.”

“Shh let me finish. It hasn’t always been easy but it has always been worth it. I look at you and I see my future, because Lexa you are all I need to be happy. You are beautiful, kind, smart, and so damn strong. I want all your dreams to come true and when each of them does I want to be the person standing next to you. I love you with every part of me. I want to wake up next to you every day for the rest of my life, I want to have a family with you and grow old together. You aren’t just the love of my life you are my best friend.  Lexa Woods would you do me the honor and be my wife?”

Lexa dropped down onto her knees in front of her as tears went down her face. Clarke wiped her face and Lexa pressed their lips together over and over again, Clarke smiled pulling back.

“Lexa I kind of need an answer.”

Lexas jaw dropped again making her laugh. “Oh my god yes!! I forgot to say yes!”

** Three years Later**

**Lexas POV**

She couldn’t find the damn cookies, if she didn’t get the right ones Octavia would seriously break down, you don’t mess with a pregnant womans cravings, she learned that the hard way.

She stood in the snack aisle for what felt like forever when she was interrupted.

“Do you need help looking for something?” Lexa looked up to see a woman in a business suit talking to her. She looked back down again.

“My pregnant sister in law asked me to get her something and I can’t find it. My brother is going to kill me if I don’t get it.”

“Oh you brothers wife?”

Lexa looked up confused as to why the woman was still talking to her.

“Yes.”

“Good, well describe to me what it is she wants.”

Lexa shrugged and described it.

“Ohhh I think have seen those in a store by my house, if you follow me in your car I can show you. And maybe we can get a drink?” Lexa was shocked by that and just looked at the woman in front of her, was she seriously getting hit on in the supermarket? She didn’t get a chance to respond.

“How about no? If you were observant you would have seen that my wife is wearing a wedding ring. Or did you notice and just not care?” Lexa smiled and turned to see Clarke bouncing their fussy baby girl while she glared at the woman.

Lexa smiled at her and pressed a kiss to her cheek before grabbing Eve from her mother and turning back to the woman who was just staring at her shocked. “I think my wife has answered your question.”

The woman scurried away as fast as she could. Lexa just laughed and kissed Eve on her little nose, it still amazed her how beautiful their daughter was. Clarke had been the one to carry her using Lexas egg and a sperm donor who had Clarkes characteristics, but Eve looked just like Lexa with her brown hair except she had blue eyes.

“Thanks for coming to my rescue babe.” Clarke just glared at her.

“What?”

“You liked her flirting with you huh?” Lexa laughed which made Eve laugh which made Clarke smile.

“I didn’t realize she was flirting until the last thing she said Clarke, I just can’t find Octavias damn cookies.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and stepped up to her and grabbed something right behind her head. The fucking cookies. “I swear I didn’t see those! Evie tell mommy I didn’t see them.”

Eve just babbled at Clarke. Lexa kissed her head, “Thanks for having my back kid.” Clarke rolled her eyes and kissed Eves nose.

“You are lucky she is so cute.”

“Lexa looked at their daughter again, “She is isn’t she?”

“Yeah, maybe she gets it from you.”

Lexa pretended to study Eve and shrugged her shoulders, “Maybe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you soo much for sticking with me. I have loved writing this and love everyone who has been on this journey with me <3 Comments and Kudos will always be appreciated. Look out for my next story ;) It has been a pleasure <3


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